The day is almost over
Well the first Thanksgiving without my Mother is over... It has been a very hard day... It almost felt like being in a daze like state... I mean you know what is going on around you and you hear everything that everyone says but its almost like in slow motion and very drawn out... I dont know if that makes sense to anyone but... The tears have fell in abundance today... I have held them at bay only to be overcome... Its hard to believe she wasnt here with us today... It just didn't feel right...
On top of trying to make it though the day without my Mother, Andy wasnt home to try and help with any of it... He wont be home until after the first of the year... I got to talk to him this morning though, which was his evening... They had already had their Thanksgiving dinner... The hodgies fixed up stuff... I just hate that it wasnt the traditional dinner... I hate that he isnt home... I hate that he has to spend any holiday in The Land of the Sand... I hope when he comes home its for good... That could be just wishful thinking on my part... This proggie that he is on could drag on for a couple of years... Oh well enough of my whining for now...
I am thankful and grateful for so much regardless of the sadness I am filled with today