I feel like I need to write about some new happenings in my life which have been turning things upside down. In a very good way.
I have been spending almost all of my (very little) free time, with Kris. Levi and Kris mutually broke up and I have been very hesitant to update because I do not want people to think they broke up on account of Kris and I. For the record, things have caught me completely off guard and despite the attraction I had for him while him and Levi were together, I completely respected their relationship and well....things with M were bona fide uncertain and fucked and truth be told, I was chasing after Nathan for a hot minute after the conference.
When Kris informed me of the mutual break up, we began to mutually flirt. Apparently there was a lot of mutual things going on. I thought we were pretend flirting but soon enough, we were like, "Wait...are you being serious? Because I am."
I have a lot of anxiety when it comes to people spending the night and sleeping in my bed with me. I usually freak out, don't sleep, sleep on the couch, and/or eventually tell whoever, that it is best that they go home. It has been like that for me since Dee and I split up over two years ago. It has taken me over two years to feel comfortable falling asleep next to someone and Kris has been over for the past three nights. The first night resulted in me tossing and turning, not getting any sleep, and wanting to freak out in the morning when I woke up next to him. I did have a slight anxiety attack and despite that, he remained understanding and didn't make me feel like I was being an ass. Later that evening, we talked about my insecurities, anxieties, what triggers my freak outs, and why I have issues with letting my roommates know things (mostly because if I am going to have someone around, I want to know exactly how I'm feeling about things and what the intentions are). After that conversation, I fell sleep with someone next to me and woke up being held.
Basically, I will spare you more ridiculous details...for now. Feelings are mutual, communication is wonderful, and I am really happy with how things are going. We decided to call it. And I see potential.
Oh Prudence!
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