RANT: I hate people.. OR People take IRC too seriously.
I hate it when I have something all planned out in my head, but then can’t remember what I was planning to say when I come to typing it up. This is the case with what I am writing today, so if it isn’t interesting or sounds jumbled, forgive me.
The main point of this rant is to tell you, my faithful readers (are there any) about the events of last night. That is, the events that happened * after * my incredibly long blog was written. But first, because I think it is slightly related, I want to describe a different event. Both of these events go to show how much people take minor things seriously. I just wanna shout out and tell people that IRC IS NOT REALITY. Ok, so most of my friends are on IRC, and I love talking to them, and confiding in them. But these aren’t like my real friends. They are a subset of friends that I spend a lot of time with but don’t really know. I have pictures in my head of what they are like.. but I have no idea if these pictures are real. They are just a fantasy based on the image that real life people choose to put across on IRC. My image on IRC is very different from that in real life. Yes, it’s me, but it’s not the me that real people know. It’s the me that I choose not to let out in real life. It’s the mean me, the courageous me, the occasionally deep and profound me. Not the shy, boring, roleplaying wannabe-geek that I really am.
And so on to event number one. This event happened a few weeks ago, but stems back to practically the start of my time on IRC, which scarily enough is almost a year ago now. The was this woman on IRC who craved attention. Ok, so most of us on IRC crave attention.. but there are subtle ways of getting that attention. And most of us don’t mind if we don’t always get it. She was different. She was an outrageous flirt who liked being the centre of attention. She would come in various private channels of people she was friends with, and say hi. If she didn’t get an answer within a short period of time. She would get huffy and would often leave. If she found herself in the middle of a conversation which didn’t abruptly turn to her, she would try to turn the conversation her way, then leave. I often said hi to her when nothing was happening, but because she didn’t really engage me in a conversation (what was there to say, for heavens sake, we have nothing in common, and I barely know her) I wouldn’t put in a helluva lot of effort into making conversation with her. Then she would, characteristically, up and leave.
A short while ago she started turning up in our public channel again and at first things were ok. This was during the copter game fad and since she got into the game too, we had lots to talk about. Then the fad died down. Finally she came in and because no-one spoke to her she “went and sat in the corner”. At this another member of the channel “put a bag over her head”, basically, pointing out that the channel member didn’t care about the attention seeking. At which point she started having a go. I was ignoring the whole situation, until she private messaged me and started complaining. Now I was better friends with the other person, although not close to either. I spent the next 5 minutes or so trying to point out it was IRC. Not to take it seriously. None of us are “real” friends.. so don’t let it bother her. She threatened to leave the channel, so very bluntly I just turned around and said “It’s your choice”. Which seems to have got her off my back, for good. But why, oh why, did she have to take it so seriously.
Now on to the purpose of that Rant.. which by the way was posted a day late.
So the events I am about to tell you about are from the day before yesterday, not last night.
It starts off with two friends, whom I shall call F and M, from a certain IRC channel that I am founder of. F is a female, M a male.
Now, firstly to set the scene. M fancies F. F doesn't want a relationship and likes M as a friend. F has made this clear to M. M doesn't seem to get the idea and flirts even though he knows F doesn't like it.
I have tried to not take sides, because both are my friends. Well.. both WERE my friends.
Two nights ago M started talking to me and asking me for help with something. I was quite short with him because (a) he was distracting me from a conversation, (b) I wanted him to learn for himself, and (c) I knew he had done the thing in question several times before.
So.. suddenly.. I turn round and look at my monitor and he's having a go at me for being short with him, saying I'm taking sides, and claiming that F won't be around for ever and he will be. ARGH!! Maybe if he'd actually asked why I was being short, rather than guessing, the argument would never have happened. I was never taking sides, just for the record, and personally it doesn't bother me if F and M are around forever, or never again. Yes, I'll miss them both, but I have enough virtual friends that it doesn't make a whole lot of difference. Plus, the fact that I've met F and not M, means I've more chance of keeping in contact with her than him.
