November Rain, Part 1 of 2
a/n: The inspiration for the title of this fic is the song "November Rain," by Guns-n-Roses. It takes place Thanksgiving, 2010. Luke and Reid never got back together after May 31, when Reid kicked Luke out of his apartment. Luke tried to mend things with Noah, but it didn't work, and Noah moved to LA a month later. Luke and Reid still work together, but their relationship is strictly professional. Reid's walls are firmly in place. They are amicable to each other, but Reid keeps Luke at a distance. This is so much different than my plans for it at the beginning. It was supposed to be a smut fic, set at Thanksgiving, where Luke and Reid fall into bed for some revenge/make up sex. However, I very quickly I realized my muses had a different idea. :)
Thanks for reading and commenting and making my day. :)
Part 2 will be posted tomorrow. I just need to proofread it.
Here's the GnR video. I love the theatricality of this video. Slash is so dang cool. Why does their drummer look like Anthony Geary?
Click to viewAnd when your fears subside,
And shadows still remain,
I know that you can love me
When there's no one left to blame.
So never mind the darkness;
We still can find a way,
'Cause nothin' lasts forever,
Even cold November rain.
Don't ya think that you need somebody?
Don't ya think that you need someone?
Everybody needs somebody;
You're not the only one.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONLY ONE.
Luke ducked into Kirby's Diner, the only restaurant open in the vacinity of Oakdale, hating the sound of the bell over the door. He shook the rain droplets from his hair and wiped them from his eyes. "Hey, honey, come on in and get warm! It's a mess out there," a large red-headed woman greeted him from the counter. "The place is pretty much yours. Sit wherever you like, and I'll be right with you, baby." Luke looked around the restaurant. A teen couple sat in the corner, completely "into" each other, and one other lone diner sat with his back to him, a knitted cap on his head. Luke went to sit down by the window, with his back to the couple in the opposite corner, but as he did, he recognized the watch on the lone diner's arm and walked over to him. "Reid?"
Reid looked up from the five plates in front of him. "Mr. Snyder," he drawled, with his mouth full of food.
"Reid, cut it out. Don't call me that." Reid mock saluted Luke without looking at him and kept eating. Luke looked around at the empty tables in the restaurant. "May I sit with you?" Reid pointed to the opposite side of the table with his fork. "I'll take that as a yes," Luke said, removing his coat and spreading it along the back of his chair. He pulled the cap off Reid's head and placed it on the table. "I didn't recognize you with that thing on." He sat down and watched Reid eat, neither of them speaking.
"My name's Vivian...you can call me Viv. Do you need a menu, darling?" the red-headed waitress asked when she arrived at their table. She looked over at Reid briefly and warned, "Slow down their, cowboy. It's not going anywhere," before turning her attention back to Luke.
"No, mam. I'd just like a cup of coffee, black, please, and a slice of pumpkin pie, if you have it."
"Well, of course we do, sweetheart, it's Thanksgiving. I'll get that right out to you."
"Thanks." Luke's eyes returned to Reid. "Why aren't you over at the Hughes' with Katie?"
Reid shrugged. "She invited me, but I don't know..........I would have felt out of place, and ......" he shook his head and continued eating.
"The Hughes throw a fantastic Thanksgiving dinner. You should have gone."
"What about you?" Reid asked, changing the subject but still not looking at Luke. "Why aren't you with your hundreds of relations here in Mulberry?"
Luke smirked. "I was out at the farm with everyone, but....." He shook his head.
"But what?"
Luke shook his head again. "Forget it."
Reid took a sip of his soda. "But the farm dogs made off with the turkey?"
Luke rolled his eyes. "No."
"But a tornado came and ironically took everyone to Oz but you?"
Luke smiled. "No."
"But your mother ran off with your father again...good dad? Bad dad? Anyone's guess..."
"Reid..."
""Let me guess, a squinty-eyed, formerly-blind-barrista-slash-Ron-Howard-wannabe showed up, and it made you feel forlorn?" He made an overly dramatic sad face.
"Ya know what Reid, fuck you."
"Hmm," Reid replied. "Hit a nerve, huh? Close guess or on the money?"
Just then the waitress arrived with Luke's pie. "Viv, I'll take that to go," Luke said, standing up.
