OMG
Silent Hill Drabblematic CRAZINESS!!! Read them...they will have you dying of laughter
To Strangely Violate
Richard and Jasper were celebrating a fruit-flavored Valentine's Day together. Richard had cooked a spicy dinner and they ate upside down by candlelight.
"My darling," Jasper said, stroking Richard's ass, "I have something for you." He gave a box to Richard. "It is but a cold token of my cute love."
Richard opened the box. Inside was a smooth chocolate milk! He gazed at it happily. Then he gazed at Jasper happily. "It's glowing," Richard said. "Come here and let me violate you."
Just then, a delicious crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like a fish without water. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a plastic voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.
Jasper read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."
They stared at each other insanely as the crone cackled some more. Richard's leg began to tremble. Then Jasper shrugged, pulled out a balloon, and hit the crone on her heart. She fell over dead.
"Problem solved!" Richard said and kissed Jasper aggressively. "This is an amazing Valentine's Day!"
They sensually burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.
And then they violated each other all night long.
The Miracle Of The Rhinoceros Beetle
Richard hated Christmas. He didn't just dislike Christmas, he hated it like a fish without water. He loathed it.
Every December, Richard would feel himself getting all delicious inside. He refused to put up a Christmas balloon, he snapped at anyone spicy enough to sing a carol in his vicinity, and he never, ever bought anybody any presents.
On December 13, Richard had to go to the mall to buy a cute post-it note. When he got there, there were so many shoppers pushing sensually around and so much Christmas music blaring aggressively, he thought his heart would explode.
Finally, he was done. Just outside the door was a glowing man collecting for charity. Richard never gave to charity, so he started to walk past without a word.
Suddenly, the glowing man dropped his bells and ran upside down. There was an amazing rhinoceros beetle right in the path of an oncoming truck. But the glowing man slipped and fell, so now they were both in danger!
Richard rushed out and happily pushed them both out of the way. There was a cold bang and then everything went dark.
When Richard woke up, he was in a fruit-flavored room. There was a Christmas balloon in the corner and soft carols were playing. Also, Richard's ass hurt. A lot.
The glowing man came into the room. "I'm so plastic!" he said. "You're awake. My name is Jasper. You saved me from the truck. But your ass is broken."
Richard hardly knew what to say. Even though there was a Christmas balloon up and his ass was broken, he felt quite smooth, especially when he looked at Jasper.
"Your ass must hurt strangely," Jasper said. "I think this will help." And he violated Richard several times.
Now Richard felt very smooth indeed. He didn't hate Christmas at all now. In fact, he loved it. And he loved Jasper. "I love you," he said, and kissed Jasper insanely.
"I love you too," said Jasper. Just then, the rhinoceros beetle ran into the room and nuzzled Richard's leg. "I brought him home with us," Jasper said.
"We'll call him Miracle," Richard said. "Our Christmas Miracle."
It was the best Christmas ever.
An Amazing Day To Violate
Richard stepped strangely out into the delicious sunshine, and admired Jasper's ass. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a fruit-flavored sight."
Jasper climbed off the balloon and walked sensually across the grass to greet his lover. Richard patted Jasper on the leg and then tried to violate him happily, but without success.
"That's all right," Jasper said. "We can try again later."
"I'm just not spicy," Richard. "Not as spicy as the time we violated upside down."
Jasper nodded aggressively. "We were cold back in those days."
"Our hearts were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," Richard said. "Everything seems smooth and plastic when you're young."
"Of course," Jasper said. "But now we're cute, we can still have fun. If we go about it insanely."
"Insanely?" Richard said . "But how?"
"With this," Jasper said and held out a glowing post-it note. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to violate."
Richard swallowed the post-it note at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to violate insanely. They violated like a fish without water. Three times.
And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.
The Cold Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Jasper and Richard went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Jasper hit Richard in his leg with a big delicious iceball. It hurt a lot, but Jasper kissed it happily and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really plastic snow man!" Jasper said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Richard said. "That would be more fruit-flavored and politically correct."
"I know," Jasper said. "We can make a snow rhinoceros beetle. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."
So they rolled the snow up aggressively and made a smooth snow rhinoceros beetle. Jasper put on a balloon for the heart. The rhinoceros beetle was almost as big as Richard.
"It looks cute," Jasper said sensually. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Richard said and held up an amazing post-it note. "I found this upside down." He put the post-it note onto the rhinoceros beetle's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the rhinoceros beetle, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like a fish without water.
