Just another lonely night?
Today I went with my parents to see Peter Pan. Bravo. Wonderful movie. Made me feel like a little kid again. Makes me wish I still had the fire to be a writer, but that flame went out with Sophmore English. Too many "rules" for me. My voice sounds like an old womans, thank goodness Ab Hol is over, or god forbid I wouldn't be able to sing. NOTE: Dripping Sarcasm.
Katie G. called today. We went to see Mona Lisa's smile. We saw Jeff and Austin. Jeff's coat didnt' fit. It was adorable. Another good movie. Is it odd/bad that the girl I related most with was the stereo typical slut? Of course that isn't why I identified with her, she was the rebel, and the free thinker, the one not cut out for house wifey stuff. And can anyone see me in an apron? Me either.
Afterwards we went to Applebees. Where I ran into Jenny Loya. What a bimbo. She honestly thought I was at the theatre the whole run of the show. I know I'm small but COME ON! Am I that hard to miss? Whatev. Katie and I had hot chocolate and dessert. A good time was had by all. Entonces we went to Liz's house, for lack of anything else to do. I was repremanded for coming over two nights in a row and not bringing her Christmas present. Then we went to Katie's to watch the Cold Play video FINALLY.
I'm devising a plan to start the car wars with Katie S. and Jackie. I must call Jackie tomorrow, it all starts on Katie's birthday. We're gonna get her good. Oh ya. Its on. I don't know why its on, but it should give us SOMETHING to do.
Quote:
Katie: So I walked in on my friend smoking weed in the freezer......
And now for something slightly more serious, and by serious, I mean depressing.
Stephan-
Why do you haunt my thoughts? Why, when I drive alone at night does my mind always drift back to you? Does not seeing you in nine monthes fade your memory at all? There is a song on one of the cds in my car that reminds me of you. I listen to it often. I know you don't thinka bout me this often. I know because you don't think about anything this often. I know you miss me. If you didn't you wouldn't say it. I know you're honest. And I know that there is still some sort of wierd existing love that we have. We talk about a "future" to often for that not to be true. I know we both speak about moving on. And I know that we both know its just talk. If it wasn't, I wouldn't think about you so much, and you would have told everyone we broke up when we did. I've dated since then. And I suppose you have to, though you never talk about it. Sometimes I wonder if the memorie of us isn't almost more idealistic then us ever was. A perfect match torn apart by space, distance, time. I dwell on this subject when I try and sleep at night, and I always come back to the same answer. If we were ment to be, we'll find our way back to eachother. But then the problem is if we ever really lost eachother. I'm thinking in circles again. I love you. I miss you.If I could do anything I'd kiss you. But I can't. The only thing I want to know from you is if you feel empty inside. In your heart. Since you left. Is it just me, and is it even you that makes me feel like this? Even if I'm standing in a room of crowded people, I still feel alone. Do you ever feel like that? I attribute getting better to you. I feel like if you were there with me, anywhere with me, I wouldn't feel alone. Is that silly? Should I date Alan and go about my bussiness and let you go about yours? Are we meant to be best friends? Or is this a facade that we both put on so we won't lose eachother entirely? We've both sacrificed for eachother. Is it worth it?
*Katie
If only I had the guts to say it to him. I've asked him nearly every question, just never at once. I don't really want answers. Just to send the questions out into some cosmic void were questions go to be at peace.
"Hands Down"
Breathe in for luck,
breathe in so deep,
this air is blessed,
you share with me.
This night is wild,
so calm and dull,
these hearts they race,
from self control.
Your legs are smooth,
as they graze mine,
we're doing fine,
we're doing nothing at all.
My hopes are so high,
that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me,
so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,
to break or bury,
or wear as jewelery,
which ever you prefer.
The words are hushed lets not get busted;
just lay entwined here, undiscovered.
Safe in here from all the stupid questions.
"hey did you get some?"
Man, that is so dumb.
Stay quiet, stay near, stay close they can't hear...
so we can get some.
My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me, so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,
to break or bury, or wear as jewelery,
which ever you prefer.
Hands down this is the best day I can ever remember,
I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,
the dim of the soft lights,
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers
and the time on the clock when we realized it's so late
and this walk that we shared together.
The streets were wet
and the gate was locked so I jumped it,
and let you in.
And you stood at your door with your hands on my waist
and you kissed me like you meant it.
And I knew that you meant it,
that you meant it,
that you meant it,
and I knew,
that you meant it,
that you meant it.
