I dont wanna speak these words. I dont want to make things anyworse
Pshhh havent updated since ummm monday morning, but alls well. well monday i didn't do anything reallys, went to meijer with my sisters and got makeup and the new whitestripes cd. I dont care if nobody likes them. cuz i've had multiple people tell me how bad they are. But ya know what? shove it up your ass, cuz i'll like whoever the fuck I want. Grrr im in such a bad mood.
Yesterday.. tuesday, was an okay day. i dont want to elaborate mainly cuz i cant remember what all happend exactly. Today however was not so good. first off, i looked like crap today, wich really doesnt normally bother me, but today, it did. its just one of those days i guess. i wrote my english essay last night, its not due for another week, and we just got the assgnment yesterday to. But i dont give a fuck. Cuz its our poetry unit. I wrote my bedroom poem to. ms vandusen said they were both FANTASTIC and OUTSTANDING. and wondered why i didnt put that much effort into my other papers. i simply told her that when i'm not intersted in something, i dont put my all into it, because i have no opinion whatsoever. But with my tkm paper and now the poetry unit.. she should be expecting much more from me. Cuz its just what i like... anyway. Well i'm in a bad mood.
You said you woulndt ever ditch me, or completely forget about me, like the other guys did. But you broke that promise. because you never talk to me, unless its conveniant for you. But i'm not going to put up with that shit. you only want to talk to me when she's not around, and barely even then. Its good to know now, that i cant trust a damn thing you promise me anymore. Thanks. And you even said you wanted our friendship back to how it used to be. looks like your screwed, cuz i give up. i knew this would happen anyway. it was only a matter of time.
((i think i just lost one of the greatest people to ever be in my life. but suddenly, i feel absolutely nothing... as if this is how its supposed to be. But, how can losing someone i've had for what seems like forever, become meant to be? It shouldnt end this way))
((tiger lily))
we drive tonight, and you are by my side. We're talking about our lives, like we've known each other forever. the time flies by, with the sound of your voice. its close to paradise, with the end surely near. if i could only stop the car and hold onto you, and never let go... i'll never let go. as we round the corner to your house you turned to me and said, "i'll be going through withdrawl of you for this one night we have spent." and, i want to speak these words but i guess i'll just bite my tongue, and accept "someday, somehow" as the words that we'll hang from. and i... don't want to speak these words. cause i, don't want to make things anyworse. why does tonite, have to end? why don't we hit restart, and pause it at our favorite parts. we'll skip the goodbyes. if i had it my way, i'd turn the car around and runaway, just you and i. and i... don't want to speak these words. cause i, don't want to make things anyworse.