family time is for suckers

Jan 07, 2007 10:52

I know this is a lot of complaining about someone complaining--but I need to fucking vent this shit out because it really fucked me up.

Yesterday my Mom, Aunt Tique and cousin Eric went shopping then dinner. Sounds like a nice family day out, right? WRONG. Seriously, I was on the verge of tears because of how annoyed and frustrated I was. It will be a day I won't forget for a long time and I don't think I could hang out with my cousin for a long time after it.

We went to Kohl's and it was okay. My Aunt and Eric out of the house? Yeah, it was 72 degrees in Jersey for a reason--Thank them because it's a miracle they went out. Anyway! Kohl's was okay.. until we were about to leave. This is the turning point and had I known I would have put the pedal to the metal in my shitty car. Shitty you ask? Explainations later.

My cousin has a slight case of h-pylori. My Mom has a severe case of it. You have to take certain meds and eat certain foods--one of which is not pork which my Aunt fed him the night before. Why? Because people like to live dangerously. So, because of that before we leave Kohl's his stomach starts to act up and he runs off to the bathroom. Which is fine. I don't care because I know how it is.

Then we get to Olive Garden which was an hour wait. Psh, mere minutes compared to what my friends and I have waited in the past. Because we are all hungry we decide to wait. I had to explain to my Aunt very slowly that it was Saturday night and that ALL places would be like this. "Can't we go somewhere close by?" All places are like this.. It's Saturday. "Can't we go somewhere in Bayonne?" All places are like this. "Can't we go somewhere on Broadway?" A-L-L. It's Saturday! Sorry the last time you went out people still carried around clubs and wore animal pelts. And even though it was slightly annoying.. It was fine. Until my cousin started complaining about waiting that long. It never ended for the whole hour sitting there. Even when this hot girl next to me was talking about how she has sex--I couldn't listen because of him. Then he ran off to the bathroom. Finally a break!

When he returns from the bathroom his pants are totally undone. I wish I could have seen my face because I know I must have done some type of look. Though I wanted to say something I just kept it to myself. But if you happen to have been at Olive Garden and saw a 21 year old dude walking around with his pants undone and his belt flopping around--Hi! That was my cousin. Don't think he is a big weirdo or anything.

So, the complaining does. not. end. Him running back and forth to the bathroom does. not. end. Him telling us he couldn't go to the bathroom does. not. end. Him complaining about it, the wait, his stomach pains, how his mother dragged him out of the house, about me talking about global warming, and the color blue does. not. end. My Mom was like.. Eric, it's just gas. Calm down. Then she went to explain about other shit and that he really is a pussy. Just when I was about to call it all off they rang for us to come in and I could already taste the chicken marsala! I thought once we got him in there and settled to eat something everything would be fine. WRONG.

Now we have to find him something to eat.. It was easier to find Saddam Hussein running around in the desert than it was to find this kid a fucking bite to eat. I simply suggested that he have chicken marsala without the sauce. Chicken and potatoes people.. He just made the most annoying sigh and face and then shook his head. So, I was done I wasn't going to baby this bitch. My Aunt went through the whole menu four times and my Mom just sipped her pepsi to herself. Well, my Aunt was suggesting some off the wall shit and then my Mom finally suggested some grilled dish--which would have been fine too. All of the sudden he has some outburst at the table and states he'll eat at home. FINE. I totally could not stand another minute of it and just went off. I told my Mom not to suggest anything that he didn't want to eat and then I told my Aunt the same thing. Just so we didn't have to hear anything more. Well, everything should have been fine after that. Except my cousin then gives me attitude saying I was trying to force him to eat too. That I was suggesting all this food. I was like, "I just told you about one thing. They keep going on about it." And all the while he just kept repeating "you too! you too! you too!" I swear to God.. had we not been sitting on opposite sides of the table I seriously would have punched the shit out of his face. And even though I contained myself that much.. I did manage to say "Fuck You!" Which surprised the hell out of everyone at the table.. Good. I'm glad I got my point across.

Once I said the big F-U I had a meltdown and told the table how stressed I was. Frustrated. Annoyed. And no longer had any type of appetite. That I wanted to leave. Of course they all said "No." You know though, I find it funny when people who didn't drive or don't drive or whatever the case may be tell YOU, the driver, they aren't leaving. Bitch if you ain't in the car when I pull away--then you ain't in the car! But I knew my Mom wanted to eat so I just said whatever. I was hungry too, I'll admit, but I seriously couldn't stand to be there.

