Black Family Movie Night
Title: Black Family Movie Night
Rating: PG 13
Word Count: 850
Warning(s): Non canon compliant, alive!Sirius
Summary: Harry takes his family out for a movie, with disastrous consequences.
Author's notes: Super quick job for dove_drabbles October prompt: Whisper in the dark.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. This was written for fun, not profit.
In hindsight, Harry admitted that Black Family movie night was not one of his best ideas. It had seemed like fun at the time; going to the movies with Teddy, Sirius and Draco. Now however, he wasn't so sure...
Crunch.
Crunch. Crunch.
Crunch!
Well, at least Draco was enjoying his popcorn. Harry winced at the racket his boyfriend was making, fastidiously ignored the glowering woman seated right behind him and tried his best concentrate on the movie.
Things had taken a bad turn for the little clownfish. He had been captured by divers and if his father didn’t get to him in time, that awful little girl with the monster braces would take him away. Harry tried not to sigh at the unfairness of it all.
Teddy sure knew how to pick a tearjerker of a film, that’s for sure.
Speaking of Teddy…
“Harry! Psst, Harry!”
Harry started a little at his godson's urgent whisper. “What is it, Ted?” he asked, leaning over the fidgety little boy. Teddy shuffled uncomfortably in his seat. “I have to go,” he whispered back.
Harry groaned. “Now? I told you to go to the loo before the film started.”
“I didn’t have to go then.”
“Shh!” the woman behind them hissed indignantly. Harry offered her an apologetic nod before turning back to Teddy. “Can’t you hold it? We’ll disturb everyone if we get up right now.”
Teddy glowered indignantly at him. “Harry, I have to go now,” he said in that same, no-nonsense tone Draco used when he announced that he 'had a headache'. Harry was beginning to suspect that this was one of those famed Black traits. “If you don’t take me, I’ll turn my hair purple,” Teddy threatened. “Glow in the dark purple!”
“Okay, okay,” Harry muttered, getting up and taking his hand. “Real quick, alright?”
They shuffled out of their seats, eliciting reluctant grumbling and muttering from other movie goers. Harry offered mumbled apologies as he ushered his godson to the aisle. Suddenly, he was poked again. Harry whirled around to Sirius’ grinning face.
“Great flick, huh?” his godfather enquired, not bothering to keep his voice down. His loud tone resulted in another round of grumbling. Harry tried not to groan.
“Sirius, hush!” he hissed. “We’re in a movie theatre.”
“Ugh, fine,” Sirius replied blithely. “I was just going to say if you’re taking Teddy down for a piss, can you grab me some more nachos? Those sumbitches are tasty.”
“Fine fine!” Harry snapped. “Just keep it down.”
****
It took him ten minutes to handle Teddy and another ten to get the nachos, but Harry finally made it back. His eyes adjusted to the dimness of the theatre and he stumbled back to his seat. He was barely settled when an indignant whisper from his right caught his attention.
“Harry!” Draco snapped, poking his shoulder to get his attention.
Harry jumped and turned to his glowering boyfriend. “Tell your godfather to stop stealing my food,” Draco demanded, huddling over his popcorn and glaring at Sirius.
Sirius wasn’t going down without a fight. “Harry, tell Blondie to share!”
“Shh!”
“Oi! Keep it down in front!”
“Sorry!” Harry snapped in the general direction of the row behind him before turning to his misbehaving family. “Stop it, both of you. Sirius, I got your nachos. Here. Draco, learn to share. Now both of you shut it and let me watch this movie!”
He turned back resolutely to the screen and willed himself to concentrate. The father fish was making a break for it. Ha, those stupid seagulls didn’t stand a chance in...
Crunch.
“Hey! There’s no salsa with these nachos!”
“Ouch! That’s my arm-rest, Black. Use your own!”
“Oh, take it to the Wizengamot.”
“Shh!”
“Guys!” Harry snapped. “Seriously!”
“Heh. Don’t you mean ‘siriusly’?”
“Harry, I need to go again.”
“Not now, Teddy…”
Crunch. Crunch.
“Oi! Those are my nachos!”
“Take it to the Wizengamot, Black.”
“That’s it! If you don’t start behaving yourselves, Merlin help me I’m going to...Teddy, don’t you dare turn purple, you hear me?!”
“Shhhhh!!”
“Oh, shut up!” Harry yelled, finally losing it and rounding up on the stupid bint. “You fucking shush, lady! Why don’t you try handling them and see what happens?! Think you can do better, eh? Eh?!”
“Harry!” Draco gasped incredulously.
“Shut up and eat your gravel!”
Draco squawked in indignation and Sirius crowed happily. “Woo-hoo! Someone’s getting the couch tonight!”
Harry snarled and took a step towards him, fully intending to throttle his godfather. Unfortunately, he was impeded by a firm hand on his shoulder. Harry turned to look right into the grim face of an usher. “Sir, you’re going to have to come with me.”
****
It was a disgruntled and sullen bunch of Blacks who trudged out of the movie theatre, following a seething Harry.
“I can’t believe you got us kicked out of the movie!” Teddy complained.
“Nice going, Potter,” Draco sneered.
“Really, Harry,” Sirius tutted. “You should know how to behave in a public setting. Really bad show.”
They blinked in confusion as Harry snarled dangerously and stormed off, stomping all the way back to Diagon Alley. Sirius shook his head and tutted disapprovingly, before turning back to the remaining Blacks. “So, who's in for the amusement park next week?”
