Stars shine the brightest in the dark (One-shot)
"Do you... Hate me?" "No. Because... You are not a bad person."
It wasn't like Kyungsoo started out wanting to cheat on anybody.
"Everybody does it. And if there's no love involved, that's not cheating isn't it? It's just a one-time deal. A transaction. A favor for someone's long-term fantasy." Jongin told him with a smirk, as he sauntered into the bathroom to wash off the remains of that night's rendezvous.
Chanel Chance. Or maybe Versace. Sensual and full-bodied.
Jongin has always liked his catches thin and lean with spicy sass. Even better if they are loaded because it just makes all his video game splurges more impudent.
Kyungsoo isn't brash, but certainly not modest in his desires either.
So he thinks maybe Jongin is right.
It's just a one time deal. An eager fan girl. A desperate idol.
One worships. One bestows.
A necessary cycle of consumption for a preposterous thing called "dream".
So when he sees you that day, holding a black placard with his name in neon green, the unmistakable ardent look, teeth biting into peachy lower lips, white off-shoulder top and denim shorts showing off lanky, creamy legs, he thinks maybe dreams are meant to be fulfilled, no matter how illicit it is.
_________________
"Kyungsoo-ah..." Your voice is trembling from your near hysteria.
He glances up, all eyes and beautiful lips on handsome face as he bids goodbye to the previous fan with a light shove of the cd cover across the table.
"Hello!" He acknowledges with a grin.
"I-I'd missed you," You shakily hands over the page with his face on it. "Sorry I could only come for this fan sign, I've poor luck in draws like these."
"I know," He pouts, much to your surprise, but his next statement throws you off tangent, as he lowers his voice a notch. "I'd missed you too. You're the one I look forward to seeing most at every fan sign."
You blink and try to hold back that choked mewling in your throat, unable to tear your eyes away from his flawless face that is now bent over the album jacket, his hands moving swiftly as he signs his name with a flourish.
When he meets your eyes again, mannerisms somewhat shy as he returns the booklet to you and a sweet "I hope to see you again", you feel as if all strength has left your knees and stumbles off the stage, still heated and dizzy from euphoria.
It isn't until much later when you sit down in the bus and flips open the cover to realize he's written a string of numbers under his signature and the words, "Call me?"
You'd like to think that dreams are as sweet and fluffy as those in the sanctuary of subconsciousness, but now that Kyungsoo is impaling into you, the pain tearing through your body and filtering out in muffled whimpers and sobs on white linen, you figure in reality, they quickly lose their whimsical side.
The singer's grip on your hips tighten as he accelerates his pace, voice coming out broken in hoarse grunts as his thighs slap against your posterior, again and again, sweaty and relentless.
You grit your teeth and clutches the sheets as the heat between your legs intensifies and burns and you think all the sexual fan fictions you've read hadn't prepared you for just how fucking painful it is. There's no pleasure from the start and the in between. You are already dreading the-- uungh-- your face hits the bed from a particular forceful thrust and you lose your train of thoughts.
You twitch, trying to find a more comfortable position but fails in his deathly constraint.
You just wish it will end quickly.
In one final thump, he heaves and pulls out of you, releasing you as your lower body collapse on the bed.
You hear him gasping behind you, the bed denting on your left as he rolls over on his back.
After a few seconds, he speaks for the third time that night,
"Are you... okay?"
You groan and though still throbbing raw from the unforgivable sting, hearing that glaze of genuine concern in his voice, you lied.
"Y-Yes."
The second time it happened, you are caught between feeling elated and fearful.
Happy because he asked for you again.
Frightened because the first time left you sore for two days, everything about this screams wrong.
And if your parents ever finds out about it, you are dead.
Kyungsoo is sure Jongin will give him an earful if he finds out he's doing it with the same girl.
"Don't ever get attached. It gets emotional. Don't break up either. That way you'll leave a live escape route for yourself, they'll keep wondering when you'll come back and won't ever tell no one." He had said.
But Kyungsoo isn't comfortable with whoring different girls. He's careful where the others are careless.
