red pill or blue?
So, about a month ago my old pharmacy went out of business. Supposedly not a big deal, since they said they transferred all our scripts to the place down the street. Due to family issues with Crazy Uncle Bob, by the time I realized I was almost out of one of my prescriptions it was three days till they were out. Now, it wasn't one of the meds that keeps me out of the hospital or anything - no, this was just my birth control. My nice, generic - literally - birth control I've been on for five years or so. I fully admit to being the one at fault for letting it get so low - Crazy Uncle Bob had had us all running around in circles and it was my fault not writing it down somewhere to deal with.
So. This is where shit gets weird.
So, I call up the new!pharmacy and they tell me they don't have my files. I call around and finally figure out that for some reason my old pharmacy shipped my files to the same place they'd sent Himself's to, which is in a town twenty minutes away from us. Why, I still can't tell you. So, I say screw it and call up my OBGYN. I get the nurse's voice mail, leave my details, explaining everything that had happened, as well as scheduling my annual with the receptionist. The receptionist says not to worry about the voice mail and that it should be ready for me that afternoon at the pharmacy, no problems.
Now, I have a couple health-related issues with my reproductive parts. Not to mention I've got more relatives that have been arrested for murder and locked up in insane asylums than I can shake a stick at - so the fact that the crazy breeds like black mold in my genes is a rather large factor in why we currently have no kids. This is not a problem for me. I'm not exactly the sanest wet honey badger in a hemp bag, I know this. But most of my crazy is because of chemical imbalance - well, there's plenty to lay on the doorstep of my history and experiences - but for the most part the crazy I go through is because of hormones and crazy head chemicals that screw me up. I've known this since puberty. It's one of the reasons WHY my birth control is so important to me. It was a hormone stabilizer and it worked really, really well.
I should also add in that I have dealt with insomnia all my life. I have never gotten to sleep well, and have a chronic problem with waking up multiple times during the night. Again, this isn't something new, and I have medication for it. Not a problem. Right? Sure. Except when, apparently, the OBGYN changes my birth control and fucks everything up with a giant stick of WTFBBQ.
So, back to the story. I get my birth control the day after they told me it would be ready and, like a fool, didn't check the package or the labeling when I got home. (Crazy. Uncle. Bob. wtf) So, it's my fault when it's time to take the pills and realize when I take it out of the packaging that this is not my normal birth control. It's not even a different generic form of my birth control. This is something entirely new. I decide to take it anyway, since I'm at the point of no return, thinking, "hey, it's my OBGYN that I've been going to for years. They have my files. There is probably a very good reason why they called in this new script instead of my old one, right? Right?"
Right. Sure.
So, I'm expecting some bumps in the road with my mood. It's what happened the last time we went through a cycle of finding a BC that fit me. I was ready for that. I ditched my sleep medication and spaced out a couple other of my pills to make sure there would be no mixing immediately with the new BC. I figured I'll ride out the first few days of the new script and see if everything levels off.
I was not ready to sleep maybe two hours that night, two hours the next night and a grand total of an hour and a half the next. I didn't not expect the bouts of RAGE! that appeared, or the fact that I burst into tears last Saturday because Bayern Munich lost the Cup.
I. Burst. Into. Tears. I cried, off and on, the rest of the day. I was depressed for three days after. This is not normal. Also, looking back, I was flat out manic all through the game. Then, after the depression of losing passed, I went scatterbrained. Like, worse than I've been since I don't know when scatterbrained. I can't focus, I have no drive, and I've been sad at random moments. And it's not going away.
Then yesterday I had a migraine that lasted for twelve hours. It took three different medications to finally get it down to a level that didn't have me leaking tears, because crying made it worse. And to top it all off? I couldn't sleep.
For six. fucking. hours. I couldn't sleep. The migraine hit me at nine and by three in the morning I was still awake, not in tears at that point from the pain, but still. Fucking. Awake. I couldn't sleep. At all. I'd gotten maybe four hours of sleep the night before. Around four am I finally passed out, from either the double dose of pain killers or exhaustion, I'm not sure. I slept six hours. None of it consecutively.
I'm a little cranky. And I still have a headache. I haven't had a migraine like this in years. So. Come Tuesday, I will have a very, very long talk with someone in my OBGYN office and find out a way to get back onto my birth control and this ridiculousness will go the hell away.
