Weekend's Past

Oct 25, 2004 10:34

I woke up at six-thirty in the morning. Which one a weekend for me is impressive, I generally wake up late in the day to the point where my head feels funny and the world seems cocked up. I made breakfast which consisted of homefries and sausage and eggs. My girlfriend not feeling that good, opted for the eggs and sausage and stayed away from the homefries because of the over powering smell of fresh garlic. I gave a plate to her son, who was barely waking up.

Her son, Devon was turning eight today (Monday), and since children never have birthdays on the week day, I spent my time at my girlfriend son's birthday party on Saturday. He had a jumping castle, a bubble machine and a cotton candy machine. I didn't know about the latter two, but I did know about the former.

I tired to eat hot food on my birthday but I knew that would be impossible, and it was, my Aunt called. She wished my well for a half an hour. The eggs went from steam to warm, and the surprisingly the homefries stayed hot. After I ate, I threw on some pants and went out side to rake the yard. There had been some storms that had flown through Phoenix during the week and they had made a shit of the yard. Melissa, my girlfriend, her brother had taken to painting and right now he was painting the cottage where she lived. The place hasn't seen a coat of paint since 1967.

Devon had only one real chore at his mom's and past that it was DVDs, skateboards, XBox, television and comicbooks for him. His only job to do was pick up the land mines that were left by the family dog, Daisy. There was only one left for him to pick up. It took him 45 minutes to do this task. He has the attention span of a coked up gnat. At one point I told him today was only a party and that he wasn't eight yet, but if he wanted to reach Monday he had to clean up that dog shit.

It was relatively early, and I still hadn't had my coffee.

My dad called, he mentioned in passing that my grandmother was in the hospital and that it didn't look good. I knew this, my sister had told me this two days earlier. She was in town too, so it meant that whatever dragged her out of La La Land was serious. He also told me about his truck being stolen from the hospital. I knew this too and my sister and I had laughed about this at the time.

He asked my age again, this year he remembered to call me on my birthday at least, he thought that was 35. I told him that he Depends were on the wrong side and we laughed. It was a long conversation by our standards, it lasted fifteen minutes.

Then people start to arrive. Family at first, then the kids from Devon's school. I ran into the shower to shave and whatnot while Melissa picked up her friend Sarah. The kids varied from size and shape, but all of them had the volume up at seven or eight and few that came later were pushing the knob past where it could go.

I was asked, well let's not mix words here, I was thrusted upon the cotton candy machine. It was to be my sacred duty to dole out old woman's hair. I was given this task probably because I was the tallest among them, barring Melissa's brother, Jon.

The kids ran around for hours, I was thinking that towards the end of the whole affair that they would become dog tired and just sleep for their parents. It did seem about the time this was happening, the kids tiring out, they told me to start the cotton candy machine. Three girls who came with Devon's dad came to life and started to become more obnoxious than what anyone could believe possible. A three year old snuck in line and had taken from my cotton candy covered hand to bee-hives of hair. From there on out the kids was Beavis for the remaining hour.

I on the other hand looked like I had been molested and raped by spider bukakke party. I felt stupid and looked twice as bad. The only consolation was the lick that my girlfriend gave my face. It made me want to spool cotton candy on my pecker.

The kids began to huddle around the mountain of presents. One of the kids, Patrick was a little to cuddly with Devon. This kid Patrick was a bit of spaz. He went himself in the jumping castle and didn't notice it. It was like he has spilled a bit of water on his shoe. Well, he was getting cuddly with Devon like most people get cuddly before going to bed. Devon didn't like that he was cuddly, it was like watching Jughead battle big Ethel.

Everything started to wind down. People left, some of the kids were vibrating from the sugar. I tired to get Devon to drink some more Mountain dew before he left with his dad, y'know, so they can have some fun all night.

At this point in time, all I wanted to do was go to sleep. Well, hose off the cotton candy and then go to sleep. Instead I asked to get some coffee and comic books.

The next day I would have to go and face my grandmother in the hospital.
Previous post Next post
Up