okay, so I left some things out...
Right.
So, heres with a little bit of honesty. I have good days and I have bad days. Unforunaltly, the bad days tend to be really bad and the good days tend to be so-so. It dosent help that Ive just come out of a really bad spell of, god-is-it-over- yet!? To deal with this, and my personal resources are feeling a little thin.
But truthfully, my situation is a little bizzare, and Im just barely coming to gripps. I mean, its not every day that your boyfriend decides to move 18 hours away, to deal with some self improvement, early life crisis thing. And, yes, that is the best way that i can describe it. I havent realy got a firm grip an it myself, and my mother says that Im in denial. Perhaps I am, since I havent started to pack and hes suppose to move in a month. The trick, and this really is the tricky part, is that we havent broken up..yet. Its kind of like we break up through default in like 35 days, sort of put the end of the sentence on pause. I mean, we live together, so there is a bit of a shuffle where that is concerned, but we dont have any problems and are very much in love, so there is no need for a big dramatic exit, were Im forced to shack up on someones couch or something. But, hes leaving and that brings with it a bitersweet touch of heartache. So, I guess Im trying to get the most out of the time that we have left with each other, while also finding a new place to live and going to school and keeping sane. That in all honestly, is my life right now. He invited me to go with him, and he really wants me to go, but Im not going to. I have my own life, and Im doing well, I think. The funny part is that Im not really mad, I mean I was at first, but I truthfully kind of respect him for it. I respect his need and ambition to chase whatever is seems like he needs for his own happiness. I mean, that is like the tune Ive been singing for the majority of my life, personal independance, and now its come around and bit me in the ass.
So, heres with a little bit of honesty. I have good days and I have bad days. Unforunaltly, the bad days tend to be really bad and the good days tend to be so-so. It dosent help that Ive just come out of a really bad spell of, god-is-it-over- yet!? To deal with this, and my personal resources are feeling a little thin.
But truthfully, my situation is a little bizzare, and Im just barely coming to gripps. I mean, its not every day that your boyfriend decides to move 18 hours away, to deal with some self improvement, early life crisis thing. And, yes, that is the best way that i can describe it. I havent realy got a firm grip an it myself, and my mother says that Im in denial. Perhaps I am, since I havent started to pack and hes suppose to move in a month. The trick, and this really is the tricky part, is that we havent broken up..yet. Its kind of like we break up through default in like 35 days, sort of put the end of the sentence on pause. I mean, we live together, so there is a bit of a shuffle where that is concerned, but we dont have any problems and are very much in love, so there is no need for a big dramatic exit, were Im forced to shack up on someones couch or something. But, hes leaving and that brings with it a bitersweet touch of heartache. So, I guess Im trying to get the most out of the time that we have left with each other, while also finding a new place to live and going to school and keeping sane. That in all honestly, is my life right now. He invited me to go with him, and he really wants me to go, but Im not going to. I have my own life, and Im doing well, I think. The funny part is that Im not really mad, I mean I was at first, but I truthfully kind of respect him for it. I respect his need and ambition to chase whatever is seems like he needs for his own happiness. I mean, that is like the tune Ive been singing for the majority of my life, personal independance, and now its come around and bit me in the ass.