Anyway, later, I op F in my channel. It was coming a long time anyway, although maybe it was badly timed, because shortly after M turns up and makes comments about there being lots of ops and him. He's not an op because I'm not as friendly with him, and his complaining about his fight with F all the time is pissing me off.
I explain this to him in pm, after he calls me insensitive and stuff. And he twists my words suggesting that he's not op'd because I'm taking sides. He should know me enough by now that I don't take sides.. but he doesn't. He's much older than me, but he's very childish, and takes IRC too seriously.
No matter how much I explain, he doesn't believe me. Then I go on to say how I only op people who I trust and who are loyal to me, etc. So he turns round and says I'm not a Goddess. As though I don't have the right to make those decisions in MY channel. The point of being a founder is that you only op people you trust!!! Does he not get this!
So, I say, yes.. I am a Goddess (do /chanserv info #draconidslair on DALnet for proof of this). At least, I am in my channel. And he keeps going on and on as though I don't have a right to make those decisions. As though DALnet is suddenly some democracy where everyone has a say in any channel they happen to go into.
So, finally I akick and ignore him, because I really don't need the hassle right now with all the stress I have. And he memos me saying: " NOTICE from MemoServ [service@dal.net]: wow! what a chidish person you are!...banning me from YOUR chan...lol no wonder no-one likes you in #wales ..bye" So now I ask.. how is it childish to ban someone from MY chan (notice he emphasises that it's my chan)? Would it be equally childish if I banned a lamer? Oh, and the comment that no-one likes me in #wales isn't true. I have had a run-in with one person, and he knows this. He's just trying to hurt me. And I don't give a fuck about #wales anymore anyway.
So.. that was the Rant. I don't understand why people take things so seriously. I don't understand why people thing IRC is real life. I spend most of my free time on IRC.. but still it IS NOT REAL! Otherwise would I be going around saying I'm a blue dragon, would I be sharpening my claws? Yes? Really?
Friendships are fragile. Even more so on IRC. People shouldn't take them seriously because then they'll get hurt. Hurt by words on a computer. If that is how you live your life, trusting in words on a computer, you really need to rethink you're life. By all means, make friends online, but don't take offence if things don't go well between you,and don't take it too seriously.
THE INTERNET IS NOT REAL LIFE!
The main point of this rant is to tell you, my faithful readers (are there any) about the events of last night. That is, the events that happened * after * my incredibly long blog was written. But first, because I think it is slightly related, I want to describe a different event. Both of these events go to show how much people take minor things seriously. I just wanna shout out and tell people that IRC IS NOT REALITY. Ok, so most of my friends are on IRC, and I love talking to them, and confiding in them. But these aren’t like my real friends. They are a subset of friends that I spend a lot of time with but don’t really know. I have pictures in my head of what they are like.. but I have no idea if these pictures are real. They are just a fantasy based on the image that real life people choose to put across on IRC. My image on IRC is very different from that in real life. Yes, it’s me, but it’s not the me that real people know. It’s the me that I choose not to let out in real life. It’s the mean me, the courageous me, the occasionally deep and profound me. Not the shy, boring, roleplaying wannabe-geek that I really am.
And so on to event number one. This event happened a few weeks ago, but stems back to practically the start of my time on IRC, which scarily enough is almost a year ago now. The was this woman on IRC who craved attention. Ok, so most of us on IRC crave attention.. but there are subtle ways of getting that attention. And most of us don’t mind if we don’t always get it. She was different. She was an outrageous flirt who liked being the centre of attention. She would come in various private channels of people she was friends with, and say hi. If she didn’t get an answer within a short period of time. She would get huffy and would often leave. If she found herself in the middle of a conversation which didn’t abruptly turn to her, she would try to turn the conversation her way, then leave. I often said hi to her when nothing was happening, but because she didn’t really engage me in a conversation (what was there to say, for heavens sake, we have nothing in common, and I barely know her) I wouldn’t put in a helluva lot of effort into making conversation with her. Then she would, characteristically, up and leave.
