Super Junior; Sihan; Learning To Talk
Title: Learning to Talk
Fandom: Super Junior
Pairing: Siwon/Hankyung
Word count: 1,741
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They call him the Chinese Boy, the other trainees, because no one can quite pronounce his name.
A/N: This could be the last in a while, because I'm working on a couple, but I had quite a few outstanding fics, which is why there are so many. But it shouldn't be too long. I hope.
And look! I can write something with Hankyung and Siwon in, without putting Heechul in the relationship. He's still in there, but. Yes. I can't not put Heechul in.
They call him the Chinese Boy, the other trainees, because no one can quite pronounce his name, and it's easier to just say that. No one tries to learn it. It's a fact of life that no one speaks to the Chinese Boy. It's not as though they say to his face, of course; then it tends to be "hey you," and a lot of pointing.
Everyone says that he doesn't understand anyway, and Siwon actually agrees with them. The Chinese Boy tends to nod and smile at people, regardless of what they're saying, regardless of whether they're being kind or insulting. Some of the snobbier trainees have taken to insulting him wherever he goes, simply to see him nod and agree, and sometimes Siwon feels sorry for him, wants to get involved, but the Chinese Boy doesn't stick up for himself. He never speaks; says some stuff in Chinese when he's desperate, but other than that he's silent. He blends into the background, fades away until he's merely an identity, the Chinese Boy.
He doesn't even sing, stumbling over the foreign syllables in a voice that's out of tune more than it's in. He puts emotion in, but that's all he can do, and Siwon doesn't see why he's here, a foreigner in the company, taking up a place that could easily go to someone with actual talent.
The only person who even tries to get close to him is Kim Heechul, an older boy who Siwon is slightly in awe of, with his tough attitude that clashes with his pretty boy looks. He's the only one who talks to the Chinese Boy - just talks to him, chattering away in Korean about things of no consequence; not that the other boy knows, he just nods and smiles and allows Heechul to drag him around. But he still doesn't talk.
*
"I just don't understand," says Siwon to Donghae one day, after a singing practice where the Chinese Boy has been chewed up and spat out and left early with tears in his eyes. "There's no reason for him even being here."
Heechul pauses on his way out of the door and glances back towards them, a towel slung around his shoulders. "You wouldn't say that if you'd seen him dance," he says.
Siwon has seen him dance, though, because they have dance practice together, and he doesn't really see what difference it would make. He doesn't think that the Chinese Boy is any better than, say, Donghae or Hyukjae. He heard that he did ballet when he was younger, but it doesn't show. He recognises that the Chinese Boy has talent but it's not anything unusual, not in the business that they're in. Heechul disagrees, quite vehemently and brings him that night to the one room that still has lights on, a large dance studio filled with the soft noise of classical music.
The Chinese Boy is dancing, really dancing, his legs sweeping around to spin him, his arms moving in smooth, straight lines that seem to cut the air; leaves it broken and leaves Siwon breathless. Ballet, he thinks, and as soon as he does, it changes, morphs into the routine they learnt today but different somehow, softer, casual in a way that suggests he is putting his whole heart into it. He is very good, and Siwon's mouth is very dry, and he can't stop staring.
"He has a name," says Heechul quietly, so they don't get caught.
"What?" Siwon asks.
Hankyung
In that second, the Chinese Boy becomes Hankyung, an entity, something with a name, a form put to the smoke that threatened to disappear before Siwon even had a chance to know him. Because Siwon can talk to a name.
*
"Hello," says Siwon, in Chinese, when he runs into Hankyung the next day in the corridor. Hankyung stares at him, shocked, though whether it's because Siwon has never spoken to him before, or because he's speaking Chinese, Siwon doesn't quite know.
Hankyung breaks out into a wide, happy smile that makes Siwon's stomach clench slightly, and launches into rapid-fire Mandarin that is far too fast for Siwon to even begin to comprehend. "Sorry," he interrupts, and holds up his hands. "Sorry, a little," in awkward Chinese that doesn't affect the smile on Hankyung's face.
"Sorry," says Hankyung, in awkward Korean, and laughs. There's nothing fake about that smile: Siwon sees the person that Hankyung could be, or maybe even is, beyond his silence and self-consciousness that fight for dominance on his surface. Maybe Siwon can love the person underneath. Maybe he already does.
Siwon sits with them a dinner, Heechul and Hankyung, while Heechul attempts to teach Hankyung "useful" Korean phrases. Siwon is glad that he's there, because Hankyung surely will have to need for some of the things that he's being taught. "No," he says in Chinese, "don't," and Hankyung grins and says would you like to sleep with me? and Siwon blushes bright red, and Heechul laughs and Hankyung looks at Siwon as if he actually understood what he's just asked.
