Gai's Birthday Party! (Closed Log)
"Sing once again with me, our strange duet... My power over you, grows stronger yet.." Gai was singing once again as he jogged around his neighborhood. He was in a particularly good mood as he slowed to a pace in front of his house. His hands rummaged his pockets for his keys. After pulling out an assortment of items he finally found the keys. They jingled as he pushed them through the lock and let himself in.
Kakashi had just finished putting frosting on a cake when he heard keys in the lock on Gai's door. "Shit shit shit!" He grabbed Kurenai, who had been trying to drink whipped cream again, and hid behind the door.
Kurenai whined slightly as she put the can back into the fridge. She swallowed the white foam and tried to stay quiet. But it was kind of hard to hide a woman who was four months pregnant. Really hard. Her stomach poked out from underneath the curtain she was hiding behind.
Gai thought he heard a rustling when he walked into his house. He looked around a little bit, the decided it must have been the wind. He looked around his house when he saw what he thought was a deflated basketball underneath the curtain. "Huh?" he muttered to himself, "I thought I got rid of that old thing ages ago." He went to reach for it.
NUUUU!! Kakashi jumped forward, piggybacking Gai. "WHEEL OF FORTUNE!!!!" He stopped. "No wait..."
"Happy birthday!" Kurenai shouted, coming out from behind the curtain. She laughed and clapped happily. Thank God he didn't grab her stomach. She would've started giggling madly.
"WAAAAH!" Gai tried in vain to get the person off of his back. He flailed his arms about madly until he saw Kurenai step out from his curtain. "Whaa? Oh! My birthday!! Which means the one on my back is.." He turned his head to face Kakashi. "Wheel of Fortune?"
"Uh...." Kakashi looked around. "...Don't make me get Pat Sajack up in here." He looked down. Dear God, why are we still in this position!? "Kurenai, the present!"
Kurenai smiled and walked into the kitchen before coming back out, her hands behind her back. "Now close your eyes!"
Gai beamed and clapped his hands as he snapped his eyes shut. Gai loved surprises. He had assumed that his birthday would go skipped this year with everything going on. "Ok, ok! What is it?!" He bounced like a five year old.
Kakashi sighed with relief, glad to be off of Gai. When he began jumping about like a kindergartener, he slapped his hand. "WAIT, would you?" He scratched his head. "You act like Naruto on Red Bull some times, I swear..."
She laughed and held out a small, clear, plastic box. It was filled with a little water and inside was a small turtle. "Surprise!" she shouted, happily.
Gai opened his eyes to find a turtle looking back at him. He gasped and clapped his hands to his mouth. His eyes watered as he reached for the turtle. "Well, hello there..." He tapped the plastic lightly and the turtle looked around for the cause of the noise. "Awww..." He placed the box down and looked at his two smiling best friends. "You guys..." Then suddenly he ran over and hugged the both of them. "Thank you guys so much! You two are the best friends anyone could have! I love you guys!" Some tears escaped as he continued to hold his friends captive in his bear hug.
Kakashi felt himself being asphyxiated. "Gai...we love you too... leggo..." he gasped. "You're gonna put Kurenai into early labor."
As Gai let go, Kurenai gripped her stomach. She grinded her teeth and closed her eyes. "Ooowwww, not now...." She gripped Kakashi's hand tightly.
Gai quickly let go of the pair. "Oh no! Kurenai, I'm so so sorry!" He paced quickly to get his keys as he yelled at himself. "I'm such an idiot! Uhh... hospital! Yeah. Kakashi, call them! Tell them we've got a baby coming! Kurenai, come with me!" He grabbed her hand and started to pull at her.
Kakashi was dragged along since Kurenai still had a deathgrip on his hand. But something was suspicious. For one, her water hadn't broken. I'll play along. "No, Gai! Its too late! We'll have to deliver it ourselves. Go get some rubber gloves. Boil some water! GO!"
Kurenai had been good keeping a straight face but when Kakashi ordered Gai to boil some water, she bursted out laughing and stopped, standing up straight. She continued to laugh, snorting a few times.
Gai whipped his head around when he heard Kurenai cracking up. He stared at her. "What you laughing about, woman?! Have you gone mad?! You're in labor! Now, come on!" He pulled her into his bedroom and laid her down. "Uhh.. water.."
"Its her hormones! They've made her giddy! get an apron on! No, the frilly one, its a less obnoxious color! She might get mad if you wear the manly---er, brighter one!" Kakashi was amazed at his own ability to keep a straight face.
She rolled over on the bed and continued laughing as hard as she could. Kurenai managed to breath from time to time so she didn't practically die from suffocation. Tears fell down her face from laughter.
Gai ran to the kitchen to grab his apron and fill a pot full of water. He started to let it boil and ran back in the bedroom. "Oh no, oh no, oh no! Now what do we do!? Look at her, she's crying!" He bit on his nails with worry.
Kakashi couldn't help but splutter a bit. "Oh... I'm getting worked up too..." He turned to Kurenai. "Kurenai, should I give him makeup? Have him look like a nurse, make things more comfortable for you?"
She coughed a bit and tried to suppress a giggle. "Y-Yeah, it would make me much more comfortable." Kurenai dug her face into the pillow, howling with laughter.