And he did like the way you look at him when he cooks up the "I'm feeling terribly confused and lonely, it's been five years since our debut and things aren't going anywhere" excuse, almond eyes softening and graceful limbs moving towards him as you spoke, firm but not crossing boundaries, "You are the best in my... our eyes."
And that smile.
Your smile is really the thing he wants to see again.
Even that pale and weak one after the deed, your eyes flickering with pain he knew he'd left on you... but still trusting.
And you trusted him still, when he corners you to the hotel's white-washed walls, lights dim and dewy in a poor pretense of romance.
This is no romance.
He greets you with a vehement kiss, no gentle lead-in, no foreword, the story hastily written with impatient nips and callous hands bruising on soft skin and tender thighs. He doesn't even bother with shedding clothes this time, twisting you around in one strong pull and then yanking your panties under your skirt with one hand.
You hear him unzipping his jeans and the sound of plastic ripping and then his lips are on the nape of your neck, sucking sloppy wet kisses alongside your shoulders with intruding hands down the cup of your bra squeezing your breasts.
Your breath hitches as he grazes a sensitive spot and you let out a soft moan despite of yourself. This sudden interruption of your usual silence causes him to slow down a little. And you think you might be wrong but his touches seem more exploration, less avaricious even if his breath is still hot against your cheek and cock heated in your creamy triangle.
He comes again in breathless growls and your bit-back tears.
When he emerges from the bathroom this time, you are disconcerted he doesn't dismiss you straight away. He still isn't looking at you though, head lowered as he sits a good space from you on the edge of the bed.
You fumble with the hems of your blouse, unsure about breaking the silence first.
He does then, voice now smooth and svelte as you adore it, "Is it... your first time?"
"W-What?" You stutter at this ambiguity.
"Were you... a virgin?" His tone is leveled, just barely a hint of emotions... Guilt? But how can it be?
"I..."
You had a boyfriend before but you are young and the two of you had never gone pass the safety barrier of principles and morals.
But he doesn't have to know that.
"I've had a boyfriend before."
It's easier to lie.
He nods. And you think that's probably it, but he speaks again, this time an unmistakable ruffle in his otherwise even tone, "Do you... Hate me?"
Your eyes spark wide at this question, wanting to probe but cowering again as you think it's not in your space to. So you answer the best you can, simple and honest.
"No."
"Why?" It's sounds more self-directed than a question poised to you.
You contemplate for a second, measuring out your thoughts and tone.
"Because... You are not a bad person."
You think this answer satisfies him because the next minute, he gazes at you with that pair of adorable eyes you fell in love with... And still is, thinking this is probably the closest this wayward affair gets to romance, when he says the magic words to break the spell,
"I'll see you out."
Kyungsoo believes words have power. He delivers them everyday over crescendos of high and low notes, signed and sealed in little palpitating fans' hearts.
So when you say he isn't a bad person, he muses over the sentence every other schedule break and it gets real at the end of the day. It doesn't, however, lessen the gnawing guilt at the back of his mind. Especially when he receives a call from his girlfriend of two years back from her one year work trip, saying she's coming over to his apartment for the night.
Kyungsoo is glad he doesn't have to return to the dorm because there's no schedule for tomorrow, but fathoms he'll have to ask his parents to take the night off for a date or something.
However, when his girlfriend told him she misses him and Kyungsoo mumbles "I miss you too" back, he realizes for words to have power, they probably need to come from a sincere heart.
It was a night of quiet routine- eat, tv, sex, sleep.
Strangely, Chanyeol is the first to get caught.
Kyungsoo didn't even know he is one of the partakers. Rumors first start to go round when an anonymous posted a handwritten note by Chanyeol on the forum, the one inviting targeted fan to his hotel room.
Hot debate ensues, majority claiming anyone could have written that note and it doesn't even look like his handwriting, whilst some silently claiming it's commonplace in the industry.
And then a list of "suspects" is posted on the same forum. Jongin, Suho, Kris, Jongdae are some of the ones listed. Kyungsoo searches nervously for his name.
It's not there.
He wonders whether he should feel relief for himself or sadness for his team mates that has been listed.
