(no subject)
The game begins with plans to make the Inverted Burger Wrap, which in the lens of hindsight I can sadly report was never actually made. To recap where our previous game ended, the PCs had just smashed down a barricade in the pursuit of dwarfs. Aliarra begins shouting information into the microphone so that it will be preserved for posterity.
Aliarra: King of Faldric, Delryn Faldric. King of the dwarves, Roten Steelbeard. Keldyn, oracle of the Fjordborn. Ardqua, champion of the Fjordborn. Ignir (Iggy), Fjordborn scout! Erukai, Fjordborn name for Skeldric. Denlos, Archmage of the Mages’ Guild. Carrick, High Mage of… have we been spelling his name anywhere like that?
DM: I think you did it with a “K”.
Aliarra: Ethron, Magister of Serkusk.
DM: Ethroni.
Aliarra: Ethroni, there’s an I there. Sirtar, archaelogist WHO formed the Kalrothian compound, there’s a capital W there for some reason. WHO formed!
The group begins fighting over sourcebooks and Vera’s netbook is mocked for appearing to be something a leprechaun would use. Once again the group elects to dick around with the microphone, as for some reason the pain of your loyal transcriber is like crack to them. The group argues for an inexplicably long time about Transformers, as is their wont. Aliarra attempts to open a root beer bottle with a longsword. The DM sets out the minis to prepare for the battle; an alarming number of dwarves have appeared. An alarming number of these minis are also not dwarves; the players replace them with actual dwarf minis. Aiden complains that everyone went out for food but him.
Aiden: I told everybody! “Maybe I should call Aiden when I’m going for food, so he can ask for something, if he paid me.” You guys are going to get something, maybe Aiden wants something. He likes burgers, he likes fries, he likes chicken god damn nuggets.
Aliarra: But, but, but Aiden, you also like complaining. Possibly more than any of those things.
Aiden: You guys don’t do it!
Aliarra: Look at it this way, by not doing it we’re doing you an even BIGGER favor.
Aiden: I don’t wanna complain, I’d rather eat!
Aiden attempts to compare himself to Fat Albert, which goes off into rants about cows altered to make cheese in their bodies. After a moment attention returns to the game. Then a different game entirely. Then the inexplicable sexual tension between Megatron and Ratchet.
Drusila: Come on guys! D&D! I gotta be out of here by ten, I didn’t come here for Transformer porn.
Vera: Well that’s a shame.
Mrrshala: That’s what I came here for…
Mrrshala attempts to place her mini in a ludicrous place on the map. The dwarves ‘officially’ appear around the corner.
Aliarra: Look out, they’re in the Flying V formation.
Drusila: “Oh, those are dwarve! Hi, guys!”
Vera: They’re not trying to attack, they’re flying south for the winter!
DM: These are not like the dwarves you met in the dwarven kingdom, though.
Hanzo: Are they undead?
DM: No, no.
Aliarra: They’re just evil.
Mrrshala: They’re Dark Iron.
Aliarra: Evil.
Aiden: Huh, they’re just… what’s to describe? They’re dark dwarves. They’re dwarves and they’re darker.
For the D&D savvy, they’re duergar. Drusila is adequately convinced they’re evil by their evil description. Aiden foolishly rolls a White Betrayer die for initiative and comes up with a 3.
Hanzo: “Obey!” Maybe he was just telling his skeletons he wanted some spice on his French fries. “Old Bay!”
Drusila’s role as a ninja baker is briefly acknowledged. For no real reason a long diatribe about vampires, mages, and the Tremere occur. Drusila predicts that Grandfather will return as a vampire.
Hanzo: “Blah, shut your mouth, blah!”
Aliarra: The twist is that Barack has specifically ordered him to become a vampire, under the table. This is how he solves his excess woman problem… pretends not to know. “Sire, another woman was drained of all her blood!” “Oh, dear. We’d better find the vampire responsible for this. Try looking in NOT Grandfather’s quarters.”
Aiden: He just keeps a bunch of vampires in Grandfather’s quarters?
Aliarra: No, Grandfather IS the vampire.
Drusila attempts to return to the game, but no one knows whose turn it actually is. The DM begins with the lead dwarf.
DM: The lead dwarf, after shouting what seems to be a charge…
Aiden: And he poops himself.
A long silence except for Vera’s giggling.
