Indecision.
I'm not sure what I want to do with my current deviantART page. Aside from comment threads I respond to, I've really not been putting any life into it. The last time I apparently submitted anything to it was more than two years ago. It's not like I've upped and stopped drawing or anything... I still do it all the time. But I don't think I really have anything finished that I want to put on there. Hell, I don't even know if I have ANY personal art that I've finished in all this time (that wasn't just crap done with a touch pad, at least)... most everything that I could call "done" is stuff I've done for school. I don't think it's really because art classes are sucking up my energy to draw; maybe they do a little, but... I think, in general, I just don't seem to have it together where I can take a picture or an idea and really, actually put in everything to finish it. And I really want to change that.
In the meantime, though, my dA page has essentially been left to rot. I've gone for fairly long periods without even going onto the site and checking stuff. I think I've only really popped back to any sign of life on there again because of classmates I know who also use the site. I mean, I check for updates to the people I watch, and stick my nose in places where it shouldn't go on occasion, but... that's been about it for the last two years. I don't really want to leave it this way, but... if/when I start uploading to the site again, I'm not sure I even want to upload it to that page anymore.
I mean, I made that account six years ago, when I was fourteen. I picked a pretty stupid name for it and uploaded a bunch of anime pictures that I had hand-copied from references and were not exactly new by the time I put them up. I've not really updated it much at all in all this time (I've got three, maybe four pages if you count the scraps I've put up), and... well, the majority of it is crap. And fanart. I want to get a little more serious with the stuff I put up -- possibly one of the reasons why I end up finishing things less often: the anality of a perfectionist coupled with the attention span and dedication of a gnat. But even though I'm struggling to work that dynamic out, I still want to put up something of higher quality than what I have previously. Even if it's not OHMYGAWD AMAZING, I still want to show something more worth looking at, you know?
I think I'm pretty sure of one thing at this point: at least as far as original, more serious stuff goes, I don't want to put it there. I want to put keep it on another page. I've tried this before with Sheezy and I'm not really sure it worked out. But... I kind of want to try again. I've already made a new account on dA for this purpose, actually, and picked out a name that I like. It's currently empty right now, unfortunately... has been ever since it was made. I'm guessing I should at least update it with some of the stuff I've done for classes; I do have images of a couple of those that I can put up at the current time. Other than that, it's waiting for me to get my act together and finish some of the stuff I have lying around. I don't know how long that will take.
I don't know what I'm going to do with my old account, either, for that matter. I'm not sure I want to keep using it, but I'm just as unsure about whether I should just purge it completely and start fresh with a new account for fanart. I still draw fanart quite a bit, so it's not like I'd just close the page down and not give myself a new place to put up what I like from what I've been making. And I don't really want to keep my fanart and my original art together in the same account anymore, so I definitely don't want to put it in the empty account I've got right now. Going with a new account would let me pick out a better name... but I'd also lose the feedback I've gotten on the stuff I have on there and it might be harder for everyone whom I talk to or who watches me (for whatever reason) to find me at the new location. I'd leave a journal up saying where, but... well, I guess if anyone doesn't bother checking the journal, maybe I wouldn't really be losing them at this point anyway. Probably lost them years ago.
I'm still not sure, though. Do I simply go through and hide/purge the worst of the bad stuff from my gallery and then keep using it, or do I make a new one entirely so as not to worry as much about the older stuff? ... And when am I ever going to get my ass in gear and actually finish some of the artwork I have lying around? It's not like I don't want to...
In the meantime, though, my dA page has essentially been left to rot. I've gone for fairly long periods without even going onto the site and checking stuff. I think I've only really popped back to any sign of life on there again because of classmates I know who also use the site. I mean, I check for updates to the people I watch, and stick my nose in places where it shouldn't go on occasion, but... that's been about it for the last two years. I don't really want to leave it this way, but... if/when I start uploading to the site again, I'm not sure I even want to upload it to that page anymore.
I mean, I made that account six years ago, when I was fourteen. I picked a pretty stupid name for it and uploaded a bunch of anime pictures that I had hand-copied from references and were not exactly new by the time I put them up. I've not really updated it much at all in all this time (I've got three, maybe four pages if you count the scraps I've put up), and... well, the majority of it is crap. And fanart. I want to get a little more serious with the stuff I put up -- possibly one of the reasons why I end up finishing things less often: the anality of a perfectionist coupled with the attention span and dedication of a gnat. But even though I'm struggling to work that dynamic out, I still want to put up something of higher quality than what I have previously. Even if it's not OHMYGAWD AMAZING, I still want to show something more worth looking at, you know?
I think I'm pretty sure of one thing at this point: at least as far as original, more serious stuff goes, I don't want to put it there. I want to put keep it on another page. I've tried this before with Sheezy and I'm not really sure it worked out. But... I kind of want to try again. I've already made a new account on dA for this purpose, actually, and picked out a name that I like. It's currently empty right now, unfortunately... has been ever since it was made. I'm guessing I should at least update it with some of the stuff I've done for classes; I do have images of a couple of those that I can put up at the current time. Other than that, it's waiting for me to get my act together and finish some of the stuff I have lying around. I don't know how long that will take.
I don't know what I'm going to do with my old account, either, for that matter. I'm not sure I want to keep using it, but I'm just as unsure about whether I should just purge it completely and start fresh with a new account for fanart. I still draw fanart quite a bit, so it's not like I'd just close the page down and not give myself a new place to put up what I like from what I've been making. And I don't really want to keep my fanart and my original art together in the same account anymore, so I definitely don't want to put it in the empty account I've got right now. Going with a new account would let me pick out a better name... but I'd also lose the feedback I've gotten on the stuff I have on there and it might be harder for everyone whom I talk to or who watches me (for whatever reason) to find me at the new location. I'd leave a journal up saying where, but... well, I guess if anyone doesn't bother checking the journal, maybe I wouldn't really be losing them at this point anyway. Probably lost them years ago.
I'm still not sure, though. Do I simply go through and hide/purge the worst of the bad stuff from my gallery and then keep using it, or do I make a new one entirely so as not to worry as much about the older stuff? ... And when am I ever going to get my ass in gear and actually finish some of the artwork I have lying around? It's not like I don't want to...