Ok ok, FINE! I’ll post something. I've got nothing to say, but I’ve been bugged into posting. I’ll give it to you.
A recent attempt to learn a song has reminded me of how I feel about music theory. If I can figure it out, I’ll post a little bit of what I’ve written to explain things to myself.
These are how I think of things and what they are normally called.
Tonic: Middle
Subdominant: Up
Dominant: Down
The Middle chord is the same as the key that the song is in. The Up chord is 5 semitones above that, the Down chord is 5 semitones below the Middle. This makes all three adjacent to each other on the circle of fifths.
There are three chords in a song, the middle, one chord up, and one chord down. Going up from the the up chord takes you to the down chord. Going down from the down chord takes you to the Up chord. This means they are oriented as such:
...
Middle
Down
Up
Middle
Down
Up
Middle
...
There are 3 ways a song can move through the chords, Up, Down, and Alternating. They look like such:
Middle, Up, Down, Middle,...
Middle, Down, Up, Middle,...
Middle, Up, Middle, Down, Middle...
Each chord has a minor equivalent.
Submediant: Minor Middle
Supertonic: Minor Up
Mediant: Minor Down
The minors are three semitones below their equivalent, and each may be substituted for it's equivalent major chord in the progression. For some reason, the minor down is rarely used.
Key changes add complication to songs. The easiest way to do this is to use the major form of the minor equivalent of one of the chords.
I don't have a name for the subtonic or the leading tone yet, so I usually just think of them as a quick modulation or ornamentation, but they aren’t usually important.
That's all there is to music.
I'd love to hear what other people think about how i think of music.