Aliarra: That was a waste of an action.
Vera: The smell incapacitates everyone around.
Aiden: My character has a new ability, as a swift action can cause an enemy NPC to poop himself.
DM: He draws his fist back, up, then down to the ground, slamming down his fist. From where his fist lands, the ground erupts, tearing apart into a wave towards those three right in front of him.
Drusila: I had to move, didn’t I.
DM: Reflex saves!
Aliarra rolls for Mrrshala, as she has wandered off. Drusila rolls, then attempts to swap out her 20-sider. Drusila gets the inevitable call to come home. Those who failed take 24 points of damage. Drusila ponders hiding so the player can go home properly, but it turns into clambering up onto a barricade out of range of the dwarves. Her Jump roll is adequate to grab and haul herself up. She then fires off her favorite weapon, the mithril mist chain shirt. A few extra actions may have been taken in all this. Aliarra promptly advances, rolls a 1, drops her guisarme, and recalls it to her hand with her weapon crystal.
Aiden: Have you done any damage to them?!
Aliarra: No!
Aiden: Then it’s perfectly acceptable for me to do my BWAH heal because I’m not healing them anyway.
Hanzo: BWAH heal!
Aiden: Maybe they think we’re helping them. “Oh, this crazy person heal us. Maybe he friend.” “What did they say?” “They’re gonna let you live.” “All right! KILL THEM!”
Mrrshala: (taking an AOO) Does a 16 hit?
DM: No.
Aiden: These guys are quite armored.
Aliarra: No, we’re just rolling shitty -- (watching the DM move a dwarf through everyone’s threatened range dramatically)) -- is he tumbling?
DM: (nodding gleefully)
Aliarra: Tumbling fucker!
Hanzo: A tumbling dwarf?
The dwarf rolls straight up to Hanzo, to his shock and disbelief. Aliarra urges them to hit her, to trigger her crusader powers.
Hanzo: If he strikes you down, you’ll become more dead than you can possibly imagine.
The dwarf punches Hanzo for 14. The group begins fretting over their terrible luck. Vera prepares to cast entangle, but once again the group has divided up its Players’ Handbooks in such a way as to ensure that no one who needs one has one. Aiden mutters his plans to slay the PCs in the game he will soon be running. Vera decided the cave lacks plants, looks to see if she prepared Transmute Rock to Mud, but finds only its unloved bastard cousin, Soften Earth and Stone, on her list. The stone beneath the dwarves would become soft clay… to absolutely no effect. Drusila yells for her to cast Magic Missile. More effectually, and possibly, she casts Summon Swarm instead, hauling out a ton of spiders.
Aliarra: I’d like to point out that this is not my game, spiders may not be as effective!
Vera: It was either bats, rats, or spiders.
Aliarra vows that their next challenge in her campaign will be to catch a roadrunner. The group attempts to threaten the dwarves with beards eternally cursed with spiders if they don’t surrender, but no one can speak Dwarven. The swarm boils up around the dwarves.
Drusila: How are they reacting to the swarm of spiders?
Hanzo: It’s hard to tell from the milky whites of their eyes.
Drusila: Are they trying to comb them out of their beards? Are they… ignoring them stoutly?
Aliarra: They’re dwarves, they ignore everything stoutly, except beer.
Mrrshala: They do everything stoutly, including beer. They love their stout.
Alirra: How do I get the pita to you…?
Mrrshala: Stop being a dick.
Aiden’s turn comes up and the group argues over who should get healing. Drusila gets the healing and is restored to full. Aiden demands Aliarra do whatever it is that lets her crit so much as a DM; she obligingly attempts to take over as DM. Mrrshala uses Emerald Razor on the badass guy, but alarmingly a 24 against its touch AC barely hits. Good lord. Drusila disarms a dwarf. Aliarra uses White Raven Tactics on Mrrshala, then rolls the Orange God Die, which, true to form, rolls a 17. (Historic note: The Orange God Die is an original orange-and-black d20 which came with the original purchase of a D&D box set. Across the ages it historically has rolled so many 17s that the number is, in fact, faded.) A dwarf moves forward to bull rush, and Aliarra and the DM get in a debate over whether or not an AOO ensues, which Aliarra wins (it had the improved feat, but was moving out of her threatened area).