Hankyung's happy to let him sit in on his after-hours dance practices; Siwon brings a book, but soon gives up any pretence of reading and just watches. Hankyung turns and dips and glides, and sometimes he closes his eyes and he throws himself into the music in a way that Siwon wishes he could do. After a couple of days he tries to copy, and Hankyung laughs at him and tries to teach him: places his hands on Siwon's waist and holds out his arms and steadies his head, until all Siwon can feel is the brush of Hankyung's fingertips and he's shaking.
And sometimes, if Hankyung spins and lands, just a few metres away from him, and Siwon thinks about reaching out and pulling him close and kissing him, he doesn't let it show.
*
Siwon likes Hankyung's voice. It's soft, and he's quiet, and he stumbles over the strange sounds of Korean, and flows with the sounds of his mother tongue. Hankyung is beginning to learn actual useful Korean, and he can keep up with the rest of them during singing practice, but sometimes he'll burst into a Chinese song when he's dancing and Siwon realises that Hankyung can sing, in a raw sort of a way.
Hankyung learns to talk; mixes his Korean with Chinese and talks to Siwon when they're together. Siwon can't work out what he's saying from the small pieces of Korean that he uses, but he listens and Hankyung grins and Siwon knows that it's inconsequential stuff, but he listens anyway, because Hankyung has finally found his voice.
*
One night they stay especially late, because Hankyung is working on something new, and Siwon doesn't really mind, happy to stay as long as Hankyung is. He falls asleep after a time, and dreams of dancing and fleeting smiles and a familiar laugh, and when he jerks awake, Hankyung is very close and he's frowning slightly, confused, and Siwon wraps a hand around his neck and kisses him.
"You said my name," says Hankyung, and he smiles and pulls his shirt from Siwon's grasp and does a series of complicated spins down the hall, through the panels of moonlight that stream through the windows. He stops and laughs and Siwon follows. Siwon always follows.
*
"Heechul and Hankyung seem close," says Youngwoon the next day at lunch. "You don't suppose they're - you know?"
Siwon looks over at where Heechul is laughing at Hankyung's attempts at ordering something. "No," he says.
"It would make sense, though," says Donghae, putting his tray down on the table. "It would be just like Heechul to take advantage of someone who doesn't even understand what you're asking him to do."
"No," says Siwon later, when Hankyung's fingers are running through his hair and his body is pressed up close. "I don't want to take advantage." Hankyung tips his head to the side and looks at him in confusion, and Siwon suddenly couldn't care less; kisses Hankyung until Hankyung is pressed up against the wall and he's undoing the leather belt he's wearing and Hankyung is moaning into his mouth, a strange sound that's a mixture of Korean and Chinese that Siwon can actually understand.
The next day Hankyung tells Heechul to not take advantage, in the right context, and Siwon leaves him gasping that night in a punishment that Hankyung probably takes as a reward.
*
Heechul is the first to find out, naturally - walks in for a forgotten book, when Hankyung is sitting on his lap and leaning down further and further until the door crashes open and Hankyung almost falls over and Siwon steadies him with an arm around his waist and stares in dismay at a grinning Heechul.
"Well," says Heechul. "This is awkward," and announces the next day over lunch that Siwon and Hankyung are together, only in much cruder terms, that make Youngwoon choke on his own spit and Siwon pray that Hankyung doesn't know that word yet.
Hankyung moves into a flat with Heechul after that, and a younger trainee called Kibum who Heechul has amalgamated into the group. It's only a small flat, with two bedrooms and bare walls, but Hankyung gives him the tour like he's in a mansion; blushes as he says this is my bedroom and quickly brings Siwon back to the living room. Sometimes they spend time in Hankyung's bedroom and sometimes they sit in the living room watching television, Hankyung's head on his lap and Siwon stroking his hair, and sometimes Heechul and Kibum join them, and they talk and laugh and Siwon lets his hand rest on Hankyung's hip and tries to keep a hold of whatever it is that he's feeling.
*
By the time they debut, Hankyung can talk in whole sentences, can practically hold whole conversations, although Siwon and Heechul still translate; Heechul good with body language, and Siwon good with Hankyung. Their debut performance is long and hard and draining - they've spent so long to get to where they are now, worked so hard, and Siwon watches Hankyung dance with a smile, and that's enough.
"We made it," says Hankyung in Chinese that night, when they've collapsed on Hankyung's single bed together, from exhaustion and joy. Siwon's hand finds Hankyung's in the darkness.
