Do Over Button
So, while I enjoyed many of my classes, I really think I did the wrong major. Then, working to some other strengths (in a I can do it, not a I love it fashion), I did the MBA...and still feel as if it was wasteful. B/c I don't have a natural ability to draw, and other conflicts, I never "fell into" art excepting with photography but there weren't many advanced options there to keep going.
I did find myself in production which at the time I considered very lucky, but while I loved editing, etc. the "journalism" side was a waste...but maybe not so if I had spent so more time in the strictly writing to make up for what I lack there. In this new age of technology and possibilities, if I could go back, I look back and realize where my interests and potentially SOME level of capability (enough to pay the bills while enjoying work) lead to graphic design. But now 25, and no money for such things, no sense of accomplishment I feel doomed to incompletion. To be that stupid idiot among 19 year olds again? And once I was so ahead... but never really was.
But still, I wish I could find a good job somewhere near to a school that offers design. Sadly I was at a University that did, and just didn't know it. Where I am now, though I could take classes, there are none fitting of my interests. How many hours wasted in literature classes and others. Writing is still interesting, as is reading (though I'm an escapist, which makes me a bad lit person, I don't CARE about the hidden message, was it a good story or not?), but I feel as if I pursued the wrong type, and never REALLY got some necessary foundations for various styles...I flew through high school and before never getting strong enough feedback to push me to be better. Moved around and praised to traditional academia that I didn't experience all the things I feel as if I'd love (starting with dance at 5). But what's a girl to do? Money, time, the right encouragement (not that I was given wrong, we can only teach what we know in some fashion or another) and here I am so...wistful for a different life.
I feel as if I have too little of anything to make go, just broad strokes of many things, enough to know I'm clueless and without the necessary background to get where I want.
Maybe by the time I'm 30, I'll actually be at the starting point of most 22 year olds to a future.
I did find myself in production which at the time I considered very lucky, but while I loved editing, etc. the "journalism" side was a waste...but maybe not so if I had spent so more time in the strictly writing to make up for what I lack there. In this new age of technology and possibilities, if I could go back, I look back and realize where my interests and potentially SOME level of capability (enough to pay the bills while enjoying work) lead to graphic design. But now 25, and no money for such things, no sense of accomplishment I feel doomed to incompletion. To be that stupid idiot among 19 year olds again? And once I was so ahead... but never really was.
But still, I wish I could find a good job somewhere near to a school that offers design. Sadly I was at a University that did, and just didn't know it. Where I am now, though I could take classes, there are none fitting of my interests. How many hours wasted in literature classes and others. Writing is still interesting, as is reading (though I'm an escapist, which makes me a bad lit person, I don't CARE about the hidden message, was it a good story or not?), but I feel as if I pursued the wrong type, and never REALLY got some necessary foundations for various styles...I flew through high school and before never getting strong enough feedback to push me to be better. Moved around and praised to traditional academia that I didn't experience all the things I feel as if I'd love (starting with dance at 5). But what's a girl to do? Money, time, the right encouragement (not that I was given wrong, we can only teach what we know in some fashion or another) and here I am so...wistful for a different life.
I feel as if I have too little of anything to make go, just broad strokes of many things, enough to know I'm clueless and without the necessary background to get where I want.
Maybe by the time I'm 30, I'll actually be at the starting point of most 22 year olds to a future.