Aiden: I don’t fight Aliarra on the rules of D&D any more. She could tell me like, “You do that, monkeys eat bananas” and I’ll be like whatever, I don’t care any more.
Aliarra misses her AOO. Aiden accuses the DM of cursing the dice as Aliarra gets bull-rushed. The DM starts to roll crappy too. Aliarra is bull-rushed into the spider swarm.
Vera: There’s like a cursed vortex above the table or something.
A dwarf, distracted by the spiders, discharges his crossbow into another dwarf. Vera’s turn comes up.
Vera: Okay, the spiders are fine where they are.-
Aliarra: Hey! No they’re not!
Vera: What?
Aliarra: No they’re not! Get them off me!
Vera: They’re on you?! Where are you?!
Aliarra: I’m right there!
Vera: Well you’re the dumbass that walked into it!
Aliarra: I got bull-rushed, where have you been?
Mrrshala uses Sapphire Nightmare Blade, and eventually hits once it is pointed out to her that she was failing to apply every single positive modifier to her attack besides her base attack bonus. Vera is still debating on what spell to cast, by virtue of having prepared only spells from the Spell Compendium, then forgetting the book. While waiting for her to decide, the group utterly inexplicably starts discussing the Great Videogame Crash of 1983, I think because the Angry Video Game Nerd had touched on the game briefly in the most recent video. Vera finally casts sand blast on a dwarf previously disarmed by Drusila.
DM: “Agh, me beard! First spiders, now sand!”
The dwarf is stunned by the spell. Aiden’s turn comes up.
Drusila: There’s an unarmed dwarf next to you, maybe he’ll get some sort of penalty to his AC for being unarmed.
Aiden: …there’s no penalty to AC for being unarmed.
Drusila: That’s true.
Aliarra: …this is why everybody listens to me on the rules, because look what kind of shit Drusila comes up with.
Aiden: That just sound ridiculous. Being a monk would be impossible!
Aliarra: Well, technically, if he had a defending weapon… but he DOESN’T.
DM: Like a main-gauche!
Aliarra: Like the enchantment.
DM: Oh, I see.
Aliarra: Lets you use some of its bonus to AC? My goal is to someday get all of my armor spikes enchanted as +5 defending weapons.
Aiden irritatedly attempts to burn off some wand charges, feeling his supply has gotten way too large. Aliarra ends up enlarged.
Drusila: Drusila gets bored on the wall.
Aiden: Ohhhhhh..
DM: Uh-oh, the “B” word.
Aliarra: Gavin Tael emerges. Were-gnomes appear.
Drusila: Aliarra, which space are you standing in?
Aliarra: All four of them.
Drusila: Are you enlarged?
Aliarra: Yes.
Drusila: So you threaten everyone in the room. Help me get a sneak attack on someone!
Drusila draws a scimitar and leaps off the wall, narrowly missing Aiden. Stalagtite vs. stalagmite mnemonics are brought up. Drusila attempts to disarm, rolls a 2, and promptly activates her mithral mist shirt. Mrrshala freaks out when it is implied she’s still using her ranseur, when in fact she switched to her bastard sword long ago. She strikes a dwarf for punishing damage, but does not take that dwarf. The dwarf counters by punching her with a hand that encases itself in stone to the face. Aliarra starts throwing out AOOs like her crusader build demands. Drusila goes to pick up a dropped weapon. A dwarf moves; Drusila promptly attempts to AOO it and botches her attack roll. Sullen, Drusila moves to leave. The group encourages her to blame traffic like mad. Vera casts Foundation of Stone on Aliarra, granting +2 to AC and +6 to Strength on top of her enlargement.
Aliarra: All right, I’m powered up now!
Vera: Super Saiyan!
DM: Aiden!
Aiden: Huh? I’m sorry, I was stunned by this ridiculous act.
Hanzo: Attack the doors!
Aliarra: But you can’t-
Hanzo: OBEY!
Aiden moves forward to heal Mrrshala.
Aiden: And was it a perverted style of healing… I rolled a 10 so it was not.
Aliarra: You don’t get groped.
Hanzo: Wait, you do GROPE-HEALS?
Mrrshala: At this point I’d take the grope heals.
