making love
What's the difference between Sex and making love? I would submit to you (he says in his Rod Serling voice) that sex is one of three parts to making love.
Part 1: This is my favorite part. It's that time you spend with the other, telling her how beautiful she is to you, though she may no think that. Running your hand over her curves, carressing her face, whispering into her ears things she may deny about herself, but you know are true. How she arouses you, makes you feel good, how your hand enjoys touching every part of her body, what her eyes do for you, how her voice makes you quiver. Depending on the couple, it might be the time you tell her what a slut she is and then telling her what it is you are going to do to her, word for word. All this raises the anticipation, prepares the both of you for part 2.
Part 2: The Sex. That's what my youngest son once refered to it as. It's the time that you consumate the act of love. It's how you "show" her exactly what it is that she does for you. It may be slow. It maybe hard and fast. It could be tender and caring. It might be with a paddle and restraints. It's whatever you make it.
Part 3: The Concecration. It occurs after "The Sex", when you've spent your energy on each other and now are ready to just melt into each others arms. Passing a smile between each other. Telling the other how good they made you feel. You may close your eyes, cuddled up or part 3 might lead back to part 2 again. Whichever it might be, you are simply putting the exclamation point on at the end of Making Love!
All this is easy when the relationship is new, but time takes it's toll. Work, kids, time pressures, bills and other anxieties of life disrupt the process. After time, you forget about part 1 and part 3 and go directly to part 2. Why, cause their are too many other more important things to do, or so you think. If you aren't careful, part 2 slowly dwindles away as well. It's no longer enjoyable for one of you and so you both suffer. We blame the other for lost love. No longer do we feel desirable to the other, cause we skip 1 and 3. What we may have longed to hear, is no longer said. Self doubt creeps in. We wither as two separte souls, rather than just one.
All this doesn't make me wise, it just shows the road I have traveled. I hope I help to light a path for some of you. My only advise, don't wait for the other to initiate what you desire. Take control of your life. Somebody has to be the one, why not you?