(no subject)
I hate reading my thoughts out loud... it makes me think that people will think I'm crazy. It's ridiculous, but I get embarrassed. He wanted me to read him the entries from this journal that were about him. I had the hardest time doing it, and I know I blushed the entire time. I keep thinking, I'll screw up. My secrets, are my secrets. So I haven't been entirely... but do I have to be? I got hurt last time I told everything - I don't want to be hurt quite like that again. It's too hard. I invested so much of me, only to get no return at all. Not that I wouldn't do it again - I would - I think every experience of your past, is a necessary ingredient to get to the exact moment you're in. And what is this moment? I'm in an aparment... MY apartment, I'm sleeping on the carpet, next to the someone I just love. So many ways, so fast, so ... everything. It doesn't matter does it? Why feel stupid, because of what everyone else will say? Why live your life worrying about that. I just want to be me...that's all.