The manager calls for an urgent meeting.
"No more hanky panky, stay in the dorm for the next six months, until the rumors clear."
Nobody protested.
Kyungsoo, however, finds a spent condom whilst clearing out the rubbish bin the following week.
Jongin gives him a wink when he passes by the room.
Words are as easily forgotten as yesterday's news. More sensational headlines demand fickle netizens' attention and the restraint is shortened by 30 days.
Kyungsoo meets his girlfriend at his apartment again, the five months celibacy and one-way conversations with hand and member finally liberated.
However, when she takes him eagerly into her mouth, all tongue and saliva enveloping him in heat, he finds himself wondering how you'll look like in the same position.
He comes in blinding ecstasy to that image, the words that is your name dancing on the tip of his tongue and evaporating in a shuddering gasp.
It is then he realizes, in Jongin's logic, he's cheating.
In the almost half year of non-contact with Kyungsoo (you still watch him over news and tv but don't visit the fan signs and concerts anymore) , you had agreed to the invitation of that shy boy in your class.
So when your handphone blinks with that familiar number again, you almost suffer a seizure in the middle of lunch with your date.
As you hesitate in front of the hotel room, you vaguely feel as if you are cheating on your new boyfriend.
You are surprised then, when Kyungsoo opens the door and lets you in though you haven't knock.
"Why didn't you knock?" He asks plainly.
"I... " You start, but then the question comes out first. "How did you know I'm here already?"
In all the sessions, you've never seen him stutter, but now he does, wide-eyed innocent look endearing and adorable. You almost forget what he's capable of.
"I... was looking through the peep hole because... it's time but you haven't arrived yet." He gives a sheepish smile.
If not for the annoying guilt at the back of your mind, you would have totally enjoyed this moment and maybe even fan girl silently at this cuteness.
It's odd because this is also the first time the two of you manage more than two sentences without him groping you and getting on with it.
He must have guessed your thoughts because he quickly speaks, stumbling again over his own words, "I-- I'm not going to do anything to you today... so... so... don't worry. And..."
His habitual lower lip biting surfaces. He's nervous? Why?
"I'll... like to say I'm sorry."
You stare at him.
"I'm... just..." He trails off. Then as if remembering something, he strides to the back of the room and brings back a small silver box. "This... is for you."
You regard the gift and slowly mutters, "I-- don't think I should take it."
"Why? It's nothing much, really." He pushes the box into your palm and when you still won't take it, he pries your fist open gently and says, "Take it, it's my form of apology."
You relent, fingers clasping over the box and turning it over in your hands.
"So... That's all. I guess... It's goodbye." He says with a wane smile.
You blink.
"Oh."
You didn't know what to think.
"Ok."
Kyungsoo sees the marked disappointment in your face even as you lower your head.
Instinctively, he walks up towards you and tilts your chin up to face him.
"You'd be better without me."
You bite your lip. You've never seen his face this close. Jet black hair framing boyish good looks. Soft, thick eyelashes, abundant lips and gaze that now seems to pierce through your very soul.
You melt into the pool of orbs and didn't flinch when he leans in.
Kyungsoo doesn't know what he's doing. Rationale tells him to stop but something in his gut makes him press on as he kisses you lightly.
Then begins the colloquy of tender lips, delicate touches and straddling breaths.
You've never had the luxury to feel, but now the sensations are gearing into overdrive and it is all but a bit overwhelming.
Soon, daintiness is exchanged with neediness. Warm becomes hot. Calm into fervor.
The bed squeaks under twining bodies and clothes are abandoned for delicious bare skin. Kyungsoo traces lips and hands across your body and you map circles on his back in return.
When his finger searches into you, you find that you are already ready. He slides in another finger and you cave, desperate arms grabbing his shoulders as you gasp into his ear, "P-Please..."
"Is this... ?" He whispers.
"Yes."
He complies and rips the foil, parting thighs and pausing before gliding inch by inch into you, examining your expression as he goes. When your grimace gives way to moans, he begins thrusting, light strokes at first, then long and deep.
