Jan 16, 2005 14:29
today is confusing...so my mom took me up to Dick's and I got some spikes for track...that was pretty cool...they're this weird blue color and they're adidas...they're wicked awesome looking lol. But I came home and spent the day on the computer. While chatting, I got a date with Josh, my ex. I've been thinking about him for awhile the past couple of days. We were talking and I said we should hang out sometime, and he said that'd be cool. Then he asked if I wanted to go to the movies tonite and see Elektra with him and his friends, as a date. This is what I'd been looking for for the past couple of weeks and now I've got it, but I'm not sure if I'm ready. I just had sex for the first time with someone, and while I'm not interested in that person at all, I just don't really feel ready for another relationship. I don't know why, I don't know how, but I was hurt in the relationship with Chad. My first time was with someone I never cared about, and now he's gone and so is my first time. I wish I had listened to Jamie...she told me to find the right person before I went through with it. But anyways, I don't know if I'm going to go with him tonite...maybe in a little while, I still need to figure myself out. All I know is that from now on I'm taking things slower and making sure I'm positive that I want to do the stuff that I'm doing. Guys, learn from my mistakes: Don't do it if you're not ready or if you don't like the person. It's not something you should do to get it over with, it's something that should be shared with a special person.
Thanks for listening guys, but now I'm out, I have a big decision to make...