Yojin no Yume
I do not spend long in contemplation. I finish the tea in my cup soon after Yama-san leaves. Tomorrow I will visit the shrine on the hill, I decide. Sleep threatens to claim me. I find my way into the adjoining room and my bed, but only just, before I succumb.
The pines sweep low and close overhead, aromatic in the fading heat. Soon enough they will bow under the cold weight of snow.
The many hundred steps are steep, their faces furred with moss, their treads worn by thousands of visiting sankeinin. No visitors have come before me today. Utsusemi crunch under my geta as I climb; the cast off shells of cicadas litter the stones.
Up through the tori and beyond I struggle. Climbing, climbing, I despair of ever reaching shrine.
At last I arrive at the top of the stairs. A silver thread of water trickles from a bamboo pipe into a shallow basin. I pause to rinse my mouth and wash my hands and face. The bamboo dipper slips, silent, into the water. I raise the dipper to my lips. Cool liquid swirls in my mouth and beads on my skin, my hands and face are pale reflections in the small stone basin.
Trailing strips of senjafuda flutter, ragged ghosts that haunt the cool shadows of the shrine, paper spirits tied to the wooden supports. The bells jangle, drawing the kami’s attention. The rope is rough, new. Just to be safe, I clap my hands. I raise my hands, still together, and bow my head. The sleeves of my garment are scented with incense, the smell of aloeswood mingles with the resinous pine. Guidance, I wish for guidance.
Head still down, I back away from the mirror that houses the kami. Once I am at a respectful distance I reach for the offering box. Coins tumble from my fingers to fall into the box with the dull sound of bones.
I do not hear the young priest approach and I startle when I see him beside me. He invites me to come with him, to buy my fortune. He reassures me that my future is known to the kami. His fingers curl around my forearm and tighten as he speaks.
"Come, magistrate."
He is strong. He draws me one step, two, into the cool shadows of the shrine - so much colder now.
Indignant I try to pull away. “Let me go!”
I cannot break his grip. Anger thins my mouth. I do not hide it from him. I take a step backward, widening the scant distance between us. The cast off hulls of insects crackle beneath my foot.
His smile is sweet.
His eyes are blue.