A short while ago she started turning up in our public channel again and at first things were ok. This was during the copter game fad and since she got into the game too, we had lots to talk about. Then the fad died down. Finally she came in and because no-one spoke to her she “went and sat in the corner”. At this another member of the channel “put a bag over her head”, basically, pointing out that the channel member didn’t care about the attention seeking. At which point she started having a go. I was ignoring the whole situation, until she private messaged me and started complaining. Now I was better friends with the other person, although not close to either. I spent the next 5 minutes or so trying to point out it was IRC. Not to take it seriously. None of us are “real” friends.. so don’t let it bother her. She threatened to leave the channel, so very bluntly I just turned around and said “It’s your choice”. Which seems to have got her off my back, for good. But why, oh why, did she have to take it so seriously.
Now on to the purpose of that Rant.. which by the way was posted a day late.
So the events I am about to tell you about are from the day before yesterday, not last night.
It starts off with two friends, whom I shall call F and M, from a certain IRC channel that I am founder of. F is a female, M a male.
Now, firstly to set the scene. M fancies F. F doesn't want a relationship and likes M as a friend. F has made this clear to M. M doesn't seem to get the idea and flirts even though he knows F doesn't like it.
I have tried to not take sides, because both are my friends. Well.. both WERE my friends.
Two nights ago M started talking to me and asking me for help with something. I was quite short with him because (a) he was distracting me from a conversation, (b) I wanted him to learn for himself, and (c) I knew he had done the thing in question several times before.
So.. suddenly.. I turn round and look at my monitor and he's having a go at me for being short with him, saying I'm taking sides, and claiming that F won't be around for ever and he will be. ARGH!! Maybe if he'd actually asked why I was being short, rather than guessing, the argument would never have happened. I was never taking sides, just for the record, and personally it doesn't bother me if F and M are around forever, or never again. Yes, I'll miss them both, but I have enough virtual friends that it doesn't make a whole lot of difference. Plus, the fact that I've met F and not M, means I've more chance of keeping in contact with her than him.
Anyway, later, I op F in my channel. It was coming a long time anyway, although maybe it was badly timed, because shortly after M turns up and makes comments about there being lots of ops and him. He's not an op because I'm not as friendly with him, and his complaining about his fight with F all the time is pissing me off.
I explain this to him in pm, after he calls me insensitive and stuff. And he twists my words suggesting that he's not op'd because I'm taking sides. He should know me enough by now that I don't take sides.. but he doesn't. He's much older than me, but he's very childish, and takes IRC too seriously.
No matter how much I explain, he doesn't believe me. Then I go on to say how I only op people who I trust and who are loyal to me, etc. So he turns round and says I'm not a Goddess. As though I don't have the right to make those decisions in MY channel. The point of being a founder is that you only op people you trust!!! Does he not get this!
So, I say, yes.. I am a Goddess (do /chanserv info #draconidslair on DALnet for proof of this). At least, I am in my channel. And he keeps going on and on as though I don't have a right to make those decisions. As though DALnet is suddenly some democracy where everyone has a say in any channel they happen to go into.
So, finally I akick and ignore him, because I really don't need the hassle right now with all the stress I have. And he memos me saying: " NOTICE from MemoServ [service@dal.net]: wow! what a chidish person you are!...banning me from YOUR chan...lol no wonder no-one likes you in #wales ..bye" So now I ask.. how is it childish to ban someone from MY chan (notice he emphasises that it's my chan)? Would it be equally childish if I banned a lamer? Oh, and the comment that no-one likes me in #wales isn't true. I have had a run-in with one person, and he knows this. He's just trying to hurt me. And I don't give a fuck about #wales anymore anyway.
So.. that was the Rant. I don't understand why people take things so seriously. I don't understand why people thing IRC is real life. I spend most of my free time on IRC.. but still it IS NOT REAL! Otherwise would I be going around saying I'm a blue dragon, would I be sharpening my claws? Yes? Really?
Friendships are fragile. Even more so on IRC. People shouldn't take them seriously because then they'll get hurt. Hurt by words on a computer. If that is how you live your life, trusting in words on a computer, you really need to rethink you're life. By all means, make friends online, but don't take offence if things don't go well between you,and don't take it too seriously.
THE INTERNET IS NOT REAL LIFE!