My family
Although it's a broken one
Although we all have our own problems
Although we're all not blood related
I still love you all
I am back in New York. It was hard this time trying to be like, "yeah yeah.. leaving again whatever" and not cry about it. I don't know exactly when I'll be coming back to California because of money, so this time around...it hurt a lot more to leave not knowing when it is exactly I'll be coming back. People say it's because I love California, that's not the case at all. It's because of the people I know there. I don't care where I am as long as I have these people with me. If I could bring all of them to New York, I would in a heartbeat. Although this time around I was super busy with the fashion show and all and everyone else had work and school...those little times we did spend were as always, fun. I never laugh as hard as when I'm with all of them. This time around, I did a lot and accomplished a lot. I hope it keeps going this way and I think I've realized that my goals in life has changed. I definitely don't want to live in New York and I definitely don't want to leave all my loved ones. I wish there was a way I can meet in the middle...where I can be a fashion designer and yet still be with the ones I love. Lucky for my friend, he's getting to do that. He's leaving me and going back to SF!! T____T I'm so happy for him. I hope I can return soon as well.
It's amazing how long I've known these people (minus Yan! LOL!). I never thought some of our friendship would last this long, but it did. Truthfully, it makes me happy to know that it lasted for this long.
My birthday was fun, of course it's always fun when I'm with all of them. They make me laugh like no other. Only part I didn't like was the fact that I'm another year older. UGH! Well I am looking forward to the future, new changes, new perspective, new experiences, new faces, new places, and most important of all...same faces. I'm hoping a lot of new excitement and adventure in my life this year, but we'll see. If I get lucky then a "job" won't let me have that. LOLL!!
Out of all the things I want to are my feelings to change, but even now that won't let me rest.
People say you only live once or live life to the fullest.
I tell myself not to regret...and if I don't do this I guess I'll regret later in life.
So here I go, doing something stupid (again) and being an idiot.
But that's how I am I guess, being "brave" or "stupid". Right?
Wish me luck.