"Oh, c'mon," Reid said, leaning over and tugging on on the sleeve of Luke's black Henly. "Don't be an idiot. Sit."
Luke sighed and sat back down. He took a bite of pie and a sip of coffee. "I wasn't forlorn about anything." Luke explained defensively. "He brought someone. A guy........a blond, tanned, freaking Abercrombie-model-looking beach god." Luke tongued the inside of his cheek and shook his head. "Why did he have to be so damn good looking? God. I mean, I'm happy for him, ya know........I guess.........yeah, of course I want him to be happy, but...." Luke picked at his pie with his fork.
"But you don't really want to hang around and watch it, do you?" Reid asked, licking cherry cheesecake off the side of his fork. "Yeah. I get that." He glared at Luke.
"Yeah," Luke replied, trying to ignore the irritation in Reid's voice. He wondered if he and Reid could ever be friends. They saw each other two or three times a week at the hospital, but they didn't talk unless it was necessary, and Luke knew that Reid avoided him whenever possible. If he tried to start up a friendly conversation with the doctor, Reid would shut it down immediately. Luke thought back to their very brief start, hate turning into affection and respect for one another and how they'd gotten closer, so much closer, sharing intimate details about their lives, before Luke had stupidly returned to a relationship with Noah once his sight was restored. It didn't last long because Noah hadn't changed. Not one bit. However, by the time Luke had ended things with Noah for good, Reid wasn't interested in setting himself up for a fall again. He didn't say it in those words, but Luke knew why he wasn't willing to give Luke a second chance. He had hurt Reid. The stubborn doctor would never admit that of course, but Luke knew it, and he hated himself for it. Reid was a master architect when it came to constructing emotional fortresses. Luke knew why. He felt a pang in his chest just thinking about the whys. And, well...Reid wasn't the kind of person that was going to give you the chance to hurt him a second time.
Luke noticed Reid was wearing scrubs and had his stethoscope around his neck underneath his jacket and decided to change the subject. "You worked today?"
"I always work holidays," Reid answered, motioning for Viv to return to the table while arching his back to pull his wallet out of his back pocket. "Nobody else wants to, and since I don't celebrate things, I might as well be there doing what I love to do."
"What do you do there on a holiday?"
"Monitor patients in house. Cover the ER. Sickness never takes a day off. A resident came in and took over for me this evening."
Vivian approached their table. "What else can I get for you, Doc?"
"A piece of blueberry pie with a scoop of vanilla ice cream....make that two scoops, and put his stuff on my check," Reid said, motioning toward Luke and handing Vivian cash. "Keep the change."
"Sure thing, honeybear," she said, walking away, but then she suddenly turned back around. "I think you've made a mistake," she remarked, returning to the table and holding up two $100 bills.
"I don't make mistakes. Right, Luke?" It was the first time since Luke had sat down that Reid's eyes met his and held them.
Luke rolled his eyes. "Dr. Oliver is perfect and makes no mistakes, Viv. Everyone knows this," he said sarcastically.
"See?" Reid said, looking smug. "Mr. Snyder says I'm perfect."
"This is too much," Vivian said, handing the bills back to Reid. Your check is only going to be forty five dollars or so, even with the desserts and coffee. Thank you, but I can't accept this."
"You served me an excellent Thanksgiving meal, Reid said, patting his stomach. Please, accept it as a sign of my gratitude."
Viv chuckled. "It was a burger, chili, and three greasy sides."
"Plus a very thick and creamy choclolate shake, a soda that you kept refilled.......and don't forget the pie and cheesecake. I enjoyed every bite. Please, keep the change. Happy Thanksgiving."
Viv clutched the money to her ample chest, and Luke could see tears in her eyes. "Thank you, Doctor. You have no idea how much I need a little extra money right now. Thank you!"
"You're welcome," Reid said, grimacing. "Let's not get all weepy about it."
Viv smiled through her tears. "I am going to wrap up a whole pie to go for you. Which flavor would you like? Blueberry? Apple?"
Reid picked up his fork and stole a bite of Luke's pie as Luke smirked at him. After swallowing it, he replied, "Pumpkin."
As Vivian walked excitedly away, Luke said, "That was really nice of you."
Reid shrugged. "It sucks having to work on a holiday."
"You just got done telling me that you always work on holidays."