You finally grasp the hype over colliding bodies and when he veers halfway in another direction, a different set of spasm overtakes you and flinging your arms around his neck, you pull him towards you, smothering your cries into his open mouth.
Kyungsoo swallows every single sound and struggles to keep his momentum as he feels your walls clenching around him, tight and hot.
A layer of perspiration starts forming between your bodies and when he feels you are about to near, he pulls back from the kiss and lifts one of your legs over his shoulder, easing backward and then slamming hard into you again. The sheer force causes you to skid a few inches across the bed and he grips your thighs, adjusting himself before he regains the rhythmic pulsing again.
You claw at his arms and keens as you watch him watching you with an undiffused gaze, (You'll later learn that this is pure want) memorizing every curve, every angle and the way his lips are slightly parted in quiet pants. The thumping quickens and you come first, then after a few more erratic thrusts, Kyungsoo groans and pulls out, his white seed filling up the condom.
He collapses beside you, chest heaving.
You gape at the perfection before you, perfection that is so close, but never close enough for hearts to touch.
It is another three years before you see each other again.
The group he was in disbanded two years ago and his long time girlfriend revealed a year later. They set up a cafe called "Starlight" in Myeongdong that swiftly gained a cult following. (You stopped watching all his performances and only gathers updates from occasional entertainment news)
Your interior designer boyfriend is eager to check out the cafe that boasts of avant garde design and raving reviews of their desserts and "Weren't you quite into one of them when I met you?", so it isn't long before you find yourself being half-dragged into the posh cafe.
Sparkly mirrored stars peppers the black ceiling and a lush of red carpet welcomes you into the array of black designer chairs and tables.
For all it's elegance, to you, it feels pretentious like show business.
A petite lady attends to the two of you and you didn't see him until your nosy boyfriend asks about the idea behind the designs, to which the lady calls in the direction of the counter, "Boss!"
He appears, dressed in simple white button up and jeans, clean cut and as handsome as ever. A hint of maturity from age adding to his charm.
If he recognizes you, he didn't express it at first.
He talks easily and casually to your boyfriend, polite and appropriate and laughing at all the right times.
It's not until your boyfriend motions to you that his gaze settles on you. A knowing twinkle before he breaks into another magnetizing smile.
When you leave the cafe, the petite lady hands you an envelope.
"From our boss." She says.
You open it later to find the cafe's discount card and a slip of paper in it with a string of numbers neatly written across it and the words, "Call me?"
You smile, tracing the delicate handwriting before putting it together in the silver box with the star necklace he gave you.
You think that's where it belongs, since stars shine the brightest when they're in the dark.
It wasn't like Kyungsoo started out wanting to cheat on anybody.
"Everybody does it. And if there's no love involved, that's not cheating isn't it? It's just a one-time deal. A transaction. A favor for someone's long-term fantasy." Jongin told him with a smirk, as he sauntered into the bathroom to wash off the remains of that night's rendezvous.
Chanel Chance. Or maybe Versace. Sensual and full-bodied.
Jongin has always liked his catches thin and lean with spicy sass. Even better if they are loaded because it just makes all his video game splurges more impudent.
Kyungsoo isn't brash, but certainly not modest in his desires either.
So he thinks maybe Jongin is right.
It's just a one time deal. An eager fan girl. A desperate idol.
One worships. One bestows.
A necessary cycle of consumption for a preposterous thing called "dream".
So when he sees you that day, holding a black placard with his name in neon green, the unmistakable ardent look, teeth biting into peachy lower lips, white off-shoulder top and denim shorts showing off lanky, creamy legs, he thinks maybe dreams are meant to be fulfilled, no matter how illicit it is.
_________________
"Kyungsoo-ah..." Your voice is trembling from your near hysteria.
He glances up, all eyes and beautiful lips on handsome face as he bids goodbye to the previous fan with a light shove of the cd cover across the table.
"Hello!" He acknowledges with a grin.
"I-I'd missed you," You shakily hands over the page with his face on it. "Sorry I could only come for this fan sign, I've poor luck in draws like these."
