Stupid time change...
So this time change has totally confused me. I've been staying up quite a bit later than usual, which is really not good for tomorrow b/c I have to get up early. And that's probably a good thing b/c I've gotten used to sleeping in and on Saturday, when my real life starts up again, I'll be in for a rude surprise.
I kind of wish I'd gone somewhere for spring break, Dallas, the city, the concrete, the tall buildings are starting to get to me. I love for the beach or mountains or forest, a field of wildflowers, something other than the lawn on campus. =) Although the tulips do add a little something. I'm not really ready for spring break to be over...it's been nice to have some time. Granted my grand plans of getting my apartment clean and tons of school work doesn't hasn't exactly happened. And my spring break hasn't been terrible by any means, I've had some phenomenal hang out time with people.
I've been missing Russia quite a bit this past week. I'm really thankful for technology and being able to keep in contact with my friends in Russia (and Livvy in Canada). But sometimes talking to them just makes me miss them more. At Bible study tonight we went over Romans 12 and you know I admitted to the group that I'm struggling with believing that God's will for me this summer is good. I know it's perfect and I know it's acceptable/pleasing but it just doesn't feel good. Sometimes I sit and wonder why is my heart for Russia? It's not a culture that I fit into well-that whole not talking to people on the street or smiling alot in public. But I love it. I see the lack of hope that people have b/c they don't know Jesus. Some think that Evangelicalism is a cult. Some have these intense superstitious beliefs, that they practice but really don't believe. I just miss it. And this may sound silly but I feel like in a way I'm mourning not going this summer.
Here's something that's been on my mind that I just need to type out. I've just been thinking about when we reward people for doing what they're supposed to do. Like at school during WEC some awards were given out and the way they were phrased just didn't sit right with me. And I just wonder if we should reward people for doing the "best" or "most" in missions. Isn't that what we're all called to do? And if we do it won't we be rewarded in heaven? And I just wonder where that line is b/n rewarding and recognizing. I'm all about recognizing things people are doing for the Lord, I just don't know if they should be rewarded. Just needed to let that out.
Okay, one last thing before I hit the hay. I recently re-discovered a Third Day song called "All the Heavens." It is on their Offerings album. It's pretty much amazing. There's a line that I would change but overall amazing. It's just been really helpful for me to get my focus back on Christ and remembering why He came and what He did, His humility and John 15 and Moses. so here are the lyrics-enjoy.
"As Your children gather in peace
All the angels sing in Heaven
In Your temple all that I seek
Is to glimpse Your holy presence
All the heavens cannot hold You, Lord
How much less to dwell in me?
I can only make my one desire
Holding on to Thee
All the angels exalt You on high
What a kingdom to depart!
But You left Your throne in the sky
Just to live inside my heart
I will always make my one desire
Holding on to Thee"
I kind of wish I'd gone somewhere for spring break, Dallas, the city, the concrete, the tall buildings are starting to get to me. I love for the beach or mountains or forest, a field of wildflowers, something other than the lawn on campus. =) Although the tulips do add a little something. I'm not really ready for spring break to be over...it's been nice to have some time. Granted my grand plans of getting my apartment clean and tons of school work doesn't hasn't exactly happened. And my spring break hasn't been terrible by any means, I've had some phenomenal hang out time with people.
I've been missing Russia quite a bit this past week. I'm really thankful for technology and being able to keep in contact with my friends in Russia (and Livvy in Canada). But sometimes talking to them just makes me miss them more. At Bible study tonight we went over Romans 12 and you know I admitted to the group that I'm struggling with believing that God's will for me this summer is good. I know it's perfect and I know it's acceptable/pleasing but it just doesn't feel good. Sometimes I sit and wonder why is my heart for Russia? It's not a culture that I fit into well-that whole not talking to people on the street or smiling alot in public. But I love it. I see the lack of hope that people have b/c they don't know Jesus. Some think that Evangelicalism is a cult. Some have these intense superstitious beliefs, that they practice but really don't believe. I just miss it. And this may sound silly but I feel like in a way I'm mourning not going this summer.
Here's something that's been on my mind that I just need to type out. I've just been thinking about when we reward people for doing what they're supposed to do. Like at school during WEC some awards were given out and the way they were phrased just didn't sit right with me. And I just wonder if we should reward people for doing the "best" or "most" in missions. Isn't that what we're all called to do? And if we do it won't we be rewarded in heaven? And I just wonder where that line is b/n rewarding and recognizing. I'm all about recognizing things people are doing for the Lord, I just don't know if they should be rewarded. Just needed to let that out.
Okay, one last thing before I hit the hay. I recently re-discovered a Third Day song called "All the Heavens." It is on their Offerings album. It's pretty much amazing. There's a line that I would change but overall amazing. It's just been really helpful for me to get my focus back on Christ and remembering why He came and what He did, His humility and John 15 and Moses. so here are the lyrics-enjoy.
"As Your children gather in peace
All the angels sing in Heaven
In Your temple all that I seek
Is to glimpse Your holy presence
All the heavens cannot hold You, Lord
How much less to dwell in me?
I can only make my one desire
Holding on to Thee
All the angels exalt You on high
What a kingdom to depart!
But You left Your throne in the sky
Just to live inside my heart
I will always make my one desire
Holding on to Thee"