A long rambling side conversation occurs. Someone hits the boss dwarf, possibly Aliarra, slaying him. I’m not sure who because people were blah blah blahing more loudly than the actual game. Aliarra yells at Mrrshala to roll her attack; she does 24 points of damage or something, while Aliarra starts trippin’ and’ crittin’ some dwarves. The side conversation, meanwhile, has developed into an extensive dialogue on MMOs in sociological and design aspects. Why was I considering livestreaming these again? No one would listen.
Aiden: (recalling the actual game) …is anyone hurt? Do I need to heal anybody or can I swing my mace? Does anyone need healing?!
Aiden maces a dwarf for 10 points of damage. Hanzo finally rolls a hit. Crappy damage, but still a hit. Aliarra whacks the dwarf as well. An argument over Mrrshala’s ranseur again erupts as she finishes the dwarf off. The dwarf incurs AOOs, and Aliarra essentially punches him into Hanzo’s dagger. Aliarra attempts to roll the large steel d20; Hanzo scolds her for rolling a die which never rolls well. The fight finally ends.
Aiden: The spiders are still there! THE SPIDERS ARE STILL THERE!
Vera: Dismiss the spiders!
Aiden: THEY’VE GONE OUT OF CONTROL!
Vera: The spiders start nesting in the dead bodies.
Aiden: “I’ve prepared for this!” Pull out a box… (making a shattering noise as he mimes breaking open the box) “Alchemist’s fire!”
Aliarra: I like how you kept those fragile glass vials in another fragile glass box.
Aiden: I have Havard’s Handy Glass Box.
Aliarra: Heward’s.
Aiden: No, this is his brother Havard!
Vera: In case of spider emergency.
Aiden: No, this one is “in case spiders have turned on you and gone rogue.”
Aliarra: How many of those do you have?
Aiden: A lot.
Mrrshala: …how did you get hummus in your hair?
The PCs loot the corpse. The DM starts reading off numbers.
Aliarra: Write it down, rogue-type, that’s all you’re good for!
It’s a large quantity of coins. The PCs argue over who will carry them all, despite the fact that the DM doesn’t use encumbrance rules. They also find a magic ring. The group discusses whether or not they can afford to rest.
Hanzo: Look at it this way, if we take time to rest, the DM can throw something else at us - meta. If we don’t take time to rest, whatever he’s got laying in wait for us won’t be as bad.
Aiden: Let’s keep moving.
Aliarra: Purely NOT meta, I think we should continue on.
Hanzo: In character I’m against it, but I’ll defer to the group.
Aiden: I got wands and scrolls left for healing.
Vera remembers she’d totally forgotten about her giant bat during the entire fight. The group moves down the hallway swiftly, climbing over the rubble they’d created long ago.
Aliarra: I just walk over, I don’t need to pick! Boots of the Mountain King, baby!
DM: I know, shut up!
Aiden: And then the rest of us sit there and watch as she climbs over, stuck behind the rubble…
The group steps into darkness, with only pulsing blue light in the distance. It’s the storm golem, but everyone has forgotten. Mrrshala, who briefly went upstairs, scares Aiden by coming back down.
Aiden: I was wondering who was moving upstairs!
Mrrshala: Oh no, it’s the crazies!
Hanzo: Well, dude, what’s somebody gonna do, they gonna come down here with a gun? “What do you want, you want a bunch of D&D books? Go ahead.” Then while you’re on the way out they’re gonna hunt you down and tackle you.
Aliarra: Yeah, we’ve got SWORDS, okay?
Aiden: “FREEZE! Oh never mind, it’s just a bunch of nerds!”
Hanzo: “Freeze”? That’s what the cops say!
DM: Crooked cops.
Aliarra: I’m sorry, sir, my Dodge roll says you did not hit me. That’s… awkward.
Aiden: “You better roll your attack roll before you shoot that gun, officer!”
Hanzo: “Roll for initiative! I go way before you do, so you’re gonna have to wait until I’m done punching you before you shoot me.”
Aliarra: “I’m sorry, according to the Diplomacy roll, you accede to my request to not be tased.”
Hanzo: “Fireball! Fireball! Fireball!”
The DM starts drawing out the map, places a massive mini down on the field. Aliarra mutters hopes that it’s a statue, obviously futilely. This is the storm golem. The party glumly realizes they have no resistance spells. They slowly advance, and as Hanzo gets closer the storm golem turns to look at him.
Hanzo: Speak! I think one of us should actually try to speak to him!
Silence.
Hanzo: “Hello. I’m Peter. Where are you from? Originally.”
