Dec 30, 2007 01:07
So....
Things are... what's the word I'm searching for.. obstructed...
Allow a simile..
It's like I'm at the airport looking at all these really cool and really different places.. and because of the roots and obligations I've placed upon myself I can't go, "Hey, I'm gonna fly there and do that.."
..it's more of a movement that will be, or could be, but won't be now....
One last semester...
I really hope to land a solid place that I can live in..
Huh, what else..
All the artwork is obstructed... frustrating... I can never work around my family because they don't get it... unintentionally they're more distracting and artsitically draining than they even realize... but what can I do.. we're moving and god forbid I waste my time working.. And I really hope that I can just get everything done..
It's discouraging when you realize you've given yourself too much to work on.. and for some reason my head gets very scattered..
I hope I can find the lynchpin to bring this whole insane plan of mine to fruition.
And, for the first time in a long time.... I feel really out there again.. I'm back drifting in the ether.. I'm the Brett that everyone in the "real world" knows.. and no matter what I do, I can't shake the horrible feeling of what that means....
But, to end on a nice note, the holiday was enjoyable. My relationship with the fam is very...interesting. In a good way, I guess? It's fun to figure out how to relate to my brothers and parents, since all four of them are relatively conservative and therefore, aren't immediately open-minded.. but they're funny.
Ah well.... I'm gonna go do something less...deep..
beer and halo.. yeah, that's about ankle high.. :p