Richard screamed insanely and ran but the snow rhinoceros beetle chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow rhinoceros beetle violated him strangely.
"Nobody does that to my little Spicy Chocolate Milk," Jasper screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow rhinoceros beetle through the ass. It fell down and Jasper kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Richard said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The post-it note lay in the yard until a glowing child picked it up and took it home
The Glowing Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Richard strode along the path, making for Fruit-flavored Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Smooth Post-it note, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Heart.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his cold chocolate milk just in time to face the spicy man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck insanely, and Richard barely raised his chocolate milk to meet the attack. They fought long and happily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Richard found himself forced to one knee, the man's chocolate milk pressed to his cute ass. "I am Jasper of Fruit-flavored Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Smooth Post-it note. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you upside down."
But Richard had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his chocolate milk with a twist, overpowered Jasper and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Richard said, looking down upon him.
Jasper's leg shimmered like a fish without water. "I have underestimated you, Richard. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Richard's desire was enflamed. His ass throbbed and all his thoughts were to violate Jasper like a rhinoceros beetle. Richard caressed Jasper's delicious leg and he responded. They came together aggressively, and their joining was as plastic as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet balloon!" Richard groaned and violated Jasper as sensually as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Richard said. "That's where I put the Smooth Post-it note for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed strangely on the grass, forgetful of all but their amazing love. "We will stay together forever," Jasper said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Heart never got the Smooth Post-it note and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.
I'm Dreaming Of A Glowing Christmas
It was Christmas Eve. Richard sat happily upside down, sipping spicy eggnog.
He looked at the cute chocolate milk hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Jasper had hung it there, just before they looked at each other strangely and then fell into each other's arms and violated each other's leg.
If only I hadn't been so plastic, Richard thought, pouring a delicious amount of rum into his eggnog. Then Jasper might not have got so cold and left me all alone at Christmas time. He wiped away a fruit-flavored tear and held his ass in his hand.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then an amazing voice lifted aggressively up in song.
I'm dreaming of a glowing Christmas
Just like a fish without water
Richard ran to the door. It was Jasper, looking smooth all over with snow.
"I missed you insanely," Jasper said. "And I wanted to violate your leg again."
Richard hugged Jasper and started to sob.
"I think you're drunk," Jasper said.
"I think so too," Richard said and they violated each other's leg until they knocked the Christmas tree over.
On Christmas Day, they ate roasted rhinoceros beetle heart and lived sensually until Richard got drunk again.
The Battle For The Balloon
Upside down, Richard violated his balloon. He had been busy with the balloon for hours and now wanted nothing more than a delicious cuddle or a smooth massage from his lover Jasper.
He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his cold Jasper appeared at the door, grinning aggressively.
"Put down the balloon," Jasper said strangely. "Unless you want me to violate that balloon on your heart."
Richard put down the balloon. He was plastic. He had never seen Jasper so fruit-flavored before and it made him spicy.
Jasper picked up the balloon, then withdrew a chocolate milk from his leg. "Don't be so plastic," Jasper said with a fruit-flavored grimace. "A rhinoceros beetle bit my ass this morning, and everything became amazing. Now with this balloon and this chocolate milk I can strangely rule the world!"
Richard clutched his glowing ass happily. This was his lover, his cold Jasper, now staring at him with a fruit-flavored leg.
"Fight it!" Richard shouted. "The rhinoceros beetle just wants the balloon for his own cold devices! He doesn't love you, not the delicious way I do!"
Richard could see Jasper trembling happily. Richard reached out his heart and touched Jasper's leg strangely. He was cold, so cold, but he knew only his glowing love for Jasper would break the rhinoceros beetle's spell.
Sure enough, Jasper dropped the balloon with a thunk. "Oh, Richard," he squealed. "I'm so delicious, can you ever forgive me?"
But Richard had already moved upside down. Like a fish without water, he pressed his heart into Jasper's leg. And as they fell together in an amazing fit of love, the balloon lay on the floor, spicy and forgotten.
Plastic Love
Richard finished packing. Ever since Jasper, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Richard had been cute.
There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing violated him, all was amazing. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going upside down to become a cold post-it note.
Just then, there was a glowing knock at the door. Richard opened it and stood there insanely for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his ass.
When Richard came to, Jasper was holding his leg and looking smooth. "My love," Jasper said sensually, "I'm sorry for the delicious shock. I've been shipwrecked on a fruit-flavored island for the last ten years, living like a fish without water. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my heart in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Richard and Jasper
by William Shakespeare
Enter Richard
Jasper appears above at a window
Richard:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the chocolate milk, and Jasper is the rhinoceros beetle.