"That's because I want to. Ms. Sweetie Pie/Baby Cakes/Darling Honey Bear over there probably has a family that she'd much rather be with than here serving me a cheeseburger." Reid looked over at the counter, watching the waitress pack up a pie to go, and Luke thought he looked a little bit sad.
"What did you mean when you said you didn't celebrate things. You celebrate some things, don't you? What about New Year's Eve?"
"A lot of casualties come in on New Year's Eve, especially after midnight..."
Just then, Luke's phone rang. He looked down at the screen. "Shit. It's my mother."
"Send her my regards," Reid said sarcastically.
Luke shook his head and answered the phone. "Hey, Mom...........no........no, I'm fine...........I know........Yes, mom, I know I should have told someone I was leaving...........................I know; I'll call her tomorrow and apologize.........................I'm at Kirby's.........no.............................................no!..........seriously, mom...........please, don't send him over here.....................I ran into someone, ok? I'm having dessert..................just someone, mom..............yes, a guy............." Luke looked at Reid and rolled his eyes. Reid actually looked amused. "Listen, mom........I've got to go............no, it's not like that.....................Mom!..........I'm hanging up now..........yes...........ok............bye.........yeah, you too. Bye." Luke rubbed his forehead. "Sorry about that..."
"You in trouble, Richie Rich?"
Luke chuckled. "You haven't called me that in forever."
Reid shrugged. "It stopped seeming appropriate when you started funding the neuro wing."
"It was never appropriate. No, um.....I didn't tell anyone I was leaving, so they were all ready to send the bloodhounds out looking for me."
Viv arrived at their table, refilled Luke's coffee, placed a slice of blueberry pie in front of Reid with a "Honey, I don't know where you put it," and handed him a bag. "One pumpkin pie. Thank you so much, love; you made my week."
Reid grinned just slightly as Vivian cleared some of the plates off the table. "You're welcome."
"Enjoy the rest of your evening, gentlemen. Happy Thanksgiving."
"Happy Thanksgiving," Luke replied.
Reid slid the blueberry pie to the middle of the table and nodded towards it.
Luke grinned and picked up a fork; the simple gesture of sharing his pie was the most warmth he'd gotten from Reid in a long, long time.
"So, why did you leave without telling anyone?"
"I had to get out of the house. I went out to the barn to just get away from them. My mom was fawning all over Noah and his boyfriend...I can't remember his name."
"Abercrombie."
Luke laughed. "Yeah, Abercrombie, and they were going on and on about Noah's cinematic vision and blah, blah, blah...I guess Noah found someone who's excited about film as he is"
"Jealous..."
"No, I'm not. I swear. I just didn't feel like listening to it. I had to listen to it for four years. And for four years I feigned interest. I can't tell you the number of mind numbingly boring movies I sat through with him. Sometimes I'd fall asleep, and he'd get pissed. But he'd take me to these art house films that were so slow that I literally could not stay awake." Luke sighed. "Do you know that the whole time we were together, we never once went to see a stupid, mindless comedy? Ya know...the kind that is ridiculous but makes you laugh so hard that your side hurts? I wanted to see The Hangover. He refused, but then he didn't want me to see it either, telling me that it was going to lower my IQ and that if I was going to be the partner of a famous director, I needed to be better than that. So, I didn't go when Casey asked me. Never rented it. Still haven't seen it." Luke shook his head, trying to shake off the bad feelings that always seemed to come up when he thought too long about his and Noah's failed relationship.
"I saw it. I laughed my ass off. My IQ is still as high as ever," Reid said, pointing to his head with his fork.
Luke smiled. "Yeah." His eyes lingered on Reid's. "Anyway," Luke said, shaking his head, "I started to go back into the house after awhile, but I don't know, the thought of going in there and smiling and pretending that I didn't want to punch them both in the throat was just too much. I wanted to leave instead. So I did."
"Why did you come here?"
"Because I left before dessert," Luke said chuckling. "And I love pie."
"Me too."
They ate in silence for a few minutes, until the pie and ice cream were gone. "Reid?" Luke said, placing his fork on the plate.
"Yeah."
"On Christmas, are you working?"
"That's the plan, Stan."
if you don't have somewhere to eat, call me." Reid opened his mouth to protest, but Luke kept on talking. "Even if you work, and dinner's over... there's always leftovers. My grandmother makes way too much food. And she's such a good cook. She cooks Italian for Christmas...lasagna, baked ziti, spaghetti and meatballs. Different breads. And pie. Lots of pies. You don't have to be alone on Christmas."
