Angsty rant....
I just watched Se7en on TNT. I forgot how good that movie was.
Anyway...
There's been this weird meloncholy feeling that's been hanging over me for a while. I don't know why. Strangely, some songs make me realize how down I feel...Not just because they're depressing or anything. Just when I hear them, I start feeling odd. Like today, I heard "Ordinary World" by Duran Duran. It made me start longing to get of Florida badly.
This period has been good for art though. That or Iv'e magically gotten better without trying. Still can't post anything on the the net yet.
It just feels like something's missing. I'm trying to find what it is, but I'm busy supporting others, and trying to keep my sanity.
The only thing that really keeps me grounded anymore is the fact that I have Bryan, and some other close friends that keep in contact with me. I don't think they realize how important they are.
Bryan's always willing to listen, and he tells me so...But a lot of the time he gets so wrapped up in his own issues, that I try to help support him through, that he sometimes just isn't...as supportive as he used to be. For example, the other day, he ran into his dad. For reasons I can't say, the meeting did not go well. Therefore, he decided that he "needed" something that I've decided I don't like. But whatever.
I just get brushed aside so often that I usually don't say much of anything anymore. People complain about that, but I almost can't help it. I've grown up having to do the same thing, and apparently, it's not going to end for a while yet.
I'm just fed up.
Talk to me.
Take me away from here.
Support me for once, instead of vice-versa.
Otherwise, I'll just do what I always do. I'll put this away for now, and bring out that familiar mask a lot of poeple have grown to love.
I hate it.
Anyway...
There's been this weird meloncholy feeling that's been hanging over me for a while. I don't know why. Strangely, some songs make me realize how down I feel...Not just because they're depressing or anything. Just when I hear them, I start feeling odd. Like today, I heard "Ordinary World" by Duran Duran. It made me start longing to get of Florida badly.
This period has been good for art though. That or Iv'e magically gotten better without trying. Still can't post anything on the the net yet.
It just feels like something's missing. I'm trying to find what it is, but I'm busy supporting others, and trying to keep my sanity.
The only thing that really keeps me grounded anymore is the fact that I have Bryan, and some other close friends that keep in contact with me. I don't think they realize how important they are.
Bryan's always willing to listen, and he tells me so...But a lot of the time he gets so wrapped up in his own issues, that I try to help support him through, that he sometimes just isn't...as supportive as he used to be. For example, the other day, he ran into his dad. For reasons I can't say, the meeting did not go well. Therefore, he decided that he "needed" something that I've decided I don't like. But whatever.
I just get brushed aside so often that I usually don't say much of anything anymore. People complain about that, but I almost can't help it. I've grown up having to do the same thing, and apparently, it's not going to end for a while yet.
I'm just fed up.
Talk to me.
Take me away from here.
Support me for once, instead of vice-versa.
Otherwise, I'll just do what I always do. I'll put this away for now, and bring out that familiar mask a lot of poeple have grown to love.
I hate it.