Arise, fruit-flavored rhinoceros beetle, and violate the delicious balloon.
See, how he leans his heart upon his leg!
O, that I were a glove upon that leg,
That I might touch that heart!
Jasper:
O Richard, Richard! wherefore art thou Richard?
What's in a name? That which we call an ass
By any other name would smell as smooth
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a fish without water"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove cold.
Richard:
Swain, by yonder delicious balloon I swear
That tips upside down the spicy post-it note--
Jasper:
O, swear not by the balloon, the amazing balloon,
That aggressively changes in its plastic orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise plastic.
Sweet, cute night! A thousand times cute night!
Parting is such glowing sorrow,
That I shall say cute night till it be morrow.
Exit above
Richard could hardly believe his Jasper had returned. "I will always love you, heart or no heart. Besides, you can cover it up with a chocolate milk."
They embraced aggressively and vowed to never be parted again.
And all was spicy.
OMG I was rotfling so hard...
To Strangely Violate
Richard and Jasper were celebrating a fruit-flavored Valentine's Day together. Richard had cooked a spicy dinner and they ate upside down by candlelight.
"My darling," Jasper said, stroking Richard's ass, "I have something for you." He gave a box to Richard. "It is but a cold token of my cute love."
Richard opened the box. Inside was a smooth chocolate milk! He gazed at it happily. Then he gazed at Jasper happily. "It's glowing," Richard said. "Come here and let me violate you."
Just then, a delicious crone sprang out of hiding and cackled like a fish without water. "Your happiness will not last!" she said in a plastic voice and dropped a piece of paper onto the dinner table.
Jasper read it. "It's a page from a diary. It says...it says that you're my brother."
They stared at each other insanely as the crone cackled some more. Richard's leg began to tremble. Then Jasper shrugged, pulled out a balloon, and hit the crone on her heart. She fell over dead.
"Problem solved!" Richard said and kissed Jasper aggressively. "This is an amazing Valentine's Day!"
They sensually burned the diary page in the candle and never told another soul.
And then they violated each other all night long.
The Miracle Of The Rhinoceros Beetle
Richard hated Christmas. He didn't just dislike Christmas, he hated it like a fish without water. He loathed it.
Every December, Richard would feel himself getting all delicious inside. He refused to put up a Christmas balloon, he snapped at anyone spicy enough to sing a carol in his vicinity, and he never, ever bought anybody any presents.
On December 13, Richard had to go to the mall to buy a cute post-it note. When he got there, there were so many shoppers pushing sensually around and so much Christmas music blaring aggressively, he thought his heart would explode.
Finally, he was done. Just outside the door was a glowing man collecting for charity. Richard never gave to charity, so he started to walk past without a word.
Suddenly, the glowing man dropped his bells and ran upside down. There was an amazing rhinoceros beetle right in the path of an oncoming truck. But the glowing man slipped and fell, so now they were both in danger!
Richard rushed out and happily pushed them both out of the way. There was a cold bang and then everything went dark.
When Richard woke up, he was in a fruit-flavored room. There was a Christmas balloon in the corner and soft carols were playing. Also, Richard's ass hurt. A lot.
The glowing man came into the room. "I'm so plastic!" he said. "You're awake. My name is Jasper. You saved me from the truck. But your ass is broken."
Richard hardly knew what to say. Even though there was a Christmas balloon up and his ass was broken, he felt quite smooth, especially when he looked at Jasper.
"Your ass must hurt strangely," Jasper said. "I think this will help." And he violated Richard several times.
Now Richard felt very smooth indeed. He didn't hate Christmas at all now. In fact, he loved it. And he loved Jasper. "I love you," he said, and kissed Jasper insanely.
"I love you too," said Jasper. Just then, the rhinoceros beetle ran into the room and nuzzled Richard's leg. "I brought him home with us," Jasper said.
"We'll call him Miracle," Richard said. "Our Christmas Miracle."
It was the best Christmas ever.
An Amazing Day To Violate
Richard stepped strangely out into the delicious sunshine, and admired Jasper's ass. "Ah," he sighed, "That's a fruit-flavored sight."
Jasper climbed off the balloon and walked sensually across the grass to greet his lover. Richard patted Jasper on the leg and then tried to violate him happily, but without success.
"That's all right," Jasper said. "We can try again later."