Gai's eyes went wide. A- a nurse?! B-but.." Then he saw Kurenai howling into her pillow with pain. "O-oh my! Ok! Fine! But.. I don't have make-up!" Gai thought frantically. "Uhh.. Kurenai, purse?"
Kakashi was about to pull a stick of eyeliner from Kurenai's purse when he couldn't stand it anymore. He snorted, falling before reaching Gai, the eyeliner streaking a line down his face. Kakashi looked up and nearly exploded from laughter.
Kurenai joined in the laughter as she kicked her legs. Her diaphragm hurt but oh well.
Gai stared wildly at the pair. "What is this?! Why are you two laughing?! Am I... Wait a minute." Suddenly, Gai realized what they were up to. "HEY! You have have been playing me?!"
"H-hm? No, no, do c-continue..." Kakashi's sides hurt, and he continued to shake on the floor. "Oh my god..."
Kurenai managed to stop laughing but her chest still shook from trying to breath. "Sorry...I just had to do it..." She let out a soft chuckle.
Gai glared at the giggling pair, but he couldn't stay mad. After all, they got him a turtle. Gai loved turtles. He always wanted one. He huffed annoyed-ly and said, "I should probably go turn off the boiling water." And with that he was off.
Kakashi bit his lip. "He's...still wearing the apron...."
Kurenai burst out laughing again, slamming her fist down onto the bed. "BAHAHAHA!"
After he turned off the water, Gai went back to the bedroom. He saw Kakashi and Kurenai laughing hysterically. "What now?" Then he looked down and saw the ridiculous apron. "Oh.." He yanked it off. "Hmph. So, did you guys come here for a surprise party or to embarass the bejzzus out of me?"
Kakashi stood. "No, no. Now come on, I---er, Kurenai made a cake, and then we're going to go see..." he pulled tickets out of his pocket. "Late Night Catechism downtown."
She raised her brow. "I made a ca-aaake, yeah, I did!" she said, quickly catching onto Kakashi's sudden change. Kurenai smiled and nodded, standing up. "So cake first? Yes." She was extremely hungry and pushed past them to head to the kitchen.
"Oh boy!" Gai grabbed the tickets. In reality, he had never seen Late Night Catechism, but anything involving a ticket was good with him. "Hey!" he said to Kurenai as she rushed for the cake. "Women and their pregnancy cravings..."
Kakashi ran out to the kitchen. Oh HAELL no, I worked way too hard on that cake.
But Kurenai waited patiently, taking out three paper plates and beer [for them; water for her]. "So do you want to cut the cake, Gai?" she asked, smiling widely.
Gai smiled hugely at Kurenai. "But of course!" He carefully took the knife from the table and sliced into the cake. He cut even pieces. Then he thought he might get back at them at least partially for today's embarrassment. He pouted a little and said, "Hey! Where's my birthday song?"
Kakashi stroked his chin. "Ah, well, should we sing Kun-Fu Fighting? Or maybe The Internet is For Porn? Hyperactive Child?" Lightbulb! "Beerholes!" Kurenai slapped her forehead.
Gai tilted his head and looked at Kakashi. "Beerholes is a song...? NO! I want a REAL Happy Birthday song!" He pouted even more and crossed his arms against his chest.
Kakashi sighed. "You big baby, I made a cak--- sacrifice just buying you those tickets, so quit your bitching, son!" He had an urge to slap Gai upside the head, but didn't. Oh, the patience he had been cursed blessed with.
Kurenai continued to look on and sighed, rubbing her eyes. "Let's just sing it," she said. "Obviously he's trying to embarrass us like we did him." She wasn't stupid.
Gai smiled a little bit. "Well, maybe a little. But I really do want to hear you sing! It's birthday tradition." Gai's eyes light up. "Now lighten up! It's my birthday so you should all be happy. Now sing!" Gai felt like he was directing. He almost told them to pronunciate every word. Should I... nah. He awaited eagerly.
"Fine," Kakashi huffed. He sang the first two happy birthday to yous, then chimed in, "You look like a monkeeeey..." he glanced at Kurenai to finish. "And you smell like one too!" Kurenai shouted happily, throwing her arms into the air.
"Aw man... I should have expected that. Oh well! You guys sang! I'm happy." And indeed, Gai had a smile that stretched from here to Broadway. "Ok, it's cake time!" He handed a piece to each of them and dug in. "Wow! Kurenai, this is delicious!"
Kakashi grumbled something about credit. The cake was perfectly moist and the frosting had been applied with utmost care. It almost brought a tear to his eye. Almost.
Kurenai coughed, a piece of cake in her mouth. "Uh..yeah, my best work..." she managed to say. Oh man. She felt bad. But Kakashi would kill her for spilling his secret so she just continued to eat.
Gai grabbed himself a second piece. He had eaten half of it when he grabbed his stomach. "Uhh.. my stomach feels funny. I guess I'll eat later. Here Kakashi." Plop! Gai cracked an evil grin as he smashed his cake into Kakashi's face.
"...." Kakashi sat for a moment, the cake falling from his face slowly. He chuckled jovially before standing up. My creation... "MARIE ANTIONETTE NO JUTSU!!!" He picked up a slice of cake and started shoving it into Gai's face. Rage etched his face.
She coughed slightly, almost choking on her piece of cake. Kurenai couldn't stop laughing as she watched the pair. She leaned against the nearby dining table, managing to swallow the piece of cake.