I've decided that tomorrow I may actually start and complete homework. AP sucks ass.
I hope everyone had a good night.
Katie G. called today. We went to see Mona Lisa's smile. We saw Jeff and Austin. Jeff's coat didnt' fit. It was adorable. Another good movie. Is it odd/bad that the girl I related most with was the stereo typical slut? Of course that isn't why I identified with her, she was the rebel, and the free thinker, the one not cut out for house wifey stuff. And can anyone see me in an apron? Me either.
Afterwards we went to Applebees. Where I ran into Jenny Loya. What a bimbo. She honestly thought I was at the theatre the whole run of the show. I know I'm small but COME ON! Am I that hard to miss? Whatev. Katie and I had hot chocolate and dessert. A good time was had by all. Entonces we went to Liz's house, for lack of anything else to do. I was repremanded for coming over two nights in a row and not bringing her Christmas present. Then we went to Katie's to watch the Cold Play video FINALLY.
I'm devising a plan to start the car wars with Katie S. and Jackie. I must call Jackie tomorrow, it all starts on Katie's birthday. We're gonna get her good. Oh ya. Its on. I don't know why its on, but it should give us SOMETHING to do.
Quote:
Katie: So I walked in on my friend smoking weed in the freezer......
And now for something slightly more serious, and by serious, I mean depressing.
Stephan-
Why do you haunt my thoughts? Why, when I drive alone at night does my mind always drift back to you? Does not seeing you in nine monthes fade your memory at all? There is a song on one of the cds in my car that reminds me of you. I listen to it often. I know you don't thinka bout me this often. I know because you don't think about anything this often. I know you miss me. If you didn't you wouldn't say it. I know you're honest. And I know that there is still some sort of wierd existing love that we have. We talk about a "future" to often for that not to be true. I know we both speak about moving on. And I know that we both know its just talk. If it wasn't, I wouldn't think about you so much, and you would have told everyone we broke up when we did. I've dated since then. And I suppose you have to, though you never talk about it. Sometimes I wonder if the memorie of us isn't almost more idealistic then us ever was. A perfect match torn apart by space, distance, time. I dwell on this subject when I try and sleep at night, and I always come back to the same answer. If we were ment to be, we'll find our way back to eachother. But then the problem is if we ever really lost eachother. I'm thinking in circles again. I love you. I miss you.If I could do anything I'd kiss you. But I can't. The only thing I want to know from you is if you feel empty inside. In your heart. Since you left. Is it just me, and is it even you that makes me feel like this? Even if I'm standing in a room of crowded people, I still feel alone. Do you ever feel like that? I attribute getting better to you. I feel like if you were there with me, anywhere with me, I wouldn't feel alone. Is that silly? Should I date Alan and go about my bussiness and let you go about yours? Are we meant to be best friends? Or is this a facade that we both put on so we won't lose eachother entirely? We've both sacrificed for eachother. Is it worth it?
*Katie
If only I had the guts to say it to him. I've asked him nearly every question, just never at once. I don't really want answers. Just to send the questions out into some cosmic void were questions go to be at peace.
"Hands Down"
Breathe in for luck,
breathe in so deep,
this air is blessed,
you share with me.
This night is wild,
so calm and dull,
these hearts they race,
from self control.
Your legs are smooth,
as they graze mine,
we're doing fine,
we're doing nothing at all.
My hopes are so high,
that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me,
so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,
to break or bury,
or wear as jewelery,
which ever you prefer.
The words are hushed lets not get busted;
just lay entwined here, undiscovered.
Safe in here from all the stupid questions.
"hey did you get some?"
Man, that is so dumb.
Stay quiet, stay near, stay close they can't hear...
so we can get some.
My hopes are so high that your kiss might kill me.
So won't you kill me, so I die happy.
My heart is yours to fill or burst,
to break or bury, or wear as jewelery,
which ever you prefer.
Hands down this is the best day I can ever remember,
I'll always remember the sound of the stereo,
the dim of the soft lights,
the scent of your hair that you twirled in your fingers
and the time on the clock when we realized it's so late
and this walk that we shared together.
The streets were wet
and the gate was locked so I jumped it,
and let you in.
And you stood at your door with your hands on my waist
and you kissed me like you meant it.
And I knew that you meant it,
that you meant it,
that you meant it,
and I knew,
that you meant it,
that you meant it.
I've decided that tomorrow I may actually start and complete homework. AP sucks ass.
I hope everyone had a good night.