my college essay- written in @ 20 minutes. to oglethorpe? tomorrow-
Cool at Your Own Pace?
by Jamie Beth Rosenberg
Ever since she was a child she sensed there was something different about her. The way she would rearrange things for no apparent reason, wash her hands with no regard to how physically dirty they were, and count random things that seemed to have a pattern for her. She was locked in a world where she felt she had no control, so she created her own. She felt helpless, what else could she control?
It began to permeate her every move. She would take longer to get ready in the morning because of rituals she became obsessed with. Her actions no longer made sense and her mind separated from her own desires. She would later become very distracted from these time consuming efforts. Homework was neglected, friends weren't made (or just weren’t kept) and her mental difference only exacerbated any of her family’s tensions.
It's hard for her to remember the smorgasbord of details from her most intense bouts with obsessive-compulsive disorder. They seemed to have taken custody of her mind during very stressful times- though the relaxed times were far and few between. "It" would consume most of her thoughts, or at least affect them- and not a soul would know the fact. They would see her as a hyperactive child, a kid who just didn't really "fit in", or an outcast who would find her place later in life- if she got there.
Said person learned to cope with her impeding character trait. She would get through life however she could- taking whatever social or emotional consequence came her way. Her friends wouldn't understand her and her parents would look at her differently- or would they? They too were all affected by what is medically called a psychological disorder. Would they understand it? Could they understand it? Their situations were variedly different from hers. Or did they?
She'd walk to the left of her friends, ask insanely detailed questions (Which Target did you go to?), trace the letters on signs with the writing utensil in her brain, and do other things to keep her out of reality. Or was her reality just as valid as the next persons'?
She lacked a lot of experiences her peers had but because of that she also gained a sensational amount of compassion and the attitude of trying to understand others. Maybe she was just born this way- or born to be this way now.
Now she tries to see the positive with all that she experiences. She tries to love everyone she can‑ even though she can't all the time. She knows she's not perfect but she also knows she is human. She sees life as something to experience and not hesitate away from. She knows her chemistry or learned behaviors affect her reality, but she can't coalesce with any other than her own. You see, it is about her and how she affects others and this life, not how others want her to. She is cool at her own pace. Why can't we all be cool at our own pace?
by Jamie Beth Rosenberg
Ever since she was a child she sensed there was something different about her. The way she would rearrange things for no apparent reason, wash her hands with no regard to how physically dirty they were, and count random things that seemed to have a pattern for her. She was locked in a world where she felt she had no control, so she created her own. She felt helpless, what else could she control?
It began to permeate her every move. She would take longer to get ready in the morning because of rituals she became obsessed with. Her actions no longer made sense and her mind separated from her own desires. She would later become very distracted from these time consuming efforts. Homework was neglected, friends weren't made (or just weren’t kept) and her mental difference only exacerbated any of her family’s tensions.
It's hard for her to remember the smorgasbord of details from her most intense bouts with obsessive-compulsive disorder. They seemed to have taken custody of her mind during very stressful times- though the relaxed times were far and few between. "It" would consume most of her thoughts, or at least affect them- and not a soul would know the fact. They would see her as a hyperactive child, a kid who just didn't really "fit in", or an outcast who would find her place later in life- if she got there.
Said person learned to cope with her impeding character trait. She would get through life however she could- taking whatever social or emotional consequence came her way. Her friends wouldn't understand her and her parents would look at her differently- or would they? They too were all affected by what is medically called a psychological disorder. Would they understand it? Could they understand it? Their situations were variedly different from hers. Or did they?
She'd walk to the left of her friends, ask insanely detailed questions (Which Target did you go to?), trace the letters on signs with the writing utensil in her brain, and do other things to keep her out of reality. Or was her reality just as valid as the next persons'?
She lacked a lot of experiences her peers had but because of that she also gained a sensational amount of compassion and the attitude of trying to understand others. Maybe she was just born this way- or born to be this way now.
Now she tries to see the positive with all that she experiences. She tries to love everyone she can‑ even though she can't all the time. She knows she's not perfect but she also knows she is human. She sees life as something to experience and not hesitate away from. She knows her chemistry or learned behaviors affect her reality, but she can't coalesce with any other than her own. You see, it is about her and how she affects others and this life, not how others want her to. She is cool at her own pace. Why can't we all be cool at our own pace?