Vera: “Peter”?
Hanzo: Yeah, it’s what they said originally, tried talking to a ghost at the beginning…
Aiden: I don’t know why you’re going stupid.
Hanzo: “Get her!
Aiden: “That was your plan, Ray? Get her?”
DM: It regards you with a silent stare.
Hanzo: “Do you speak?”
Aliarra: “THOU HAS GREETED ME.” All right, I’m gonna try something that’ll either provoke it to fighting, or…not.
Hanzo: Walk closer?
Aiden: (off in his own little world) Oh no, what is Roll doing in this Mega Man…
Aliarra: I reach into my backpack and produce the gloves, which I hold up. I step forward.
Hanzo: That’s pretty close now. One more step forward and he’s in your threatened range.
Aiden: …I look up Mega Man and there’s a picture of Felicia in here…
Aliarra: Get ready with that enlarge wand, there.
The golem does not appear to be responding one way or the other. The party continues to approach, but the golem holds out his hands in a ‘stop’ motion. The golem at last speaks in a hollow tone, refusing them passage. Sadly, Aiden muttering about Mega Man is louder than the actual game.
Aliarra: All right, let’s see if we can try a rousing speech to get past it. “Emgrad Sulinier is dead! The world that he was a part of is no longer this world! Times have changed.”
DM: “My prerogative does not change.”
Aliarra: “It must, for the good of the world!”
Aiden: …are you rolling high on your Diplomacy checks for this?
Aliarra: Waitin’ for the DM to tell me to roll a Diplomacy check!
Hanzo: It’s probably immune to anything you could say to it.
Aliarra: Probably! But that won’t stop me from trying!
DM: Give it a roll, let’s see.
Aliarra: Watch me roll crappy. Uraaaaah! 20.
DM: “I was created for this purpose and this purpose alone. I must continue doing this until my demise.”
Hanzo: That was all I had…
Aliarra: Yeah, me too.
Hanzo: Roll for initiative!
The golem will not engage them until they try to pass, though, so they pre-heal and buff. Vera realizes she has exploding spikes, which are basically magical land mines - when planted, they arm a round later then detonate whenever something comes within 10 feet. Aliarra chugs an enlarge potion to the Popeye tune. Mrrshala forgets she is not Aliarra. Vera passes an exploding spike to Hanzo, figuring he can use it better. Aliarra uses White Raven Tactics on herself and she and Mrrshala are up next. She rolls a 24 on her Strength check to trip the golem, which brings the golem down, then she and Mrrshala pound the thing. Everyone forgets golems can’t be crit, which is kind of amusing in retrospect.
DM: Energy beams coalesce around him, and tendrils of lightning go… (the sound effect the DM inserts sounds more like stir fried roadrunner than anything, as he moves the figure to a different location and sets it upright.)
Aliarra: He’s TELEPORTING! And he stands up as a part of its action! What a cheapass!
Vera: Son of a gun.
Hanzo: I got a hot potato now…
DM: He points a large index finger at Aliarra.
Aiden: Oh no, finger of death!
Aliarra: It’s just a lightning bolt.
Aiden: DM’s like, “Nope, finger of death.”
Hanzo: Why give it the lightning powers if it’s gonna have something like finger of death?
Vera: Hey what’s this thing made out of?
DM: Metal.
Vera: Oh. Okay.
Aiden: Oooh! OOH! OOOOOOH! I’m gonna use heat metal now! I don’t know what it does to a creature made entirely out of metal but I wanna find out!
Vera: Oh she’s about to HAND me something that’ll heat metal…
The golem does some wicked chain lightning. In chorus, the players ask if it’s vile damage. Aliarra eats half of 35, the others eat either 18 or 9 respectively. Aide casts his spell as plan. The group argues for about 10 minutes about how to plant the exploding spike, which makes no sense from an in-game perspective but no one cares. Hanzo runs in to spike it, then is hauled out by Vera’s bat.
DM: The bat swoops in, grabs your arm, and hauls you…
Aliarra: Off to be devoured.
DM: Into the waiting arms of the golem.
Vera: “No, Blinky, whyyyyy?!”
In reality the bat drops Hanzo off safely further away. The players grimly try to figure out if this magical equivalent of a land mine will actually function the way they want to and if the golem will be able to pick it up, or just drive it further into the ground.