So the ordering takes place and it turns into this huge circus because Eric can't eat anything. After a minute or two the fucking chef of Olive Garden comes out to the table to ask what we wanted. Who knew they even had real chefs, but it's good to know. Also, guess what the chef suggested to him to eat? Chicken Marsala--minus the sauce. WHAT. THE. FUCK!?!! And he happily agrees. We could have saved all this trouble if big head fucking listened to me in the first place.

Then the drinks come and he is complaining about his iced tea and how it sucks. Then how he is just going to take the food home. How he can't eat. Then he runs to the bathroom 5 times.. coming back each time with his pants UNDONE for the whole place to see. Then the food comes, the food he didn't want. The food he was going to wrap up to take home and eat there--for some reason. The food is there one minute and gone the next. This bitch inhaled the food like that. All the while my Aunt told him to eat slow because it'll just upset his stomach more. Did he listen? No. Of course not. So the complaining stopped for a minute while he ate and as soon as he finished started up again. I couldn't even enjoy my fucking meal. Afterwards my Mom asks about dessert and I didn't want any--which I stated. She gets her dessert and it was something I never tried and you know people always take a taste of something new. So, I took the tiniest taste and I didn't like it and said so. My cousin was like, "Then why did you eat it?" Bitch, had I known it tasted like shit I WOULDN'T have. That is the point of TRYING something. "I thought you didn't want dessert." I wanted to throw a fucking fork in his eye. I told him I didn't want dessert, but it was just a taste so don't worry about it. I also said you didn't want dinner, but you fucking sucked it down. "Well, people have a change of heart." was his reply and I said Exactly.. I had a change of heart just like you did and wanted to try the cake. Is that all right with you?

I could not get out of that place quicker. Then on the way home I stopped at Old Navy and it was 9:32. I just wanted to see if they were open--which they weren't. BUT the fucking complaining opened up again. "What are you doing? Where are we going?" The plan in the first place was to go to Kohl's, eat dinner, then go to Old Navy. Did you forget?

Then when we are about home my Aunt--Who wasn't very annoying today except when she was babying fuck head starts to complain about my car. Bitch, you don't have a car and you should be happy I am driving you somewhere in it. There is a turn on 440 South that the pavement makes a weird noise when you drive over it and she was saying how my car sucks. She hates sitting in the back seat--Let me move over then so you could sit on the drivers seat then. How the back seats are high up in the car. It's scary. She could see everything. It's scary. It's bumpy. It's scary. It's uncomfortable. Saying I should try sitting in the back seat to see how it feels. Okay, how do you suggest I drive then, asshole?

This is New Jersey. THE ROADS ARE BUMPY! This is a truck. IT'S HIGH UP! What. The. Fuck.

That was the straw that broke the camels back because just before we got home I let them know exactly what I thought. I told my Aunt she should be happy to even be in the car that took her somewhere. I also told the both of them, especially Eric, how it was the most frustating, annoying, agrivated time I have ever spent in my life and that I will never take the both of them out ever again. Then these mother fuckers acted like they had not a clue why I was saying this all. "Why?" My cousin asked, "I didn't do anything?" You complained the whole time! "No, I didn't!" I have never heard anyone complain more and I live with Mike who complains about every tiny thing. Then they were saying how they didn't complain and got all huffy before leaving to go to their house. Even my Mom was saying how she had an awful time and she never says that shit to peoples faces!

Once it was all over and I was home with my Mom I had to talk with her about how stressed I was. She couldn't believe how the day turned out and declared she too would never invite the both of them out again. That Eric could just stay home if that is going to be the case, which is sad in one hand and good in another. I also know that he will never forget this and never let any of us forget it! He'll always make references to it for the rest of his life just like he makes them about shit that happened when we were like 7.

What I'm really waiting for is my Aunt to come downstairs to ask why I felt like that, why I said fuck you to Eric, why I had an outburst..

This post does not do the day justice because I simply could not write what he was saying. It was most ridiculous and made me want to cry! I know it isn't over either which is another sad thing. I really don't think I could see my cousin though for like a month because I'll just have to go crazy on his ass.

And once I got back from the movies with Kevin and Ro, I was still stressed. I smoked a half of joint and two bowls from the bong which is alot for me in a short amount of time. It was like the first time I just felt like I REALLY needed to smoke. Oh well..

Fuckin cock-assss!
Previous post Next post
Up