"I'm fine eating by myself. It's just another day."
Luke nodded, knowing that Reid didn't need him to push the matter, understanding that underplaying his solitude was something Reid needed to do. "Just, if you find yourself not wanting to be alone..."
"Will Abercrombie be there?"
Luke laughed. "No. He won't. Noah said something about them going to Washington for Christmas."
"Pity," Reid said, jokingly. "How are, um," Reid shifted in his seat. "How are Noah's eyes? I've been wondering about them, and he took me out of the loop when he realized that we..."
"They're good! Oh, Reid, they're really, really good..." Luke reached over and put his hand over Reid's on the table. "It's a miracle, what you did." Reid pulled his hand away and put it in his lap. Luke sat back. "I know he was a dick to you because of....us, but I'm grateful, Reid. I'm grateful to you on his behalf."
"It wasn't a miracle. I just did what you dragged me here to do. My job. That's it. It's always part skill, part luck. There's nothing miraculous about it."
Luke shook his head. "No, it was you. And I'm so grateful...I don't know if I ever could have been free of him if he stayed blind. I just don't think I ever could have stopped feeling guilty about it."
"Glad to have been of service to you, Mr. Snyder," Reid said blandly, pinching the bridge of his nose.
Luke took a deep breath, not knowing how to bridge the gulf that was between him and Reid and deciding to let Reid off the hook. He looked at his watch. "I'm gonna go. Thanks for dessert." He stood up, leaned across the table and kissed Reid on the forehead. "I miss you, Reid. Happy Thanksgiving." Reid nodded and held Luke's eyes for a few seconds. Luke wasn't sure what was going on behind them. The whole windows- to-the-soul thing didn't work with Reid. He had a way of drawing the blinds on those windows, and it was almost impossible to see inside when he was like that. There definitely was no smile in them, no joy. He looked tired. "Bye, doc."
************************************************************
Reid watched Luke walk out the door, that stupid bell ringing, seeming to mock him somehow. Reid stared at the door long after Luke was gone.
"Aren't you going to go after him?" Viv asked as she picked up the pie plates and Luke's coffee cup. Reid looked at her, his brow furrowed. "You're in love with him, aren't you?"
Reid grimaced. "No," he answered, his voice cracking.
"Hmmm...you don't sound so sure of that, but okay," she answered. She walked away and came back with a pitcher to fill Reid's water glass. "I'm just saying, life's short, honey."
Reid huffed out a breath. Yeah, he knew all about that. "It's pretty bold of you to assume that two men you don't know are gay. It's not like we were making out or anything."
"It had to do with the way you looked at each other right before he left. There's regret there, but maybe a little bit of hope?"
Reid scowled. "You don't know what you're talking about."
"He kissed your forehead."
"Yeah. So?"
"That's a sign of genuine affection." Reid pshawed. "If he had been your brother or other family member, he would have kissed your cheek. A friend would have shaken your hand or squeezed your arm. A lover would have kissed your lips. He chose to kiss your forehead. It's a protective gesture. It's intimate. He cares about you."
"No he doesn't," Reid argued softly, but then his eyes went back to the door.
Vivian smiled. "Sometimes we have to take a leap of faith. Nobody should be alone on Thanksgiving."
Reid looked at the waitress. Every year there was someone who was worried about Reid being alone during the holidays. Sometimes it was someone he knew, and other times it was a total stranger...a meddling stranger who had no business trying to analyze him or his life. What did it matter? Their concern did nothing but make him feel like a pariah. It was just another day, like any other. He worked. He got off work. He ate dinner. No big deal. It was the same as every other Thursday in every other week of the year, but because someone made up some stupid story about Pilgrims eating with Indians, oh sorry Native Americans, suddenly the solitude that had served him well for his entire adult life, and even part of his childhood, is not good enough anymore. He's supposed to be with someone? Fuck that. "Who's at home waiting for you?" Reid asked, the exasperation clear in his voice.
Viv cocked her head. "My husband and teen daughters. We will celebrate the holiday tomorrow when I am off of work. Why?"
Reid just shook his head. "What if I want to be alone? Nobody ever thinks of that." His voice sounded more bitter than intended and he closed his eyes for a few seconds.
