Can't sleep... Warning thoughts runneth over. (aka whinning)
It's kind of to the point of how uncomfortable do I need to be before anything changes.
I'm miserable because I can't hang out with my friends (in person or on-line). I feel lonely and left-out when really it's no one's fault but my own.
I'm miserable because at my job I spend the majority of it alone, on a rotating schedule and I have no way of saying "I'd like *insert day* off." Since I was caught on LJ I've been banned from that which has left a gaping hole in my social life. (Sad, I know.) I try to catch up twice a week... But frankly I hardly get to it once. So I don't feel I should bother commenting because it's.. I dunno. Weird to have someone make a point/comment days after the fact. >_<
Well.. The job is going to be history in the near future. The thing is, how near? I need to finish my course. What I'd really like to do is treat my course like my job and get it finished as quickly as possible and THEN go job hunting but my parents are throwing a hissy fit. Yes, I know it's not an option open to most people. Apparently it doesn't matter how much money I have saved because "I don't have to pay anything." Nice. But geez, if I DID have to pay I'd have a nice chunk of change to sit on until my life was in order at least... I don't understand why everything I say has to be shot down like that. It's not like I'd be the first person to put such a plan into action! *sigh* They're mad because I'm not getting anywhere in my course, but if I want to change my job so I'm on a better schedule and I can feel good about going to school...? NOOoOOoo... THAT can't happen.
I want out of Squamish... I keep thinking about how much I'd like to move to Nanaimo. I like Nanaimo and the surrounding area. I like the feel of the community and the city. Just my logical side is asking what would be better if I DID move there? No parents, no friends (Except Jenna, who will be going to school, working and may even be going to Kamloops!), higher rent, etc. etc. But at least if I had my certificate under my belt I'd be more hireable, I SHOULD be able to make enough money to live on... I hope. I don't know. It's just random thoughts right now. Trying to find something worth working towards.
On a more positive notes, my cross-stitch that I've been doing instead of reading LJ has been coming along nicely. My puppy now has a face, two ears, a leg, and most of his belly and head. Huzzah!
Also speaking of dogs it's DOG SHOW SEASON! I really want to head to the Vancouver Island Dog Fanciers Show in Saanichton for May 24-27th. Also the Nanaimo Kennel Club show for June 15-17 and, let's be greedy, the Auld Lang Show in Chilliwak May 18-21. Then I'm good until August for the Campbell River and Victoria Bay shows that come up. *nodnods* Dorothy is always inviting me to come visit her in Nanaimo, I should actually take her up on her offer.
Hey, if I get my course done and play my cards right, there's no reason why not by NEXT year's season I won't have a puppy of my own! Of course, I wouldn't be able to show until the season after that, but who cares! My own puppy! My own place! And a job that can actually support both those things! Oh. Food would be nice too. Shame if I had to starve.
Well... I'm more thinking about heading to Ontario to goto school starting Sept. 2008... But hey, positive thinking!
... I feel a bit better now. I should goto bed. I have an appointment with a naturopath in the morning. Apparently she's well-versed in PCOS and it would be nice to get my hormones back in order. Hooray for bowel movements! (She's asked me to keep track of them, fun.)
I'm miserable because I can't hang out with my friends (in person or on-line). I feel lonely and left-out when really it's no one's fault but my own.
I'm miserable because at my job I spend the majority of it alone, on a rotating schedule and I have no way of saying "I'd like *insert day* off." Since I was caught on LJ I've been banned from that which has left a gaping hole in my social life. (Sad, I know.) I try to catch up twice a week... But frankly I hardly get to it once. So I don't feel I should bother commenting because it's.. I dunno. Weird to have someone make a point/comment days after the fact. >_<
Well.. The job is going to be history in the near future. The thing is, how near? I need to finish my course. What I'd really like to do is treat my course like my job and get it finished as quickly as possible and THEN go job hunting but my parents are throwing a hissy fit. Yes, I know it's not an option open to most people. Apparently it doesn't matter how much money I have saved because "I don't have to pay anything." Nice. But geez, if I DID have to pay I'd have a nice chunk of change to sit on until my life was in order at least... I don't understand why everything I say has to be shot down like that. It's not like I'd be the first person to put such a plan into action! *sigh* They're mad because I'm not getting anywhere in my course, but if I want to change my job so I'm on a better schedule and I can feel good about going to school...? NOOoOOoo... THAT can't happen.
I want out of Squamish... I keep thinking about how much I'd like to move to Nanaimo. I like Nanaimo and the surrounding area. I like the feel of the community and the city. Just my logical side is asking what would be better if I DID move there? No parents, no friends (Except Jenna, who will be going to school, working and may even be going to Kamloops!), higher rent, etc. etc. But at least if I had my certificate under my belt I'd be more hireable, I SHOULD be able to make enough money to live on... I hope. I don't know. It's just random thoughts right now. Trying to find something worth working towards.
On a more positive notes, my cross-stitch that I've been doing instead of reading LJ has been coming along nicely. My puppy now has a face, two ears, a leg, and most of his belly and head. Huzzah!
Also speaking of dogs it's DOG SHOW SEASON! I really want to head to the Vancouver Island Dog Fanciers Show in Saanichton for May 24-27th. Also the Nanaimo Kennel Club show for June 15-17 and, let's be greedy, the Auld Lang Show in Chilliwak May 18-21. Then I'm good until August for the Campbell River and Victoria Bay shows that come up. *nodnods* Dorothy is always inviting me to come visit her in Nanaimo, I should actually take her up on her offer.
Hey, if I get my course done and play my cards right, there's no reason why not by NEXT year's season I won't have a puppy of my own! Of course, I wouldn't be able to show until the season after that, but who cares! My own puppy! My own place! And a job that can actually support both those things! Oh. Food would be nice too. Shame if I had to starve.
Well... I'm more thinking about heading to Ontario to goto school starting Sept. 2008... But hey, positive thinking!
... I feel a bit better now. I should goto bed. I have an appointment with a naturopath in the morning. Apparently she's well-versed in PCOS and it would be nice to get my hormones back in order. Hooray for bowel movements! (She's asked me to keep track of them, fun.)