Jun 18, 2006 20:50
so this whole jaw surgery/genioplasty was an interesting experience. i was not prepared for what i had to wake up to in that recovery room and deal with. all in all, it was an 8 hour surgery and it left me with 9 titanium screws in my jaw. the right side of my face is more swollen then the left because in the process of the surgery that right side of my jaw fractured and required more work and more screws. waking up was terrible. i could not swallow without wanting to cry because i had to be intubated and i could barely see because my face was so puffed up and swollen. i'm not saying all this in a completely negative and bitchy tone, i just thought it'd be nice to get out the whole experience somewhere.
it was very hard, that first night in the hospital. i kept thinking "is this really happening to me? is this really my face?" i was hurting and terrified when i got the sensation that i was about to throw up which would not be a fun thing, throwing up with my teeth forced closed with rubber bands. it slowly became easier to take a few sips of water and even sit up in bed. i was in the hospital for two nights, and the whole time i just kept thinking "susie, it only gets easier from here." i said this looking back on how far i'd already come in just 48 hours. i was really proud of my progress. for some reason, this experience has made me a much calmer and happier person. i seem to be enjoying the little things in life a bit more. a little more patient and a little kinder.
it's getting a little easier to talk now. i can drink without using a syringe and i'm starting to feel my lips. i look forward to harvesting my herb garden and scooting around the neighborhood this summer. lots of iced tea and polaroids (i finally got my new camera!)
i've also decided to start a zine. i've been thinking about it for awhile after coming across a few online, but i was reluctant because there is a nice girl who was in a class of mine that created one. i kept wanting to start one but didn't want to start anything or have her get upset because, well i guess having two in the same city? i'm not sure what i thought. now that i think about it more and research it further i've come to the decision to do it. why not? there can be more than one zine in the 01085.
i'm going to call it tollbooth apple and it's going to have book & movie reviews, vegan recipes, favorite movie quotes, poetry, my own photography & crafts, favorite polaroids of friends, life, summer, etc., diy & herb ideas, favorite smoothie recipes (since that's what i'll be living on for 6 weeks) and any other goodies i come up with in the process. it should be a really nice and fun project for me and a great way to use up all the free time i'm going to have. yay! wish me luck. :o)