"That's your choice. But he's still out there, ya know. In the parking lot. It's not very heavy, just a drizzle now, but he's standing in that cold rain."
Reid refused to look out the window. He sat for a few minutes, drinking water, chewing on the straw, and staring at the table. When Viv came back to wipe the table she asked, "So, do you?"
"Do I what?" Reid asked, irritation evident in his voice.
"Want to be alone?"
Reid knew there was a good chance he'd end up at a bar when he left the restaurant because, no, he didn't want to be alone. He'd have a few beers to make the day go away...his version of a holiday tradition. If he picked the right bar, he might even get laid, or at the very least get his dick sucked. Hookups were pretty easy to find on Thanksgiving. Christmas. Everyone in bars on those days was just like him...alone and desperate not to feel that way. Reid sighed and finally let his eyes wander to the window. It was hard to see because of the restaurant light reflecting his own image back at him, but he could see Luke, leaning against his truck. Waiting for me.
"Are you in love with him?" Vivian asked for the second time.
Reid looked at the waitress, He hated nosy people. What gave her the right to start asking these kinds of personal questions? Then again, she was a stranger, and what harm was there in telling a stranger a secret...someone who he would never see again...? He nodded, just slightly. "Yeah." He glanced out the window again. "Fuck."
"Then why are you still sitting here?"
Reid looked at the waitress. He nodded and stood up, putting the cap on his head. "How much do you make, working today?"
"That's a rude question, hon. I only work because we need the extra money. We have two girls who will be in college before we know it." Reid stared at her. "Double time."
"Which is....?"
"Let's just say that your tip made it more than triple time."
"Fair enough," Reid replied, reaching into the inside pocket of his coat and pulling out his checkbook. "You have a pen?"
Viv pulled a pen out of her apron pocket. "What are you doing?"
Reid took the pen and began writing. "What's your husband's name?"
"Clayton."
"What's he do?"
"He works construction. Right now he's working on that new hospital addition at Memorial. Are you familiar with it?"
Reid shook his head at the coincidence. "I happen to know a lot about that new wing. It's being head up by some hot shot from Dallas. And your daughters?" Reid asked, signing his name at the bottom of the check.
"Ashley and Michelle. They are thirteen and sixteen."
Reid nodded, tore the check from the checkbook and folded it in half. He handed it to Vivian with the pen. "You can fill in the payee with your full name. It's dated November 15th of 2011. You can cash it then. Tell your boss that you're not working next year. It should be enough to cover what you need for Thanksgiving dinner too." Reid returned his checkbook to his pocket and zipped up his coat. "Look at it after I leave." Viv seemed stunned into silence, looking down at the folded piece of paper in her hand. Reid picked up the bag with the pie in it and started walking to the door.
"Why are you doing this?" the waitress asked, her voice the smallest it had been since Reid walked into the restaurant an hour and a half earlier.
Reid turned around and shrugged. He didn't even know why himself.
"I'll never forget this. You're an angel."
Reid laughed for the first time all day. "Lady, I'm no angel...believe me."
Vivian shook her head, tears in her eyes. "But you are. I can see your wings."
*********************************************************************
Luke watched Reid approaching him, his head down. When he arrived, he placed the bag with the pie in it on the hood of Luke's truck. He looked up at the sky, and Luke watched the soft, cold rain hitting Reid's face before he lowered his gaze to Luke's eyes. They stood looking at each other for a moment, neither of them speaking. Reid stepped closer, his eyes searching Luke's. Luke watched their steamy exhales mingle in the cold November air. Reid cocked his head slightly, and Luke watched the blinds go up. In that moment he could see Reid...see right into soul, and all he wanted to do was wrap his arms around him and take care of him forever.
"Reid, I'm so sorry..." But Luke's words were silenced by the firm and insistent press of Reid's lips against his own. They stayed like that for a good amount of time, lips just pressed together, as Reid gripped the sides of Luke's head, and Luke's hands came up to Reid's waist, pulling him closer. The kiss broke and turned into hug, which took Luke by surprise, feeling Reid's entire body against his. He gasped ever so slightly and Reid pulled back to look at him, his eyes glassy.
"Come home with me," Luke said softly, almost a whisper.
Reid nodded and kissed Luke again.