(no subject)
So after four months of weening....i'm paxil-free!!! and have been since may 19. i feel pretty good, and the big blow of withdrawal symptoms i was expecting never came. i didn't even mean to completely stop when i did, but my family and i went to massanutten (lower appalacians in virginia) for a week and i FORGOT my meds in new york. i've NEVER not traveled with them, so when i realized i'd left them there was a moment of panic, then i reminded myself the panic was only in my head, and i'd only been taking them only four days anyway, so i just tried to forget about it. i still thought about it every day, but i felt okay. but the tricky part was every time i'd feel a little queasy, or winded, or extremely tired, I never knew if it was from paxil, or from being so high up in the mountains, or just simply from being an out-of-shape fat ass. i like to think it's a bit of all of those reasons.
it's so weird that after 7 years, i don't have to remember to take ANYTHING in the morning.
the week in massanutten was cool. it was definitely nice to be out of The Busy City and out in the mountains where deer and squirrels grazed together in the backyard of the townhouse (which freakishly reminded me of The Shining, and i was scared shitless every time i was left alone there at night, or when i was lying in my bed about to go to sleep) we were staying in, and all there was to do was play tennis, ride horses, hike, and other Outdoors-y Stuff I don't normally do. The only problem was, toward the end of the week, there was STILL only tennis, horse-riding, and hiking to do, and we started to get a little bored and vacation-fatigued. and we couldn't even go horseback riding because my 6'4 muscle-bound, GNC-enthusiast brother exceeded the weight limit, which was ridiculous, because we've gone before. but i guess they don't feed the horses in virginia the same way they do in arizona. or perhaps virginia horse-feeders are also feeling the recession and therefore have to lower the weight limit to 240 lbs, so, in fact, it is george w.'s fault that we couldn't go horseback riding =P
daniel's girlfriend came down for just the weekend, and then my parents left in the middle of the week because they had to work, but then my dad came back on thursday and the three of us came back to delaware on yesterday. so the energy fluctuated throughout the week, but overall it was fun. and relaxing. i go back to new york tomorrow. though i sort of hate living there--i curse the city daily--and i always get a little anxious when i have to leave the nest again, i do find myself, surprisingly, wanting to get back to my regular life, mustapha, and my cat. and back to work, because i feel weird being unproductive for too long.
i finally saw JUNO last night! so good! i'm going to watch THE KITE RUNNER today. my mom and i went out and rented movies last night after i realized the few friends i still hang out with here weren't around, and while i was bummed about it for a bit, it turned out to be a nice night, just mom and me, and i was glad i could be here because otherwise, she would've been home alone.
it's so weird that after 7 years, i don't have to remember to take ANYTHING in the morning.
the week in massanutten was cool. it was definitely nice to be out of The Busy City and out in the mountains where deer and squirrels grazed together in the backyard of the townhouse (which freakishly reminded me of The Shining, and i was scared shitless every time i was left alone there at night, or when i was lying in my bed about to go to sleep) we were staying in, and all there was to do was play tennis, ride horses, hike, and other Outdoors-y Stuff I don't normally do. The only problem was, toward the end of the week, there was STILL only tennis, horse-riding, and hiking to do, and we started to get a little bored and vacation-fatigued. and we couldn't even go horseback riding because my 6'4 muscle-bound, GNC-enthusiast brother exceeded the weight limit, which was ridiculous, because we've gone before. but i guess they don't feed the horses in virginia the same way they do in arizona. or perhaps virginia horse-feeders are also feeling the recession and therefore have to lower the weight limit to 240 lbs, so, in fact, it is george w.'s fault that we couldn't go horseback riding =P
daniel's girlfriend came down for just the weekend, and then my parents left in the middle of the week because they had to work, but then my dad came back on thursday and the three of us came back to delaware on yesterday. so the energy fluctuated throughout the week, but overall it was fun. and relaxing. i go back to new york tomorrow. though i sort of hate living there--i curse the city daily--and i always get a little anxious when i have to leave the nest again, i do find myself, surprisingly, wanting to get back to my regular life, mustapha, and my cat. and back to work, because i feel weird being unproductive for too long.
i finally saw JUNO last night! so good! i'm going to watch THE KITE RUNNER today. my mom and i went out and rented movies last night after i realized the few friends i still hang out with here weren't around, and while i was bummed about it for a bit, it turned out to be a nice night, just mom and me, and i was glad i could be here because otherwise, she would've been home alone.