A VERY Ranty Post. Beware.
A Bit of An Introduction
I have felt exceedingly overwhelmed today.
I am trying to be more positive about life.
I usually try to make light of the bad things going on in my life by making jokes out of them.
I would hate to think that I am a whiner or a complainer. I mean, we all are at some point, but I don't want to think that that's what I am all the time. As of late, it feels like that. I really wish I could just fast forward to the end of this semester. I have so many things due by the end of the semester that thinking about it is making me want to throw up.
I honestly don't think it would be so bad if I didn't have this surgery coming up. I am scared to death that they are going to find something horribly wrong with me...
BALEETED!
On an odd note, one of my friends who was on my Top 16 (or whatever the heck I have) deleted me. It happened a couple weeks ago, when all of the sudden my Top Friends became all screwy. I knew someone was missing, but I couldn't figure out who it was. However, when I tried to post a comment on their blog and it said I wasn't their friend, then I realized it. I don't know what to think of this. I know it's only Myspace and everything, but it's really going to bug me as to WHY they deleted me. :-\ I tried to add them back as a friend, thinking perhaps they deleted me by accident? However, my sad little pending friend request just sits there, never to be approved. I suppose I should cancel the request. Ah well.
Doomy Doom
One more week until surgery. I feel like my ovaries are ticking time bombs, and at minute they might explode. It's a very unsettling feeling. I just want all this bullshit over with, and for them to tell me what the hell is wrong with me and how they magically fixed it and I will never have to be in pain again. That would be lovely.
Food
My mom made some comments about how I'm getting fat. That's always fun. "Amanda you're face is getting really full, you think you should have that slice of pie? I'm going to have healthy yogurt for dessert." Yippee. Ugh. Can I just say that I hate the smell of yogurt? It makes me want to throw up.
Mañana
Tomorrow should be a relatively easy day. History bullshit, Jasper bullshit, and then Musical Theatre bullshit. So, to sum up: Bullshit.
I Feel Pretty, And Witty, And...
I need to have a pretty day tomorrow. I'm going to do my hair and put on makeup and it's going to be wonderful. And then even better, I'm going to get to hang out with Nich and we are going to go have delicious dinner somewhere.
Unnecessary Crying
Sigh.
I got home from school today early around 1:00pm, and fell asleep until 5:00pm. I woke up crying. I haven't done that in a while. I was having a dream about my dog Brandy dying, and having to say goodbye to her, you know, except for the fact that Brandy's already been dead for like 3 years.
I also cried today when my mom brought home fish to make for dinner, because I thought we were having spaghetti. Who cries over FISH?? Apparently I do.
Conclusion
Well, tis time for a good-night call to the boyfriend, and off to sleepy-land: Where I hopefully will not dream about already deceased pets, cry about fish, or have ovaries exploding.
Adieu.
I have felt exceedingly overwhelmed today.
I am trying to be more positive about life.
I usually try to make light of the bad things going on in my life by making jokes out of them.
I would hate to think that I am a whiner or a complainer. I mean, we all are at some point, but I don't want to think that that's what I am all the time. As of late, it feels like that. I really wish I could just fast forward to the end of this semester. I have so many things due by the end of the semester that thinking about it is making me want to throw up.
I honestly don't think it would be so bad if I didn't have this surgery coming up. I am scared to death that they are going to find something horribly wrong with me...
BALEETED!
On an odd note, one of my friends who was on my Top 16 (or whatever the heck I have) deleted me. It happened a couple weeks ago, when all of the sudden my Top Friends became all screwy. I knew someone was missing, but I couldn't figure out who it was. However, when I tried to post a comment on their blog and it said I wasn't their friend, then I realized it. I don't know what to think of this. I know it's only Myspace and everything, but it's really going to bug me as to WHY they deleted me. :-\ I tried to add them back as a friend, thinking perhaps they deleted me by accident? However, my sad little pending friend request just sits there, never to be approved. I suppose I should cancel the request. Ah well.
Doomy Doom
One more week until surgery. I feel like my ovaries are ticking time bombs, and at minute they might explode. It's a very unsettling feeling. I just want all this bullshit over with, and for them to tell me what the hell is wrong with me and how they magically fixed it and I will never have to be in pain again. That would be lovely.
Food
My mom made some comments about how I'm getting fat. That's always fun. "Amanda you're face is getting really full, you think you should have that slice of pie? I'm going to have healthy yogurt for dessert." Yippee. Ugh. Can I just say that I hate the smell of yogurt? It makes me want to throw up.
Mañana
Tomorrow should be a relatively easy day. History bullshit, Jasper bullshit, and then Musical Theatre bullshit. So, to sum up: Bullshit.
I Feel Pretty, And Witty, And...
I need to have a pretty day tomorrow. I'm going to do my hair and put on makeup and it's going to be wonderful. And then even better, I'm going to get to hang out with Nich and we are going to go have delicious dinner somewhere.
Unnecessary Crying
Sigh.
I got home from school today early around 1:00pm, and fell asleep until 5:00pm. I woke up crying. I haven't done that in a while. I was having a dream about my dog Brandy dying, and having to say goodbye to her, you know, except for the fact that Brandy's already been dead for like 3 years.
I also cried today when my mom brought home fish to make for dinner, because I thought we were having spaghetti. Who cries over FISH?? Apparently I do.
Conclusion
Well, tis time for a good-night call to the boyfriend, and off to sleepy-land: Where I hopefully will not dream about already deceased pets, cry about fish, or have ovaries exploding.
Adieu.