Aliarra: (miming the floor exploding) Gold! We struck a vein. “Hey golem, let us go and we’ll give you the mining rights to this vein!”
DM: “Okay…” It’s thinking, why is it actually thinking?! Why do I write these things dooooown?!
Aliarra: “Weakness: GOLD.”
Inexplicably, 8-bit music dominates the game. (Castlevania if anyone is wondering.) The group ponders if beating the golem will give them its powers, plus Item 2. Aliarra and Hanzo both get to roll Reflex saves as they get lightning bolted. Vera gets called upon to roll the 10d6 for the spike, while Aliarra sings the Fireball song. 34 damage results. Aliarra misses her attack, Mrrshala hits. The golem teleports to the freaking ceiling, then plummets down on them. Aliarra whacks it with an AOO for 15 as it descends. Its crash rolls out massive tremors; more Reflex saves for all. Hanzo and Aiden fall over. Hanzo attempts to Tumble away but botches. The golem misses by 1, which Aliarra takes credit for thanks to her Iron Guard’s Glare. Vera spikes another exploding spike, then runs. Mrrshala hits with Insightful Strike for 35, Aliarra with Foehammer for 24, then Aliarra uses White Raven Tactics to set Mrr’s initiative one lower. She uses Sapphire Nightmare Blade on it. Aliarra gets bolted again. The DM rolls all ones on his first handful of dice, and the damage works out to 20.
Aliarra: “I’ve had harder shocks from petting a Banglasharan in winter! Is that the best you can do?!”
Someone spikes feedback into the microphone. The loyal transcriber complains about being hauled off the Metro as a medical emergency. Aiden casts Prayer. Hanzo charges into the fray, the realizes he’d run into the radius of the exploding spike and reverses course. Vera’s turn comes around and the spike detonates to a chorus of the Fireball song. Vera ponders throwing a tanglefoot bag but the group points out it will just teleport out. The vampire monk is brought up AGAIN. Aliarra misses but Mrrshala hits.
DM: After Mrrshala, the golem… (tipping the golem over)
Aliarra: WE WIN!
DM: Curls up into a ball.
Hanzo: Oh nooooooo.
DM: The lightning around him starts to become more erratic.
Aliarra: Uh-oh!
Hanzo: Blanka!
Mrrshala: Ohhhh no. Run away!
Aiden pitches a dispel at the golem which sadly does nothing. Hanzo runs. Vera runs.
Aliarra: I can’t get away in time, so I’m gonna try to save our lives. BULL RUSH!
Hanzo: You know as soon as you get in range you’re probably gonna get electrocuted.
Aliarra: We’ll see. (rolls a 2) …run behind me and argue that I’m cover.
DM: 15 points of electrical damage.
The DM realizes that the players are under the perception that the stairs he had drawn on the map go down. They do not. But generously he changes the layout on the fly so they do! Mrr uses Sapphire Nightmare Blade again, which everyone had forgotten she had used once before and not recovered, but she misses so no harm done. Aliarra, realizing she has only 24 HP left with 10 delayed damage incoming, picks up the electronic d6 and sets it to rolling.
Aliarra: If this thing comes up as ‘4’ the DM’s gonna kill me. (The die selects its number.) …Fuck!
Hanzo: Wow, really? Well, one-in-six chance?
DM: She’s got a pretty good chance of living the way this thing’s been rolling.
Aiden: No, when it comes to Aliarra it’ll roll all 6’s.
Aliarra: I’ll start working on my new character.
Vera: We’ll erect a memorial for you or something.
The golem detonates in a 40’ burst, hitting plenty of people. Aiden starts preparing to steal all the artifacts from Aliarra. Aliarra eats 22, Mrrshala and Vera take 11. Vera drops to -1; Aliarra slams a potion hurriedly before her delayed damage pool drops her to -8. The group wearily patches their wounds, then moves down to get the artifact they had come for.
Aliarra: It turns out to just be an amulet. “I have the Horcrux and I intend to destroy it as soon as possible, R.A.B.”
Hanzo: Motherfucker.
DM: I didn’t steal this idea… from anybody…
Aiden: You’ve reached the next level. This room looks familiar. There are now TWO golems at the end of this hall.
Hanzo: FUUUUUUUUUUUUUCK!
Given how late this game has run, it is quickly brought to a close on this climatic note!