fear
5 more weeks left of Illinois, which has gotten better, now I don't want to leave....again. I just am paranoid and get scared of going back because I'm afraid that everyone has forgetten me and I'll be all alone and hate it. And I'm stressing about money and actually having to pay for things (like food so I can eat and not starve to death) and the massive amount of loans that are waiting there for 2 more years when they become bills. And then what if I can't find a job? And have to live with my parents forever? And never have a car. And then the what ifs end because I think that I will find someway to handle that when it happens, and I just need to focus on know and plan for the future rather than fear it.
So one of my roommate's is in Chicago with her family this weekend, and hopefully, if things go as planned, I can go downtown tomorrow and see her. I miss her. I miss all my Indiana friends but she is one of my closest. And I miss downtown, it's almost been a month since I've been there last. I flew over it on the way back from Tamapa, which was amazing. There were a thousand Pi Phi's. We took over. And I actually learned a lot. And it was actually interesting. I had nothing to fear. (I'm sensing a pattern here maybe I should just stop worrying. Then I'll have less wrinkles when I'm older). My next trip out of Illinois is next week when I go to Country Thunder in Twin Lakes, Wisconsin (ok, like 20 minutes away but still not Illinois) to see Keith Urban, yeah! I'm going with Becky who lived across the street from me from the time that I was 6 until I was 15 and moved from Chicago to the middle of nowhere in Illinois. She moved here 3 weeks ago. And it doesn't seem weird at all. It seems like I never moved. We are all caught up.
4 more weeks left of camp. This makes me sad. I want to come back next year. But I need to take summer classes so that I can graduate on time, but if I don't get to student teach senior year and have to stay an extra semester then I won't need to stay and take summer classes. I really, really hope that I get my student teaching. Oh well, we'll see. My favorite camper proposed to me. He's 8 and being the next Mary Kay Letturno isn't really in my future plans so I said no. It's sad that this is the only invitation from a boy in what seems like forever (not that I'm seeking proposals but a date would be nice). My friend Katie Shuttlefield and I came up with a new motto: "I'm single and happy, now get off my back!" (Ok we stole it from the "Chicago Tribune" but it still works).
So one of my roommate's is in Chicago with her family this weekend, and hopefully, if things go as planned, I can go downtown tomorrow and see her. I miss her. I miss all my Indiana friends but she is one of my closest. And I miss downtown, it's almost been a month since I've been there last. I flew over it on the way back from Tamapa, which was amazing. There were a thousand Pi Phi's. We took over. And I actually learned a lot. And it was actually interesting. I had nothing to fear. (I'm sensing a pattern here maybe I should just stop worrying. Then I'll have less wrinkles when I'm older). My next trip out of Illinois is next week when I go to Country Thunder in Twin Lakes, Wisconsin (ok, like 20 minutes away but still not Illinois) to see Keith Urban, yeah! I'm going with Becky who lived across the street from me from the time that I was 6 until I was 15 and moved from Chicago to the middle of nowhere in Illinois. She moved here 3 weeks ago. And it doesn't seem weird at all. It seems like I never moved. We are all caught up.
4 more weeks left of camp. This makes me sad. I want to come back next year. But I need to take summer classes so that I can graduate on time, but if I don't get to student teach senior year and have to stay an extra semester then I won't need to stay and take summer classes. I really, really hope that I get my student teaching. Oh well, we'll see. My favorite camper proposed to me. He's 8 and being the next Mary Kay Letturno isn't really in my future plans so I said no. It's sad that this is the only invitation from a boy in what seems like forever (not that I'm seeking proposals but a date would be nice). My friend Katie Shuttlefield and I came up with a new motto: "I'm single and happy, now get off my back!" (Ok we stole it from the "Chicago Tribune" but it still works).