**Cross-posted to hd_fluff here**
Rating: PG 13
Word Count: 850
Warning(s): Non canon compliant, alive!Sirius
Summary: Harry takes his family out for a movie, with disastrous consequences.
Author's notes: Super quick job for dove_drabbles October prompt: Whisper in the dark.
Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter. This was written for fun, not profit.
In hindsight, Harry admitted that Black Family movie night was not one of his best ideas. It had seemed like fun at the time; going to the movies with Teddy, Sirius and Draco. Now however, he wasn't so sure...
Crunch.
Crunch. Crunch.
Crunch!
Well, at least Draco was enjoying his popcorn. Harry winced at the racket his boyfriend was making, fastidiously ignored the glowering woman seated right behind him and tried his best concentrate on the movie.
Things had taken a bad turn for the little clownfish. He had been captured by divers and if his father didn’t get to him in time, that awful little girl with the monster braces would take him away. Harry tried not to sigh at the unfairness of it all.
Teddy sure knew how to pick a tearjerker of a film, that’s for sure.
Speaking of Teddy…
“Harry! Psst, Harry!”
Harry started a little at his godson's urgent whisper. “What is it, Ted?” he asked, leaning over the fidgety little boy. Teddy shuffled uncomfortably in his seat. “I have to go,” he whispered back.
Harry groaned. “Now? I told you to go to the loo before the film started.”
“I didn’t have to go then.”
“Shh!” the woman behind them hissed indignantly. Harry offered her an apologetic nod before turning back to Teddy. “Can’t you hold it? We’ll disturb everyone if we get up right now.”
Teddy glowered indignantly at him. “Harry, I have to go now,” he said in that same, no-nonsense tone Draco used when he announced that he 'had a headache'. Harry was beginning to suspect that this was one of those famed Black traits. “If you don’t take me, I’ll turn my hair purple,” Teddy threatened. “Glow in the dark purple!”
“Okay, okay,” Harry muttered, getting up and taking his hand. “Real quick, alright?”
They shuffled out of their seats, eliciting reluctant grumbling and muttering from other movie goers. Harry offered mumbled apologies as he ushered his godson to the aisle. Suddenly, he was poked again. Harry whirled around to Sirius’ grinning face.
“Great flick, huh?” his godfather enquired, not bothering to keep his voice down. His loud tone resulted in another round of grumbling. Harry tried not to groan.
“Sirius, hush!” he hissed. “We’re in a movie theatre.”
“Ugh, fine,” Sirius replied blithely. “I was just going to say if you’re taking Teddy down for a piss, can you grab me some more nachos? Those sumbitches are tasty.”
“Fine fine!” Harry snapped. “Just keep it down.”
****
It took him ten minutes to handle Teddy and another ten to get the nachos, but Harry finally made it back. His eyes adjusted to the dimness of the theatre and he stumbled back to his seat. He was barely settled when an indignant whisper from his right caught his attention.
“Harry!” Draco snapped, poking his shoulder to get his attention.
Harry jumped and turned to his glowering boyfriend. “Tell your godfather to stop stealing my food,” Draco demanded, huddling over his popcorn and glaring at Sirius.
Sirius wasn’t going down without a fight. “Harry, tell Blondie to share!”
“Shh!”
“Oi! Keep it down in front!”
“Sorry!” Harry snapped in the general direction of the row behind him before turning to his misbehaving family. “Stop it, both of you. Sirius, I got your nachos. Here. Draco, learn to share. Now both of you shut it and let me watch this movie!”
He turned back resolutely to the screen and willed himself to concentrate. The father fish was making a break for it. Ha, those stupid seagulls didn’t stand a chance in...
Crunch.
“Hey! There’s no salsa with these nachos!”
“Ouch! That’s my arm-rest, Black. Use your own!”
“Oh, take it to the Wizengamot.”
“Shh!”
“Guys!” Harry snapped. “Seriously!”
“Heh. Don’t you mean ‘siriusly’?”
“Harry, I need to go again.”
“Not now, Teddy…”
Crunch. Crunch.
“Oi! Those are my nachos!”
“Take it to the Wizengamot, Black.”
“That’s it! If you don’t start behaving yourselves, Merlin help me I’m going to...Teddy, don’t you dare turn purple, you hear me?!”
“Shhhhh!!”
“Oh, shut up!” Harry yelled, finally losing it and rounding up on the stupid bint. “You fucking shush, lady! Why don’t you try handling them and see what happens?! Think you can do better, eh? Eh?!”
“Harry!” Draco gasped incredulously.
“Shut up and eat your gravel!”
Draco squawked in indignation and Sirius crowed happily. “Woo-hoo! Someone’s getting the couch tonight!”
Harry snarled and took a step towards him, fully intending to throttle his godfather. Unfortunately, he was impeded by a firm hand on his shoulder. Harry turned to look right into the grim face of an usher. “Sir, you’re going to have to come with me.”
****
It was a disgruntled and sullen bunch of Blacks who trudged out of the movie theatre, following a seething Harry.
“I can’t believe you got us kicked out of the movie!” Teddy complained.
“Nice going, Potter,” Draco sneered.
“Really, Harry,” Sirius tutted. “You should know how to behave in a public setting. Really bad show.”
They blinked in confusion as Harry snarled dangerously and stormed off, stomping all the way back to Diagon Alley. Sirius shook his head and tutted disapprovingly, before turning back to the remaining Blacks. “So, who's in for the amusement park next week?”
**Cross-posted to hd_fluff here**