"Yeah," he says in Korean. "We did."
Fandom: Super Junior
Pairing: Siwon/Hankyung
Word count: 1,741
Rating: PG-13
Summary: They call him the Chinese Boy, the other trainees, because no one can quite pronounce his name.
A/N: This could be the last in a while, because I'm working on a couple, but I had quite a few outstanding fics, which is why there are so many. But it shouldn't be too long. I hope.
And look! I can write something with Hankyung and Siwon in, without putting Heechul in the relationship. He's still in there, but. Yes. I can't not put Heechul in.
They call him the Chinese Boy, the other trainees, because no one can quite pronounce his name, and it's easier to just say that. No one tries to learn it. It's a fact of life that no one speaks to the Chinese Boy. It's not as though they say to his face, of course; then it tends to be "hey you," and a lot of pointing.
Everyone says that he doesn't understand anyway, and Siwon actually agrees with them. The Chinese Boy tends to nod and smile at people, regardless of what they're saying, regardless of whether they're being kind or insulting. Some of the snobbier trainees have taken to insulting him wherever he goes, simply to see him nod and agree, and sometimes Siwon feels sorry for him, wants to get involved, but the Chinese Boy doesn't stick up for himself. He never speaks; says some stuff in Chinese when he's desperate, but other than that he's silent. He blends into the background, fades away until he's merely an identity, the Chinese Boy.
He doesn't even sing, stumbling over the foreign syllables in a voice that's out of tune more than it's in. He puts emotion in, but that's all he can do, and Siwon doesn't see why he's here, a foreigner in the company, taking up a place that could easily go to someone with actual talent.
The only person who even tries to get close to him is Kim Heechul, an older boy who Siwon is slightly in awe of, with his tough attitude that clashes with his pretty boy looks. He's the only one who talks to the Chinese Boy - just talks to him, chattering away in Korean about things of no consequence; not that the other boy knows, he just nods and smiles and allows Heechul to drag him around. But he still doesn't talk.
*
"I just don't understand," says Siwon to Donghae one day, after a singing practice where the Chinese Boy has been chewed up and spat out and left early with tears in his eyes. "There's no reason for him even being here."
Heechul pauses on his way out of the door and glances back towards them, a towel slung around his shoulders. "You wouldn't say that if you'd seen him dance," he says.
Siwon has seen him dance, though, because they have dance practice together, and he doesn't really see what difference it would make. He doesn't think that the Chinese Boy is any better than, say, Donghae or Hyukjae. He heard that he did ballet when he was younger, but it doesn't show. He recognises that the Chinese Boy has talent but it's not anything unusual, not in the business that they're in. Heechul disagrees, quite vehemently and brings him that night to the one room that still has lights on, a large dance studio filled with the soft noise of classical music.
The Chinese Boy is dancing, really dancing, his legs sweeping around to spin him, his arms moving in smooth, straight lines that seem to cut the air; leaves it broken and leaves Siwon breathless. Ballet, he thinks, and as soon as he does, it changes, morphs into the routine they learnt today but different somehow, softer, casual in a way that suggests he is putting his whole heart into it. He is very good, and Siwon's mouth is very dry, and he can't stop staring.
"He has a name," says Heechul quietly, so they don't get caught.
"What?" Siwon asks.
Hankyung
In that second, the Chinese Boy becomes Hankyung, an entity, something with a name, a form put to the smoke that threatened to disappear before Siwon even had a chance to know him. Because Siwon can talk to a name.
*
"Hello," says Siwon, in Chinese, when he runs into Hankyung the next day in the corridor. Hankyung stares at him, shocked, though whether it's because Siwon has never spoken to him before, or because he's speaking Chinese, Siwon doesn't quite know.
Hankyung breaks out into a wide, happy smile that makes Siwon's stomach clench slightly, and launches into rapid-fire Mandarin that is far too fast for Siwon to even begin to comprehend. "Sorry," he interrupts, and holds up his hands. "Sorry, a little," in awkward Chinese that doesn't affect the smile on Hankyung's face.
"Sorry," says Hankyung, in awkward Korean, and laughs. There's nothing fake about that smile: Siwon sees the person that Hankyung could be, or maybe even is, beyond his silence and self-consciousness that fight for dominance on his surface. Maybe Siwon can love the person underneath. Maybe he already does.
Siwon sits with them a dinner, Heechul and Hankyung, while Heechul attempts to teach Hankyung "useful" Korean phrases. Siwon is glad that he's there, because Hankyung surely will have to need for some of the things that he's being taught. "No," he says in Chinese, "don't," and Hankyung grins and says would you like to sleep with me? and Siwon blushes bright red, and Heechul laughs and Hankyung looks at Siwon as if he actually understood what he's just asked.
