(no subject)
Sigh, well today I figure out what to do with the car. I'll either get some used car place to take it off my hands or donate it to the college.
I've unsubscribed from all but 2 of my asatru and spirituality lists. The main purpose they served was to make me happy that I got some email on slow days. I am sick of skimming through several hundred posts to find no new ideas, no interesting thoughts, just a gaggle of people jerking off into their spirituality. I get ticked when I see people asking for rituals to do. I get ticked when I see people clinging like starving rats to an idea or symbol that they really like but have no connection with (yes this statement makes me a hypocrite). I saw a post with a gal who was all chatty with her diety about 'harvest this' and 'harvest that,' and quite frankly her post indicated to me that all she's ever grown was a bank account and a credit rating.
You want to tell me that Sif has been chatting harvest with you, then tell me about your frigging garden! No garden, fine, what's in the herb box outside the window? Ah... nothing growing huh?Then don't talk about harvest and sickle shaped frigging amulets unless you grow things and know what the hel you're talking about!
Let's see what else chewed me in reading that mass of knotted BS. Ah yes, I return to an old favorite. The Lore Whores... 'It says in this book...', 'it's says in the ....' , 'this ancient story says...', 'what does the lore say about....?' I'm not even going to elaborate on my disdain for this line of thought. If I did I would fill a years worth of journaling with explicatives.
One list I was on had people who enjoyed writing diatribes on... whatever. The nature of being. The three laws of consciousness. The quintessential meaning of Gnosis. I have become old in the respect that you have about 3 skimmed sentences at the beginning of your writing to grab my interest. I am not google and do not have the time to spend sequencing out Pterabytes of crap.
I love new ideas. I love new ways of thinking. But in all truth and fairness I really want new ways of thinking like I do. I want something that will help expand my own parsing of reality into a more mentally accomodacious paradigm where things make more sense. That was what I had hoped to find in the morass of the internet and though I think it might still be out there I do not have the diligence to search for it in that word filled desert. Ugh. I am grateful to have my own ideas and even more grateful that I am comfortable with them. I look forward to a reduced influx of crap in my mail.
What else...? Ah yes. I got my passport and I am mostly set to get my arse over the pond and into the Britton's School. Summer is being mentally racorous and I do little but a bit of work, some munching and a lot of brooding. Numerous affairs rob me of sleep and draw rancor on my otherwise placid existence.
I am vexed with the prospect of an undemanding universe in which I, from various points of perception, amount to little more than the turning of a grain of sand on a beach as well as dictate the flow of the disposition of the entire waterfront on a long enough timeline. In a way it will be exquisite to get to work in a fairly demanding job. It will put thoughts of certain people and certain things firmly in a less agitated part of my mind.
Ok. A mental roadblock has been reached and I have already made a semi-successful thought dump.
It occurs to me that journaling is at times strained. On some level I do so idylly enjoy the idea that these thoughts will be read and yet I am partially frustrated at times by the fact that I cannot truely post my mind. Even when I had a paper journal I considered some thoughts too 'whiney' to be put down. There is also the matter that there are some people who may read a truly heart bare entry whom I would not wish to as it may involve them but that would defeat the purpose of the secret desire that the words be read. I know there are filters but there is the dichotomy of wanting to say things, wanting people to hear, and not knowing what the words will evoke. One of the grandest qualities of words is that they cannot ever be unread. :) Thoughts can never be unthought. Suspicions can never be unsuspiced. Wants can never be unwanted. ... Ah, I now have my glorious revelation for the day and my new idea to mull over. The irrevocability of thought.
It almost falls in line with the second law of thermodynamics except that the thought is created, once, and then it can never be recreated or destroyed but can only change forms. Mmmmmm science and cognition, glorious. Well I think I will go on to think thoughts I can never unthink about this little tryst for a while until the concept has seeped like WD40 into the dry cracks in my brain. Small wonders suffice at times once you really look at them.
I've unsubscribed from all but 2 of my asatru and spirituality lists. The main purpose they served was to make me happy that I got some email on slow days. I am sick of skimming through several hundred posts to find no new ideas, no interesting thoughts, just a gaggle of people jerking off into their spirituality. I get ticked when I see people asking for rituals to do. I get ticked when I see people clinging like starving rats to an idea or symbol that they really like but have no connection with (yes this statement makes me a hypocrite). I saw a post with a gal who was all chatty with her diety about 'harvest this' and 'harvest that,' and quite frankly her post indicated to me that all she's ever grown was a bank account and a credit rating.
You want to tell me that Sif has been chatting harvest with you, then tell me about your frigging garden! No garden, fine, what's in the herb box outside the window? Ah... nothing growing huh?Then don't talk about harvest and sickle shaped frigging amulets unless you grow things and know what the hel you're talking about!
Let's see what else chewed me in reading that mass of knotted BS. Ah yes, I return to an old favorite. The Lore Whores... 'It says in this book...', 'it's says in the ....' , 'this ancient story says...', 'what does the lore say about....?' I'm not even going to elaborate on my disdain for this line of thought. If I did I would fill a years worth of journaling with explicatives.
One list I was on had people who enjoyed writing diatribes on... whatever. The nature of being. The three laws of consciousness. The quintessential meaning of Gnosis. I have become old in the respect that you have about 3 skimmed sentences at the beginning of your writing to grab my interest. I am not google and do not have the time to spend sequencing out Pterabytes of crap.
I love new ideas. I love new ways of thinking. But in all truth and fairness I really want new ways of thinking like I do. I want something that will help expand my own parsing of reality into a more mentally accomodacious paradigm where things make more sense. That was what I had hoped to find in the morass of the internet and though I think it might still be out there I do not have the diligence to search for it in that word filled desert. Ugh. I am grateful to have my own ideas and even more grateful that I am comfortable with them. I look forward to a reduced influx of crap in my mail.
What else...? Ah yes. I got my passport and I am mostly set to get my arse over the pond and into the Britton's School. Summer is being mentally racorous and I do little but a bit of work, some munching and a lot of brooding. Numerous affairs rob me of sleep and draw rancor on my otherwise placid existence.
I am vexed with the prospect of an undemanding universe in which I, from various points of perception, amount to little more than the turning of a grain of sand on a beach as well as dictate the flow of the disposition of the entire waterfront on a long enough timeline. In a way it will be exquisite to get to work in a fairly demanding job. It will put thoughts of certain people and certain things firmly in a less agitated part of my mind.
Ok. A mental roadblock has been reached and I have already made a semi-successful thought dump.
It occurs to me that journaling is at times strained. On some level I do so idylly enjoy the idea that these thoughts will be read and yet I am partially frustrated at times by the fact that I cannot truely post my mind. Even when I had a paper journal I considered some thoughts too 'whiney' to be put down. There is also the matter that there are some people who may read a truly heart bare entry whom I would not wish to as it may involve them but that would defeat the purpose of the secret desire that the words be read. I know there are filters but there is the dichotomy of wanting to say things, wanting people to hear, and not knowing what the words will evoke. One of the grandest qualities of words is that they cannot ever be unread. :) Thoughts can never be unthought. Suspicions can never be unsuspiced. Wants can never be unwanted. ... Ah, I now have my glorious revelation for the day and my new idea to mull over. The irrevocability of thought.
It almost falls in line with the second law of thermodynamics except that the thought is created, once, and then it can never be recreated or destroyed but can only change forms. Mmmmmm science and cognition, glorious. Well I think I will go on to think thoughts I can never unthink about this little tryst for a while until the concept has seeped like WD40 into the dry cracks in my brain. Small wonders suffice at times once you really look at them.