Grandma Take Me Home
Finally, I have a chance to write. And by chance to write I mean one where I am not freakishly lazy. Although, I have forgotten nearly everything that has happened to me. Behold the problems that arise when I freakish;y ignore my livejournal. Eh, unmotivation consumes me, what can I say.
We had an hour delay from school yesterday (woopadeedo) and all that really stemmed from that was treachery on the way to the bus stop and feeling supremely hazy all day. Pretty much, the same hazy feeling has followed me into today. After the half day, Lex, Danielle and I stopped at KFC (can you say ritual?) where we were joined shortly after by Kate and Jenn. Kate proceded to almost die ... whilst laughing. Deja vu because the very same thing has happened to her in my presence about 10 times before. Stop dying woman! Iono, it was grand and everything and I had a good time, but I felt out of sorts for some reason. It wasn't the same and that confused me. And bipolarity is making me angry. Arg. < < Behold my "anger."
However, we did toast Jim Morrison at KFC because it is after all his 61st birthday. And this has me torn on emotions as well. Somber and yet ... not so somber. For a few years on his birthday I always find myself thinking, "Imagine Jim now." I mean, I want his views on how insane the world has become. Like so many of my other rock type idols, I wish he was around to help those who adore him through the crazyness that is the world today. I mean, sure a lot of them basically killed themselves with the excesses of drugs and other such chemicals ... but it was a different time and I refuse to blame them. In any case, there is an extraordinary difference between Morrison's 61st and 60th birthday for me. Last year I was ... freakishly stoned, this year I'm clean. And, I mean it's okay. Not that it wasn't rad last year and all, but iono, hah, I'm too lazy to get high.
Erm. Not that this is by any chance a large problem in my life. But, wow I burnt my finger and it hurts. No. Uhm, Zac. lol, Yeah I'm wasting words on him again. Not that I'm going to divulge the whole situation here by any means, but ... things are just ... the opposite of good with him. I just want him to go to freaking New York, because I think that after a year and a half of knowing him we should at least meet and be cool. Even if we've had a falling out in other parts. That's all. That is all I want to do on New Years- be with him. God damn I'm gay. Why I can't just get with someone here is beyond me. I'm just mad irrational. And no one around digs me anyway. lol, New Britain is gay. And with that ... snoogans.
I am done with this thing we call writing because I feel out of sorts and all I really want to do is lay down. With tea ... or something similar. So I'm goin to put on some Doors, and wish someone was here (ahem) that isn't.
Five to one baby/ One in five/ No one here gets out alive