Once upon a December ...

[dont_go_west]

There's something in the air. Something like ... a sense of yellow tinted blur, with unusually high contrast between light and dark! There might even be cross-dissolves.

Could this be a flashback?

Comments

[the_h_star_r]

DUN DUN DUUUUUUUUUUUUUN!

[dont_go_west]

West, oblivious to any and all dramatic noises or the fact that he is currently lit in grayscale, is sitting at the bar wishing the bar had internet access so that he could update his blog.

[the_h_star_r]

Homestar, being Homestar, might notice. He's just that kind of nutty.

In fact, he seems to be his good ol' oblivious self, wandering over and humming a little "bomp-bomp-bodle-bodle-bomp-bomp" and so forth.

Then he stops, glances around, and asks West, "Hey, do things look funny to you all of a sudden?"

It's okay if West doesn't understand Homestar. Most often don't.

[dont_go_west]

. . . well. Homestar looks pretty funny, in the way where he has no nose and no arms.

But it's not cool to mock the disabled.

"Uh . . . no more than usual," says West, trying very hard to project vibes of 'I am totally sorry for your plight of being disabled physically and possibly mentally, but please go away and leave me alone now.'

[the_h_star_r]

"Oh. Guess it's just me then. Say, you wanna get a Cold One?"

[dont_go_west]

West is pretty sure this weird little dude is not supposed to be having alcohol.

"Maybe you wanna stick to lemonade, buddy."

[the_h_star_r]

Homestar chuckles.

"You mean melonade."

[dont_go_west]

". . . . . no, I'm pretty sure I meant lemonade," says West, before remembering that it's not exactly going to get him any brownie points to argue with the mentally challenged.

[the_h_star_r]

"Yeah, maybe. But melonade is so much better. Show'im, Sweet Lady Bar!"

Glass of melonade, anyone?

[dont_go_west]

West gives the melonade an extremely dubious look.

"I'm really not thirsty. Thanks for the thought."

[the_h_star_r]

He picks up the glass for himself.

"Suit y'self!" he says, taking a big swig. "Lemme know if ya ever want a drinkin' buddy!"

[dont_go_west]

"Look," West says, rubbing his forehead under his bangs, "don't you have a - a -"

What's the right way to say babysitter to a possibly-grown person without sounding like a douche?

"- a friend you go around with or something?"

Who stops you from drinking alcohol?

[the_h_star_r]

"Who me? Yeah, I got lotsa friends. Not that you'd ever know it with that girlfriend of mine."

Brooms. Who needs 'em?

"She's one of those vegan types. She'd want us all on eco-friendly barstools or 90 mile per gallon tables or somethin."

[dont_go_west]

"Oh yeah, one of those holier-than-thous," says West, which is a nice case of the pot name-calling the kettle.

"I know the type."

[the_h_star_r]

"Yeah. It's getting harder and harder for me to sneak beef-style jerky-snacks into my owns homes. Where does it end, my doge?"

[dont_go_west]

"With fascism," says West, dead serious.

Everything ends with fascism.