Eventful day was eventful
Pick one.
I feel lonely :/
Before it never affected me. I mean Elijah and I always find time in our day to chat with each other, but lately I notice couples more. There are about 5-6 couples in the room daily and they always seem so happy. They like the same things and do the same activities like one play card games together and the other play Pokemon. I felt fine at first, but now I feel sort of lonely watching them. I miss Elijah :/ it kills me being apart and being so limited in what we do. I hate to admit it, but I look at couples and wish I we were doing something we both enjoyed together like that. When we actually are together we are tired from traveling and don't really do much. Last night I sort of mentioned it and it sort of exploded into a "Jenn I know your hurting and you should just leave and find someone who can always be there for you". I don't want anyone new. I love Elijah and I try to be understanding when it comes to visits, but it's so lonely. I miss how we use to be. First semester he'd wake me up every morning and we would talk as I walked to class. We can't do it anymore because of outrageous phone bills so we cut back to only talking at 9, but it's not the same as when were together. When were together I feel like nothing else exist. But lately I have been really tired and he's been helping his younger brother with school stuff so we don't really talk as much/have been going to bed early.
He noticed he hasn't been giving me much attention, but I can't really blame him for it :/ things come up. Which is why I might give WoW a try. It's not the same as being together, but when we played Perfect World it was fun and I enjoyed it and I felt like we were bonding. We stopped playing because he didn't really like it as much as I was starting to.
I don't know where this is going anymore and it's just making me depressed. I feel like I have to hide my feelings from him because if I bring it up again it will only upset him like last night :/ but I really am hurting and I feel empty.
Today was....eventful.
I missed my first class. I knew she was going to drop me and I was so scared to talk to her alone. I couldn't think of anything else except for her saying I missed 6 classes and that she was going to drop me. So because I am a pansy, VA took me to see her during or class time break. She was happy to see me and told me I only missed 3 classes and that I was perfectly fine. I kid you not I was shaking so hard. I knew I missed a lot of classes, but I guess my brain made me think it was more than it really was! I was so relieved~! I talked to my Illustration teacher too I only missed 3 classes there too (we can miss up to 6 classes) he told me my work is great and that he wished I had more self discipline. I felt so relieved. I panic way too much over nothing.
Before that even happen my biggest pet peeve ever was brought up: my race. I am biracial and I HATE it when someone picks out one of my races and throws every sterotype at me about that race. Today this girl asked me if I knew how to dance. I don't really like this girl, at all. She is a thief and the one I posted about that fought a girl for something SHE did. I told her maybe and so she asked again and I said sure. She told me she can "dance like me". I thought she was making fun of the fact that I couldn't dance so I was like "meh" about it. Then she replies "I CAN DANCE LIKE A BLACK GIRL!" I told her I was of mixed race so I don't dance like any certain race.
I guess it's nothing, but that subject is really annoying to me. I don't dance like a black girl I dance like Jenn because I am Jenn.
She is just so UGH! her birthday was YESTERDAY and she brought one piece of cake for herself to eat and asked Heather to tell everyone when she opens her cake to eat it to sing happy birthday to her. No one did. I thought it was really self centered, half the people don't even know her.
Later she flashed her phone in my face like "OMG JENN LOOK AT HOW SEXY MY PICTURE IS!". I wanted to say "why would I want to look at a picture of you when I am already looking at your face", but I just walked away. I dislike flashy people like that. Maybe I over reacted, I tend to do that.
The next thing that happened was in Photography class. I left to go get something sweet because I was having cravings. I wanted to pop in the Wi Fi room for a bit to say hi to everyone. My creepy classmate and his friends watch me as I go by, but this time he decided to scream "HEEEEEEY CLASS IS THIS WAY! WHERE ARE YOU GOING!!!!!!!!!!" I ignored him. I am a classy lady and I don't listen to people who yell at me like I am a corner whore. So I go back to the class when I am finished visiting. He comes down after me and starts rattling my chair and goes "WHAT'S YOUR NAME!!!!!" I told him it was "Bob" and he goes "WHOA SERIOUSLY!? REALLY!?".....what an idiot
After that another friend came in to sit with me. We ended up talking about how I attract weridos. He said it was because I was pretty. I tried to be humble and say I was okay looking and he looks me directly in my eyes (well tried to because I try not to make eye contact to certain people I don't know well) and goes "I'd date you." so I said again "I'm okay looking.." and he SAYS IT AGAIN! I figured it was time to go so I packed up my things and went upstairs.....TO THE LAST EVENT.
Nelson was still there so I sat with him and started talking. Apparently new asian guy asked about me while I was gone. I figured Nelson was pulling my chain. I never did or say anything to this guy before. He started going through my things first! and then using my shit first! I have no idea what business he has with me, but he described me as the girl wearing strawberries today so it had to be me. I don't know what happened next because I had to leave, but ugh I am nervous about tomorrow :/.
