ADAM GOES TO THE MOVIES!
i've seen a bunch of movies in the last couple of weeks.
Sideways: this movie was really good. paul giamatti should have gotten the oscar nod though, not the goober from Wings. this movie also made me want to get more into wine, before i remembered that 9 times out of ten wine tastes like shit and i could just go drink some tequila or jack daniels and be way more satisfied. if anyone was a fan of Arli$$, seeing the stuffy asian secretary as a wild slut is fun too.
Win a Date With Tad Hamilton: this movie was ridiculous. tad hamilton shows a grotesque amount of patience in his romantic dealings with some bumblefuck chick from the sticks towards the end of this movie. i also have no sympathy for topher grace in this one, as he came off like a real tool and should have boned the hot bar maid who was into him. still for a rainy HBO afternoon, its worth a look.
Hitch: this is a good date movie. the chick that looks like gina gershon but hispanic has a big ass. kevin james is fat and hilarious. and will smith, as usual, satisfies. if i could ask for anything, it would be more will smith ass kicking/blowing shit up. if they could somehow work Hitch 2 into a buddy cop movie with big willie and the king of queens, you've got one ticket sold.
Closer: sucked. jude law is a pussy. natalie portman is cute but she always acts like she's half a retard in movies lately and retards aren't hot. julia roberts is the same boring character she plays in every other movie i've ever seen her in, except she talks about eating cum and still finds a way to make it not entertaining. clive owen was the highlight of this one. he was the only character i, and probably most men i know, would sympathize with. this movie also seemed kind of vulgar for the sake of being vulgar, but that only works if it isn't boring. this movie was pretty boring. no one really did anything. they didn't even really fuck, they just talked about it alot.
Beauty Shop: this movie was entertaining and fun for a date, but most glaring omission of this movie in my opinion were realistic black males. in the barbershop movies, there were a vast array of black guys of all shapes, sizes and disposition. in this one, all the men were supermodel looking, supersensitive pseudo-gay musclemen. i can see how it would appeal to the demographic that they are going for, but i felt far less satisfied than the barbershop movies. also, the secondary characters (or even the main character) never came full-circle and rectified their character flaws which is essential in a movie like this. i mean, alicia silverstone is white and they all hate her. then, she starts dressing tacky and screwing a black guy and they tolerate her. there is no real change in the relationship. in barbershop, the condescending black guy eventually bonded with the token honkey and they reached some kind of real connection. this movie was lacking that kind of closure. however, it was entertaining throughout even thoug the story by the end nearly mimmicked that of the original barbershop.
Sin City: this movie was fucking awesome. unlike Closer, Clive Owen was the lowpoint of this one. if you're an A-List actor, atleast learn to talk like a fucking american and hide your accent better. however, insane elijah wood eating whores, sacrilege,bruce willis penis ripping and beating with said penis,the gilmour girl as a whore, and mickey rourke with a crazy fucked up face beating and killing the fuck out of everyone makes this my PICK OF THE WEEK!
getting to current events, for a completely egomaniacal and insane look at the Terry Schiavo situation, everyone read what THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR has to say about it.
http://www.ultimatewarrior.com/03.22.05.htm
Sideways: this movie was really good. paul giamatti should have gotten the oscar nod though, not the goober from Wings. this movie also made me want to get more into wine, before i remembered that 9 times out of ten wine tastes like shit and i could just go drink some tequila or jack daniels and be way more satisfied. if anyone was a fan of Arli$$, seeing the stuffy asian secretary as a wild slut is fun too.
Win a Date With Tad Hamilton: this movie was ridiculous. tad hamilton shows a grotesque amount of patience in his romantic dealings with some bumblefuck chick from the sticks towards the end of this movie. i also have no sympathy for topher grace in this one, as he came off like a real tool and should have boned the hot bar maid who was into him. still for a rainy HBO afternoon, its worth a look.
Hitch: this is a good date movie. the chick that looks like gina gershon but hispanic has a big ass. kevin james is fat and hilarious. and will smith, as usual, satisfies. if i could ask for anything, it would be more will smith ass kicking/blowing shit up. if they could somehow work Hitch 2 into a buddy cop movie with big willie and the king of queens, you've got one ticket sold.
Closer: sucked. jude law is a pussy. natalie portman is cute but she always acts like she's half a retard in movies lately and retards aren't hot. julia roberts is the same boring character she plays in every other movie i've ever seen her in, except she talks about eating cum and still finds a way to make it not entertaining. clive owen was the highlight of this one. he was the only character i, and probably most men i know, would sympathize with. this movie also seemed kind of vulgar for the sake of being vulgar, but that only works if it isn't boring. this movie was pretty boring. no one really did anything. they didn't even really fuck, they just talked about it alot.
Beauty Shop: this movie was entertaining and fun for a date, but most glaring omission of this movie in my opinion were realistic black males. in the barbershop movies, there were a vast array of black guys of all shapes, sizes and disposition. in this one, all the men were supermodel looking, supersensitive pseudo-gay musclemen. i can see how it would appeal to the demographic that they are going for, but i felt far less satisfied than the barbershop movies. also, the secondary characters (or even the main character) never came full-circle and rectified their character flaws which is essential in a movie like this. i mean, alicia silverstone is white and they all hate her. then, she starts dressing tacky and screwing a black guy and they tolerate her. there is no real change in the relationship. in barbershop, the condescending black guy eventually bonded with the token honkey and they reached some kind of real connection. this movie was lacking that kind of closure. however, it was entertaining throughout even thoug the story by the end nearly mimmicked that of the original barbershop.
Sin City: this movie was fucking awesome. unlike Closer, Clive Owen was the lowpoint of this one. if you're an A-List actor, atleast learn to talk like a fucking american and hide your accent better. however, insane elijah wood eating whores, sacrilege,bruce willis penis ripping and beating with said penis,the gilmour girl as a whore, and mickey rourke with a crazy fucked up face beating and killing the fuck out of everyone makes this my PICK OF THE WEEK!
getting to current events, for a completely egomaniacal and insane look at the Terry Schiavo situation, everyone read what THE ULTIMATE WARRIOR has to say about it.
http://www.ultimatewarrior.com/03.22.05.htm