I'm sorry. I needed to see you. It was a weird impulse that was building, and I didn't know what to do. I needed to be selfish for one night and do what I wanted.
I'm so fucking sick of both of you getting on my ass about what you want from me. Because if Tom doesn't do it one day, you will and vise-versa.
You obviously took things the wrong way. If I was going to get back with you I would do it and I wouldn't drag it out. But Tom wants to be togehter, and I'm done talking to you about the relationship I have with him and I don't want to hear your advice on the subject just as surely as you don't want to hear what I have to say about letting Julie Jazz have your sloppy seconds.
Anyway, I want to be friends, and wish we could be. I'm not leading you on, and besides the impression you got when I came to visit I don't think I have the whole time.
Basically, I need some fucking space. YOU'RE EVERYWHERE. I can't get away. It's like if you're not calling, or texting, there's messages on ALL of my blogs from you. Or you show up at my door. I like seeing you and talking to you but the constant pressure HAS TO STOP.
It's driving me so f-ing crazy, but I'm honestly trying to be as nice as possible while at the same time trying to let you know the severity of the situation in my mind.
I got the wrong idea????donvitocorleoneJanuary 22 2007, 04:02:07 UTC
Why?
Why do you call and ask me for advice about Tom? You called all upset when I was at the Mattress King 2 weeks ago. Why come visit me? You saw how happy I was, if you knew it was going nowhere why torture me and flirt with me while you were here? Why keep telling me how you miss me and you don't love Tom but you are gonna stay with him anyway because it's easier. I didn't ask you to come here, you asked to come here. And if I've been psycho since you left it's because I now have to go back though the fresh pain of losing you all over. That may end up being the most hurtful thing anyone has ever done to me. I was on a cloud Tuesday and Wednesday. That seems years ago now. Julie's company pulled me out of my depression. And now I've been dumped back into it. Alone again. Don't pretend now that you weren't considering it then. I don't know if I failed your test last week or Tom swept you off your feet when you got home or what, but now I really feel shitty. Worse than that I feel stupid. The stupidest I have ever felt. You dupped me. Is this payback? Do I deserve this? How many times can you tell me you know things wont last with Tom and not expect for me to think you are coming back? Why couldn't you just be straight with me before?
Re: I got the wrong idea????ban15January 22 2007, 15:09:32 UTC
Happy? When are you EVER happy?!? I didn't flirt. And yes you did ask me to come. I said I was planning on it, but then you asked me to. So I did. And you didn't "lose me all over again" because you didn't HAVE me again. I have been nothing but honest and what I did was honest to my feelings at the time. I didn't mean to hurt anyone, but you just need someone to be mad at all the time because your life sucks and it's never your fault. So congrats that Julie pulled you up because we all know you can't do it on your own. Maybe you should start fucking her and tell her you love her next month. That'll make you feel better. But that's just how you work: you need anything or anyone else to be responsible for your moods except you. I don't feel bad for what I did to you or Tom because I made a good decision, whether you like it or not.
NOW GET THIS. I know you love fighting with me about how you think I'm a shitty person, but I don't give a fuck what you think. So if this insane harassment keeps up, you WILL be blocked in every way humanly possible from my life because that's how sick I am of hearing the same whiny old crap from you.
The ball's in your court. But if I get one more response like this, you're out of my life.
I'm so fucking sick of both of you getting on my ass about what you want from me. Because if Tom doesn't do it one day, you will and vise-versa.
You obviously took things the wrong way. If I was going to get back with you I would do it and I wouldn't drag it out. But Tom wants to be togehter, and I'm done talking to you about the relationship I have with him and I don't want to hear your advice on the subject just as surely as you don't want to hear what I have to say about letting Julie Jazz have your sloppy seconds.
Anyway, I want to be friends, and wish we could be. I'm not leading you on, and besides the impression you got when I came to visit I don't think I have the whole time.
Basically, I need some fucking space. YOU'RE EVERYWHERE. I can't get away. It's like if you're not calling, or texting, there's messages on ALL of my blogs from you. Or you show up at my door. I like seeing you and talking to you but the constant pressure HAS TO STOP.
It's driving me so f-ing crazy, but I'm honestly trying to be as nice as possible while at the same time trying to let you know the severity of the situation in my mind.
So that's about it.
Reply
Why do you call and ask me for advice about Tom? You called all upset when I was at the Mattress King 2 weeks ago. Why come visit me? You saw how happy I was, if you knew it was going nowhere why torture me and flirt with me while you were here? Why keep telling me how you miss me and you don't love Tom but you are gonna stay with him anyway because it's easier. I didn't ask you to come here, you asked to come here. And if I've been psycho since you left it's because I now have to go back though the fresh pain of losing you all over. That may end up being the most hurtful thing anyone has ever done to me. I was on a cloud Tuesday and Wednesday. That seems years ago now. Julie's company pulled me out of my depression. And now I've been dumped back into it. Alone again. Don't pretend now that you weren't considering it then. I don't know if I failed your test last week or Tom swept you off your feet when you got home or what, but now I really feel shitty. Worse than that I feel stupid. The stupidest I have ever felt. You dupped me. Is this payback? Do I deserve this? How many times can you tell me you know things wont last with Tom and not expect for me to think you are coming back? Why couldn't you just be straight with me before?
This was a cruel trick Becka.
Reply
NOW GET THIS. I know you love fighting with me about how you think I'm a shitty person, but I don't give a fuck what you think. So if this insane harassment keeps up, you WILL be blocked in every way humanly possible from my life because that's how sick I am of hearing the same whiny old crap from you.
The ball's in your court. But if I get one more response like this, you're out of my life.
Reply
Reply
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