ONE YEAR!
So yesterday was our one year anniversary!! It was really nice. I felt like a five year old I was so happy.....
First we went to class to the specail grappling class. Lot of fun...I think it was the first time i laughed in class...I was paired up with Amanda, and usually I'm a little intimidated by her, but she was laughing and I felt a lot better.
After class Eric was holding my hands and telling me what we were going to do when we got home: he was going to make me shrimp scampi, have chocolate milk, salad, and for dessert we were going to have chocolate krispy kremes (mmmmm....). AND! We were actually going to eat at the table, by candlelight, and I would have a small present in the middle. I was so happy that i hugged him really tight and he spun me around...I don't know why but I L O V E that....
So we get back, and lets me int he kitchen...and in the middle is a vase with one rose in it...it was so beautiful. I'm a person who goes towards simplicity: I'd prefer one two small flowers than a huge bouquet of flowers. We ate, he was all adorable...and it was nice.
After we were on the couch and I gave him a backrub...I think he liked it...he was in thought. He kept laughing and saying, "hahaha they kept making fun of nathan because he's a white belt (some kid at our class)" "wanna know what's funny about that jess? he's a blackbelt in another style...and they were all like, 'you're inexperienced we can make fun of you' hahahahaha...pffffft he doesnt have a black belt attidtude." I just kinda looked at him and he went off saying how when he's blackbelt he wants to do this and that with the students..."i want to be the best...and then be better...." He always says that...all the time.
There was something that upset me in the night though...I had to get going. he wanted to sleep because he has an interview today. I said "I love you" to him...and he let go of me when I said it and said goodnight.....
I went home and sat in my car and cried.
I want to hear "I love you " in return. It upsets me because I wonder if I ever will hear it....if he will ever love me......but oh well. I appreciate what he did..and I guess I will still remain patient, hoping that I will be treated the way i should be as he says...loved the way I deserve as he says....
Meh. I'm just surprised that we lasted this long...does that mean anything?
First we went to class to the specail grappling class. Lot of fun...I think it was the first time i laughed in class...I was paired up with Amanda, and usually I'm a little intimidated by her, but she was laughing and I felt a lot better.
After class Eric was holding my hands and telling me what we were going to do when we got home: he was going to make me shrimp scampi, have chocolate milk, salad, and for dessert we were going to have chocolate krispy kremes (mmmmm....). AND! We were actually going to eat at the table, by candlelight, and I would have a small present in the middle. I was so happy that i hugged him really tight and he spun me around...I don't know why but I L O V E that....
So we get back, and lets me int he kitchen...and in the middle is a vase with one rose in it...it was so beautiful. I'm a person who goes towards simplicity: I'd prefer one two small flowers than a huge bouquet of flowers. We ate, he was all adorable...and it was nice.
After we were on the couch and I gave him a backrub...I think he liked it...he was in thought. He kept laughing and saying, "hahaha they kept making fun of nathan because he's a white belt (some kid at our class)" "wanna know what's funny about that jess? he's a blackbelt in another style...and they were all like, 'you're inexperienced we can make fun of you' hahahahaha...pffffft he doesnt have a black belt attidtude." I just kinda looked at him and he went off saying how when he's blackbelt he wants to do this and that with the students..."i want to be the best...and then be better...." He always says that...all the time.
There was something that upset me in the night though...I had to get going. he wanted to sleep because he has an interview today. I said "I love you" to him...and he let go of me when I said it and said goodnight.....
I went home and sat in my car and cried.
I want to hear "I love you " in return. It upsets me because I wonder if I ever will hear it....if he will ever love me......but oh well. I appreciate what he did..and I guess I will still remain patient, hoping that I will be treated the way i should be as he says...loved the way I deserve as he says....
Meh. I'm just surprised that we lasted this long...does that mean anything?