Holding pattern
No baby yet, and it could be a few weeks still. However, come hell or high water, she will be out by the first, since that's "42 weeks" and the medical community doesn't like prolonging gestation past that (that's when the midwives would be 'obliged' to transfer me to standard care...aka chemical induction and/or C-section...of course, the ladies have a bunch of tricks up their sleeves for making sure that doesn't happen, so I'm not worried.)
Tired, sore. Physically, the last week has been pretty rough. She's been a tad 'less' active, which mostly means that she can't really wind up enough to give me a good punch now that we're pretty much down to her, a couple of pounds of placenta, and a bit over a pint of fluid. I can still put on my own shoes (Fanfare!) by hauling up each leg by the pants cuff, but I tried picking up a pencil off the floor while seated in the car and THAT was horrible, even after I managed to point it up and down using my feet. Last night we walked around WalMart after our final HypnoBirth class, mostly to look at new trash cans and re-stock the medicine cabinet (got a tackle box for the newly fishing obsessed husband on clearance, though). Toward the end something happened, but I don't think it was contractions? She was moving quite a lot and I think her head might have been pinching bladder or cervix or somebody else against my pubic bone. YOW.
Was given a worksheet to fill out at the last HB class, of 'fears and anxieties' to work through with David. Mostly, I'm not very afraid. There's some little niggling doubts that are driving me nuts, and the hormones, oh!, the hormones...those have been bad and like to turn the dial up to 11. The rest of the time it's pretty easy to say, it'll be fine, it'll be what it is, she'll come when she's ready and worrying does nothing. The "big 3" were the same for both David and I (money, relationship changes, and his mysterious health issues)...butI had one more, The One That Garnered a 5/5 on the Likely To Cause Issues On Birth Day...and that's the state of the house. GRAH. WHY CAN I NOT MANAGE MY OWN HOUSEHOLD WHEN I'M NOT EVEN WORKING OR GOING TO SCHOOL?! I have been somewhat depressed and 'tetchy' for the last couple of weeks and while I'd love to blame it on the hormones, I'm pretty sure it has a lot to do with this failure. If I get one room clean, it goes messy again by the time I get another one clean. We have too much STUFF and I have too little discipline. And for a while there I got to be such a bitch about it that David has pretty much given up on helping since he's likely to get his head chewed off for trying. Good job, me. My next job will be a hole-digger. I'm quite good at it...just need some training on how to exit the hole once I've gone in way over my head.
Today, like the last 5 days, I am Bound And Determined to just get the downstairs clean and get everything on the Baby Ready and Birth Ready lists DONE by the end of the day. Little actual hope of success. :( But I seriously, seriously do not want to have a late baby and harder labor because I couldn't just get my act together and clean up.
Oh, but parents on their way! Very happy about that.
Tired, sore. Physically, the last week has been pretty rough. She's been a tad 'less' active, which mostly means that she can't really wind up enough to give me a good punch now that we're pretty much down to her, a couple of pounds of placenta, and a bit over a pint of fluid. I can still put on my own shoes (Fanfare!) by hauling up each leg by the pants cuff, but I tried picking up a pencil off the floor while seated in the car and THAT was horrible, even after I managed to point it up and down using my feet. Last night we walked around WalMart after our final HypnoBirth class, mostly to look at new trash cans and re-stock the medicine cabinet (got a tackle box for the newly fishing obsessed husband on clearance, though). Toward the end something happened, but I don't think it was contractions? She was moving quite a lot and I think her head might have been pinching bladder or cervix or somebody else against my pubic bone. YOW.
Was given a worksheet to fill out at the last HB class, of 'fears and anxieties' to work through with David. Mostly, I'm not very afraid. There's some little niggling doubts that are driving me nuts, and the hormones, oh!, the hormones...those have been bad and like to turn the dial up to 11. The rest of the time it's pretty easy to say, it'll be fine, it'll be what it is, she'll come when she's ready and worrying does nothing. The "big 3" were the same for both David and I (money, relationship changes, and his mysterious health issues)...butI had one more, The One That Garnered a 5/5 on the Likely To Cause Issues On Birth Day...and that's the state of the house. GRAH. WHY CAN I NOT MANAGE MY OWN HOUSEHOLD WHEN I'M NOT EVEN WORKING OR GOING TO SCHOOL?! I have been somewhat depressed and 'tetchy' for the last couple of weeks and while I'd love to blame it on the hormones, I'm pretty sure it has a lot to do with this failure. If I get one room clean, it goes messy again by the time I get another one clean. We have too much STUFF and I have too little discipline. And for a while there I got to be such a bitch about it that David has pretty much given up on helping since he's likely to get his head chewed off for trying. Good job, me. My next job will be a hole-digger. I'm quite good at it...just need some training on how to exit the hole once I've gone in way over my head.
Today, like the last 5 days, I am Bound And Determined to just get the downstairs clean and get everything on the Baby Ready and Birth Ready lists DONE by the end of the day. Little actual hope of success. :( But I seriously, seriously do not want to have a late baby and harder labor because I couldn't just get my act together and clean up.
Oh, but parents on their way! Very happy about that.