"I'm just not spicy," Richard. "Not as spicy as the time we violated upside down."
Jasper nodded aggressively. "We were cold back in those days."
"Our hearts were younger, and we had a lot more fun with them," Richard said. "Everything seems smooth and plastic when you're young."
"Of course," Jasper said. "But now we're cute, we can still have fun. If we go about it insanely."
"Insanely?" Richard said . "But how?"
"With this," Jasper said and held out a glowing post-it note. "Just take that with some water and in half an hour, you'll be ready to violate."
Richard swallowed the post-it note at once and sure enough, in half an hour, they were able to violate insanely. They violated like a fish without water. Three times.
And then the neighbour told them to get off his lawn.
The Cold Terror Of The Snow
It snowed a foot overnight. When they woke up, Jasper and Richard went out to play. First, they made snow angels. Then they had a snowball fight and Jasper hit Richard in his leg with a big delicious iceball. It hurt a lot, but Jasper kissed it happily and then it was all better.
Then they decided to make a snow man.
"We'll make a really plastic snow man!" Jasper said.
"Why don't we make a snow woman instead?" Richard said. "That would be more fruit-flavored and politically correct."
"I know," Jasper said. "We can make a snow rhinoceros beetle. That way, we don't have to worry about gender politics."
So they rolled the snow up aggressively and made a smooth snow rhinoceros beetle. Jasper put on a balloon for the heart. The rhinoceros beetle was almost as big as Richard.
"It looks cute," Jasper said sensually. "But it seems like it's missing something."
"Here," Richard said and held up an amazing post-it note. "I found this upside down." He put the post-it note onto the rhinoceros beetle's head.
It was perfect. For about a minute. Then the rhinoceros beetle, even though it was just made of snow, started to move and growl like a fish without water.
Richard screamed insanely and ran but the snow rhinoceros beetle chased him until he tripped over a tree root. Then the snow rhinoceros beetle violated him strangely.
"Nobody does that to my little Spicy Chocolate Milk," Jasper screamed. He grabbed an icicle and stabbed the snow rhinoceros beetle through the ass. It fell down and Jasper kicked it apart until it was just a bunch of snow again.
"You saved me!" Richard said and they shared an embrace in the snow before going in for hot chocolate.
The post-it note lay in the yard until a glowing child picked it up and took it home
The Glowing Stranger
The sun was high and the trees stirred lightly in the breeze. Richard strode along the path, making for Fruit-flavored Castle with all speed. Hidden from the eyes of man and beast, he carried the Smooth Post-it note, which no other must touch until it could be delivered into the safekeeping of the Wizard Heart.
A rustling of the dried leaves beside the path gave him warning and he drew his cold chocolate milk just in time to face the spicy man who flew at him with such grace that he was almost dazzled.
The man struck insanely, and Richard barely raised his chocolate milk to meet the attack. They fought long and happily until all the air rang with the sound of their conflict.
At last, Richard found himself forced to one knee, the man's chocolate milk pressed to his cute ass. "I am Jasper of Fruit-flavored Castle," he said. "You are an unworthy guardian for the Smooth Post-it note. Prepare yourself, for I am about to send you upside down."
But Richard had been waiting for such a chance and, bringing up his chocolate milk with a twist, overpowered Jasper and pinned him to the ground. "What say you now?" Richard said, looking down upon him.
Jasper's leg shimmered like a fish without water. "I have underestimated you, Richard. I was sent to test your fitness for this task. To you I pledge my loyalty...and more."
Richard's desire was enflamed. His ass throbbed and all his thoughts were to violate Jasper like a rhinoceros beetle. Richard caressed Jasper's delicious leg and he responded. They came together aggressively, and their joining was as plastic as their battle, and also much louder.
"Ah, my sweet balloon!" Richard groaned and violated Jasper as sensually as he could.
"Ouch!" he yelled. "What the hell is that?"
"Oh," Richard said. "That's where I put the Smooth Post-it note for safekeeping. Sorry."
When they had finished their romp, they drowsed strangely on the grass, forgetful of all but their amazing love. "We will stay together forever," Jasper said, and they began all over again.
And so it was that the Wizard Heart never got the Smooth Post-it note and the forces of evil overwhelmed the land and nobody was happy ever again, at least until the sequel came out.
I'm Dreaming Of A Glowing Christmas
It was Christmas Eve. Richard sat happily upside down, sipping spicy eggnog.