*gets off the poor-little-me-soapbox and stomps away*
Thank all the gods above for hockey RPS (I know, okay? It doesn't make sense) and crazy/hurt/broken Tony Stark fics to get me through this.
*shuffles off holding head*
So. This is where shit gets weird.
So, I call up the new!pharmacy and they tell me they don't have my files. I call around and finally figure out that for some reason my old pharmacy shipped my files to the same place they'd sent Himself's to, which is in a town twenty minutes away from us. Why, I still can't tell you. So, I say screw it and call up my OBGYN. I get the nurse's voice mail, leave my details, explaining everything that had happened, as well as scheduling my annual with the receptionist. The receptionist says not to worry about the voice mail and that it should be ready for me that afternoon at the pharmacy, no problems.
Now, I have a couple health-related issues with my reproductive parts. Not to mention I've got more relatives that have been arrested for murder and locked up in insane asylums than I can shake a stick at - so the fact that the crazy breeds like black mold in my genes is a rather large factor in why we currently have no kids. This is not a problem for me. I'm not exactly the sanest wet honey badger in a hemp bag, I know this. But most of my crazy is because of chemical imbalance - well, there's plenty to lay on the doorstep of my history and experiences - but for the most part the crazy I go through is because of hormones and crazy head chemicals that screw me up. I've known this since puberty. It's one of the reasons WHY my birth control is so important to me. It was a hormone stabilizer and it worked really, really well.
I should also add in that I have dealt with insomnia all my life. I have never gotten to sleep well, and have a chronic problem with waking up multiple times during the night. Again, this isn't something new, and I have medication for it. Not a problem. Right? Sure. Except when, apparently, the OBGYN changes my birth control and fucks everything up with a giant stick of WTFBBQ.
So, back to the story. I get my birth control the day after they told me it would be ready and, like a fool, didn't check the package or the labeling when I got home. (Crazy. Uncle. Bob. wtf) So, it's my fault when it's time to take the pills and realize when I take it out of the packaging that this is not my normal birth control. It's not even a different generic form of my birth control. This is something entirely new. I decide to take it anyway, since I'm at the point of no return, thinking, "hey, it's my OBGYN that I've been going to for years. They have my files. There is probably a very good reason why they called in this new script instead of my old one, right? Right?"
Right. Sure.
So, I'm expecting some bumps in the road with my mood. It's what happened the last time we went through a cycle of finding a BC that fit me. I was ready for that. I ditched my sleep medication and spaced out a couple other of my pills to make sure there would be no mixing immediately with the new BC. I figured I'll ride out the first few days of the new script and see if everything levels off.
I was not ready to sleep maybe two hours that night, two hours the next night and a grand total of an hour and a half the next. I didn't not expect the bouts of RAGE! that appeared, or the fact that I burst into tears last Saturday because Bayern Munich lost the Cup.
I. Burst. Into. Tears. I cried, off and on, the rest of the day. I was depressed for three days after. This is not normal. Also, looking back, I was flat out manic all through the game. Then, after the depression of losing passed, I went scatterbrained. Like, worse than I've been since I don't know when scatterbrained. I can't focus, I have no drive, and I've been sad at random moments. And it's not going away.
Then yesterday I had a migraine that lasted for twelve hours. It took three different medications to finally get it down to a level that didn't have me leaking tears, because crying made it worse. And to top it all off? I couldn't sleep.
For six. fucking. hours. I couldn't sleep. The migraine hit me at nine and by three in the morning I was still awake, not in tears at that point from the pain, but still. Fucking. Awake. I couldn't sleep. At all. I'd gotten maybe four hours of sleep the night before. Around four am I finally passed out, from either the double dose of pain killers or exhaustion, I'm not sure. I slept six hours. None of it consecutively.
I'm a little cranky. And I still have a headache. I haven't had a migraine like this in years. So. Come Tuesday, I will have a very, very long talk with someone in my OBGYN office and find out a way to get back onto my birth control and this ridiculousness will go the hell away.
*gets off the poor-little-me-soapbox and stomps away*
Thank all the gods above for hockey RPS (I know, okay? It doesn't make sense) and crazy/hurt/broken Tony Stark fics to get me through this.
*shuffles off holding head*