In my dreams I never rest
"Go back to sleep"
Slip back into sleep. The place that replaces the ebony with senses. Taste. Touch. Sight. Sound. Hear. Feel. Bleed.
Such an empty room.
Rest doesn't come. Only the feeling of chilled steel against my back. Then I dream. Or do I?
I saw her again. Am I going crazy?
Tiny hands. Tiny white thin nightgown with lace trim.
Her hair is always messy and wavy but straight,
tangeled up with autumn crinkly leaves.
A thin layer of dry dirt sticks to her skin.
I can see where she had been crying.
This time,
she smiled at me.
Staring at me comfortingly,
with those horrifingly clear amber eyes.
It's strange to see her so still.
In the dreams before she was always running.
I could hear sirens going off all around her.
Those sick whistles whirring about in the dead quiet,
until they found their targets and crunched into the ground.
She would always be crying, screaming, shouting:
"Where are you? Where did you go Mommy? Why did you leave me over there? Where ARE you?"
Over and over.
I'd always see her, as if I were chasing after her.
Always only able to see the back of her,
that stringy hair always swaying as she ran.
All I can think of right now.
Was that, all she did, was stare.