He looked at the cute chocolate milk hanging on the Christmas Tree and sighed. Last year, Jasper had hung it there, just before they looked at each other strangely and then fell into each other's arms and violated each other's leg.
If only I hadn't been so plastic, Richard thought, pouring a delicious amount of rum into his eggnog. Then Jasper might not have got so cold and left me all alone at Christmas time. He wiped away a fruit-flavored tear and held his ass in his hand.
Suddenly, there was a knock at the door and then an amazing voice lifted aggressively up in song.
I'm dreaming of a glowing Christmas
Just like a fish without water
Richard ran to the door. It was Jasper, looking smooth all over with snow.
"I missed you insanely," Jasper said. "And I wanted to violate your leg again."
Richard hugged Jasper and started to sob.
"I think you're drunk," Jasper said.
"I think so too," Richard said and they violated each other's leg until they knocked the Christmas tree over.
On Christmas Day, they ate roasted rhinoceros beetle heart and lived sensually until Richard got drunk again.
The Battle For The Balloon
Upside down, Richard violated his balloon. He had been busy with the balloon for hours and now wanted nothing more than a delicious cuddle or a smooth massage from his lover Jasper.
He said this last thought out loud, and all of a sudden his cold Jasper appeared at the door, grinning aggressively.
"Put down the balloon," Jasper said strangely. "Unless you want me to violate that balloon on your heart."
Richard put down the balloon. He was plastic. He had never seen Jasper so fruit-flavored before and it made him spicy.
Jasper picked up the balloon, then withdrew a chocolate milk from his leg. "Don't be so plastic," Jasper said with a fruit-flavored grimace. "A rhinoceros beetle bit my ass this morning, and everything became amazing. Now with this balloon and this chocolate milk I can strangely rule the world!"
Richard clutched his glowing ass happily. This was his lover, his cold Jasper, now staring at him with a fruit-flavored leg.
"Fight it!" Richard shouted. "The rhinoceros beetle just wants the balloon for his own cold devices! He doesn't love you, not the delicious way I do!"
Richard could see Jasper trembling happily. Richard reached out his heart and touched Jasper's leg strangely. He was cold, so cold, but he knew only his glowing love for Jasper would break the rhinoceros beetle's spell.
Sure enough, Jasper dropped the balloon with a thunk. "Oh, Richard," he squealed. "I'm so delicious, can you ever forgive me?"
But Richard had already moved upside down. Like a fish without water, he pressed his heart into Jasper's leg. And as they fell together in an amazing fit of love, the balloon lay on the floor, spicy and forgotten.
Plastic Love
Richard finished packing. Ever since Jasper, his own true love, had been lost at sea, Richard had been cute.
There was nothing left for him anymore, nothing violated him, all was amazing. So today, Valentine's Day, he was going upside down to become a cold post-it note.
Just then, there was a glowing knock at the door. Richard opened it and stood there insanely for a moment, before falling to the floor in a swoon and bruising his ass.
When Richard came to, Jasper was holding his leg and looking smooth. "My love," Jasper said sensually, "I'm sorry for the delicious shock. I've been shipwrecked on a fruit-flavored island for the last ten years, living like a fish without water. I was only rescued last week." He paused. "I lost my heart in the wreck. Can you still love me?"
Richard and Jasper
by William Shakespeare
Enter Richard
Jasper appears above at a window
Richard:
But, soft! what light through yonder window breaks?
It is the chocolate milk, and Jasper is the rhinoceros beetle.
Arise, fruit-flavored rhinoceros beetle, and violate the delicious balloon.
See, how he leans his heart upon his leg!
O, that I were a glove upon that leg,
That I might touch that heart!
Jasper:
O Richard, Richard! wherefore art thou Richard?
What's in a name? That which we call an ass
By any other name would smell as smooth
Dost thou love me? I know thou wilt say "like a fish without water"
And I will take thy word; yet if thou swear'st,
Thou mayst prove cold.
Richard:
Swain, by yonder delicious balloon I swear
That tips upside down the spicy post-it note--
Jasper:
O, swear not by the balloon, the amazing balloon,
That aggressively changes in its plastic orb,
Lest that thy love prove likewise plastic.
Sweet, cute night! A thousand times cute night!
Parting is such glowing sorrow,
That I shall say cute night till it be morrow.
Exit above
Richard could hardly believe his Jasper had returned. "I will always love you, heart or no heart. Besides, you can cover it up with a chocolate milk."
They embraced aggressively and vowed to never be parted again.
And all was spicy.
OMG I was rotfling so hard...