Hankyung's happy to let him sit in on his after-hours dance practices; Siwon brings a book, but soon gives up any pretence of reading and just watches. Hankyung turns and dips and glides, and sometimes he closes his eyes and he throws himself into the music in a way that Siwon wishes he could do. After a couple of days he tries to copy, and Hankyung laughs at him and tries to teach him: places his hands on Siwon's waist and holds out his arms and steadies his head, until all Siwon can feel is the brush of Hankyung's fingertips and he's shaking.
And sometimes, if Hankyung spins and lands, just a few metres away from him, and Siwon thinks about reaching out and pulling him close and kissing him, he doesn't let it show.
*
Siwon likes Hankyung's voice. It's soft, and he's quiet, and he stumbles over the strange sounds of Korean, and flows with the sounds of his mother tongue. Hankyung is beginning to learn actual useful Korean, and he can keep up with the rest of them during singing practice, but sometimes he'll burst into a Chinese song when he's dancing and Siwon realises that Hankyung can sing, in a raw sort of a way.
Hankyung learns to talk; mixes his Korean with Chinese and talks to Siwon when they're together. Siwon can't work out what he's saying from the small pieces of Korean that he uses, but he listens and Hankyung grins and Siwon knows that it's inconsequential stuff, but he listens anyway, because Hankyung has finally found his voice.
*
One night they stay especially late, because Hankyung is working on something new, and Siwon doesn't really mind, happy to stay as long as Hankyung is. He falls asleep after a time, and dreams of dancing and fleeting smiles and a familiar laugh, and when he jerks awake, Hankyung is very close and he's frowning slightly, confused, and Siwon wraps a hand around his neck and kisses him.
"You said my name," says Hankyung, and he smiles and pulls his shirt from Siwon's grasp and does a series of complicated spins down the hall, through the panels of moonlight that stream through the windows. He stops and laughs and Siwon follows. Siwon always follows.
*
"Heechul and Hankyung seem close," says Youngwoon the next day at lunch. "You don't suppose they're - you know?"
Siwon looks over at where Heechul is laughing at Hankyung's attempts at ordering something. "No," he says.
"It would make sense, though," says Donghae, putting his tray down on the table. "It would be just like Heechul to take advantage of someone who doesn't even understand what you're asking him to do."
"No," says Siwon later, when Hankyung's fingers are running through his hair and his body is pressed up close. "I don't want to take advantage." Hankyung tips his head to the side and looks at him in confusion, and Siwon suddenly couldn't care less; kisses Hankyung until Hankyung is pressed up against the wall and he's undoing the leather belt he's wearing and Hankyung is moaning into his mouth, a strange sound that's a mixture of Korean and Chinese that Siwon can actually understand.
The next day Hankyung tells Heechul to not take advantage, in the right context, and Siwon leaves him gasping that night in a punishment that Hankyung probably takes as a reward.
*
Heechul is the first to find out, naturally - walks in for a forgotten book, when Hankyung is sitting on his lap and leaning down further and further until the door crashes open and Hankyung almost falls over and Siwon steadies him with an arm around his waist and stares in dismay at a grinning Heechul.
"Well," says Heechul. "This is awkward," and announces the next day over lunch that Siwon and Hankyung are together, only in much cruder terms, that make Youngwoon choke on his own spit and Siwon pray that Hankyung doesn't know that word yet.
Hankyung moves into a flat with Heechul after that, and a younger trainee called Kibum who Heechul has amalgamated into the group. It's only a small flat, with two bedrooms and bare walls, but Hankyung gives him the tour like he's in a mansion; blushes as he says this is my bedroom and quickly brings Siwon back to the living room. Sometimes they spend time in Hankyung's bedroom and sometimes they sit in the living room watching television, Hankyung's head on his lap and Siwon stroking his hair, and sometimes Heechul and Kibum join them, and they talk and laugh and Siwon lets his hand rest on Hankyung's hip and tries to keep a hold of whatever it is that he's feeling.
*
By the time they debut, Hankyung can talk in whole sentences, can practically hold whole conversations, although Siwon and Heechul still translate; Heechul good with body language, and Siwon good with Hankyung. Their debut performance is long and hard and draining - they've spent so long to get to where they are now, worked so hard, and Siwon watches Hankyung dance with a smile, and that's enough.
"We made it," says Hankyung in Chinese that night, when they've collapsed on Hankyung's single bed together, from exhaustion and joy. Siwon's hand finds Hankyung's in the darkness.
"Yeah," he says in Korean. "We did."