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[autumnalmonk]

Gee, I'm ever so fulfilled knowing that you've recently had such fabulous poly group sex.  Really, reading the details of your latest sexual encounters just makes my life complete.

(Now if I can just figure out what you mean amid all those grammatical abuses and cryptic designations...)

Comments

[leora]

I actually had a similar event just happen to me. It was my night with one partner, and my other partner's other girlfriend had some really good news. So, we decided to all go out to dinner together to celebrate. There was no jealousy or anxiety... well, until it seemed like it was going to take a while to get our food and we were rather hungry and we'd be late getting home to feed and medicate the cat. But other than that, it went quite well.

And to think, I almost wasn't going to tell the whole world!

[fallconsmate]

I think the most fun we (ex hubby and I) used to have was doing the group dinner thing. The 2 of us, son, daughter and b/f, hubby's sweetie and her son, my otherlove. That or the couple of times we double-dated with his sweetie and mine, all of us having good conversation.

Really good conversation is better than group sex, in my experience. :)

[leora]

I've quite often enjoyed being with a small group of people I am close to. But group sex isn't my thing. I am fine with other people enjoying it. Lots of people do all sorts of things that I don't care for. But I prefer to enjoy each of my partners separately. The thought of having more than one sexually at the same time (not just in the sense of having a relationship, but actually during the having sex bits) is unappealing to me. Which is likely for the best since I'm straight, one of my partners is straight, neither of my partners is the slightest bit attracted to the other, and it'd just be such a horrible experience all around.

I do quite like good conversation though - individually or in groups. And some more intimate activities with a partner. I dunno, maybe I'm just not sufficiently poly. Maybe it's more like really, really hyperactive serial monogamy. :) I just switch between partners really, really often, back and forth between the same two generally. Now I feel like I'm stuck in some bizarre ping pong relationship model.

[fallconsmate]

nah, you're doing poly that is right for *you*. :D nothing in the world wrong with that.

someone who can easily hold up their end of a conversation is a REALLY great thing as far as i'm concerned.

[kdsorceress]

Maybe it's more like really, really hyperactive serial monogamy.

Oh thank god, I'm not alone.

I have determined through multiple trials, that despite being attracted to damn near everyone and really enjoying sex, threesomes are intensely not the thing for me. It's actively stressful, in ways that cause me to have to leave halfway through. Part of me is still holding out for the perfect one, but I'm not really willing to do anything to make it happen, because nope!

~Sor

[meganeko_mausuu]

What ladytwnks said. It's how poly works for you. Personally, as far as I know, you're more in the majority with that. I'm not, but that's MY poly. So long as everyone involved is comfortable and happy with the arrangements in question most of the time, that's what counts, right?

[leora]

That's usually my view. I find it very difficult to judge relationships from the outside. I try to only do so under extreme circumstances (such as if I suspect a friend is in an abusive relationship) and then I try to do so carefully and by gathering info.

[meganeko_mausuu]

I would love to know how you manage to do that without being horribly late getting out the door. If it's just Bunny and myself, we manage alright, but you add even one more partner to the mix, and we're scrambling, and always at least a few minutes late. Add more than one extra partner, and the lateness increases exponentially.

[fallconsmate]

*someone* has to be clock keeper. *some*one has to set the time, tell everyone, and if they get there late, too damn bad. 5 minutes with a phone call to say "i'm coming"? fine. wandering in 30 minutes late and wondering why everyone else has gone ahead and ordered, and are eating their entres? too damn bad.

i'm diabetic, that sort of helps. we KNOW that i have to eat, and we KNOW that once i've taken my insulin i have to eat within 15 minutes or so. and if you get into the habit of saying/following through on "we need to leave in X amount of time" you can manage the family, all of it, extended bits and all.