I feel lonely :/
Before it never affected me. I mean Elijah and I always find time in our day to chat with each other, but lately I notice couples more. There are about 5-6 couples in the room daily and they always seem so happy. They like the same things and do the same activities like one play card games together and the other play Pokemon. I felt fine at first, but now I feel sort of lonely watching them. I miss Elijah :/ it kills me being apart and being so limited in what we do. I hate to admit it, but I look at couples and wish I we were doing something we both enjoyed together like that. When we actually are together we are tired from traveling and don't really do much. Last night I sort of mentioned it and it sort of exploded into a "Jenn I know your hurting and you should just leave and find someone who can always be there for you". I don't want anyone new. I love Elijah and I try to be understanding when it comes to visits, but it's so lonely. I miss how we use to be. First semester he'd wake me up every morning and we would talk as I walked to class. We can't do it anymore because of outrageous phone bills so we cut back to only talking at 9, but it's not the same as when were together. When were together I feel like nothing else exist. But lately I have been really tired and he's been helping his younger brother with school stuff so we don't really talk as much/have been going to bed early.
He noticed he hasn't been giving me much attention, but I can't really blame him for it :/ things come up. Which is why I might give WoW a try. It's not the same as being together, but when we played Perfect World it was fun and I enjoyed it and I felt like we were bonding. We stopped playing because he didn't really like it as much as I was starting to.
I don't know where this is going anymore and it's just making me depressed. I feel like I have to hide my feelings from him because if I bring it up again it will only upset him like last night :/ but I really am hurting and I feel empty.
Today was....eventful.
I missed my first class. I knew she was going to drop me and I was so scared to talk to her alone. I couldn't think of anything else except for her saying I missed 6 classes and that she was going to drop me. So because I am a pansy, VA took me to see her during or class time break. She was happy to see me and told me I only missed 3 classes and that I was perfectly fine. I kid you not I was shaking so hard. I knew I missed a lot of classes, but I guess my brain made me think it was more than it really was! I was so relieved~! I talked to my Illustration teacher too I only missed 3 classes there too (we can miss up to 6 classes) he told me my work is great and that he wished I had more self discipline. I felt so relieved. I panic way too much over nothing.
Before that even happen my biggest pet peeve ever was brought up: my race. I am biracial and I HATE it when someone picks out one of my races and throws every sterotype at me about that race. Today this girl asked me if I knew how to dance. I don't really like this girl, at all. She is a thief and the one I posted about that fought a girl for something SHE did. I told her maybe and so she asked again and I said sure. She told me she can "dance like me". I thought she was making fun of the fact that I couldn't dance so I was like "meh" about it. Then she replies "I CAN DANCE LIKE A BLACK GIRL!" I told her I was of mixed race so I don't dance like any certain race.
I guess it's nothing, but that subject is really annoying to me. I don't dance like a black girl I dance like Jenn because I am Jenn.
She is just so UGH! her birthday was YESTERDAY and she brought one piece of cake for herself to eat and asked Heather to tell everyone when she opens her cake to eat it to sing happy birthday to her. No one did. I thought it was really self centered, half the people don't even know her.
Later she flashed her phone in my face like "OMG JENN LOOK AT HOW SEXY MY PICTURE IS!". I wanted to say "why would I want to look at a picture of you when I am already looking at your face", but I just walked away. I dislike flashy people like that. Maybe I over reacted, I tend to do that.
The next thing that happened was in Photography class. I left to go get something sweet because I was having cravings. I wanted to pop in the Wi Fi room for a bit to say hi to everyone. My creepy classmate and his friends watch me as I go by, but this time he decided to scream "HEEEEEEY CLASS IS THIS WAY! WHERE ARE YOU GOING!!!!!!!!!!" I ignored him. I am a classy lady and I don't listen to people who yell at me like I am a corner whore. So I go back to the class when I am finished visiting. He comes down after me and starts rattling my chair and goes "WHAT'S YOUR NAME!!!!!" I told him it was "Bob" and he goes "WHOA SERIOUSLY!? REALLY!?".....what an idiot
After that another friend came in to sit with me. We ended up talking about how I attract weridos. He said it was because I was pretty. I tried to be humble and say I was okay looking and he looks me directly in my eyes (well tried to because I try not to make eye contact to certain people I don't know well) and goes "I'd date you." so I said again "I'm okay looking.." and he SAYS IT AGAIN! I figured it was time to go so I packed up my things and went upstairs.....TO THE LAST EVENT.
Nelson was still there so I sat with him and started talking. Apparently new asian guy asked about me while I was gone. I figured Nelson was pulling my chain. I never did or say anything to this guy before. He started going through my things first! and then using my shit first! I have no idea what business he has with me, but he described me as the girl wearing strawberries today so it had to be me. I don't know what happened next because I had to leave, but ugh I am nervous about tomorrow :/.