"I know," He pouts, much to your surprise, but his next statement throws you off tangent, as he lowers his voice a notch. "I'd missed you too. You're the one I look forward to seeing most at every fan sign."
You blink and try to hold back that choked mewling in your throat, unable to tear your eyes away from his flawless face that is now bent over the album jacket, his hands moving swiftly as he signs his name with a flourish.
When he meets your eyes again, mannerisms somewhat shy as he returns the booklet to you and a sweet "I hope to see you again", you feel as if all strength has left your knees and stumbles off the stage, still heated and dizzy from euphoria.
It isn't until much later when you sit down in the bus and flips open the cover to realize he's written a string of numbers under his signature and the words, "Call me?"
You'd like to think that dreams are as sweet and fluffy as those in the sanctuary of subconsciousness, but now that Kyungsoo is impaling into you, the pain tearing through your body and filtering out in muffled whimpers and sobs on white linen, you figure in reality, they quickly lose their whimsical side.
The singer's grip on your hips tighten as he accelerates his pace, voice coming out broken in hoarse grunts as his thighs slap against your posterior, again and again, sweaty and relentless.
You grit your teeth and clutches the sheets as the heat between your legs intensifies and burns and you think all the sexual fan fictions you've read hadn't prepared you for just how fucking painful it is. There's no pleasure from the start and the in between. You are already dreading the-- uungh-- your face hits the bed from a particular forceful thrust and you lose your train of thoughts.
You twitch, trying to find a more comfortable position but fails in his deathly constraint.
You just wish it will end quickly.
In one final thump, he heaves and pulls out of you, releasing you as your lower body collapse on the bed.
You hear him gasping behind you, the bed denting on your left as he rolls over on his back.
After a few seconds, he speaks for the third time that night,
"Are you... okay?"
You groan and though still throbbing raw from the unforgivable sting, hearing that glaze of genuine concern in his voice, you lied.
"Y-Yes."
The second time it happened, you are caught between feeling elated and fearful.
Happy because he asked for you again.
Frightened because the first time left you sore for two days, everything about this screams wrong.
And if your parents ever finds out about it, you are dead.
Kyungsoo is sure Jongin will give him an earful if he finds out he's doing it with the same girl.
"Don't ever get attached. It gets emotional. Don't break up either. That way you'll leave a live escape route for yourself, they'll keep wondering when you'll come back and won't ever tell no one." He had said.
But Kyungsoo isn't comfortable with whoring different girls. He's careful where the others are careless.
And he did like the way you look at him when he cooks up the "I'm feeling terribly confused and lonely, it's been five years since our debut and things aren't going anywhere" excuse, almond eyes softening and graceful limbs moving towards him as you spoke, firm but not crossing boundaries, "You are the best in my... our eyes."
And that smile.
Your smile is really the thing he wants to see again.
Even that pale and weak one after the deed, your eyes flickering with pain he knew he'd left on you... but still trusting.
And you trusted him still, when he corners you to the hotel's white-washed walls, lights dim and dewy in a poor pretense of romance.
This is no romance.
He greets you with a vehement kiss, no gentle lead-in, no foreword, the story hastily written with impatient nips and callous hands bruising on soft skin and tender thighs. He doesn't even bother with shedding clothes this time, twisting you around in one strong pull and then yanking your panties under your skirt with one hand.
You hear him unzipping his jeans and the sound of plastic ripping and then his lips are on the nape of your neck, sucking sloppy wet kisses alongside your shoulders with intruding hands down the cup of your bra squeezing your breasts.
Your breath hitches as he grazes a sensitive spot and you let out a soft moan despite of yourself. This sudden interruption of your usual silence causes him to slow down a little. And you think you might be wrong but his touches seem more exploration, less avaricious even if his breath is still hot against your cheek and cock heated in your creamy triangle.
He comes again in breathless growls and your bit-back tears.
When he emerges from the bathroom this time, you are disconcerted he doesn't dismiss you straight away. He still isn't looking at you though, head lowered as he sits a good space from you on the edge of the bed.
You fumble with the hems of your blouse, unsure about breaking the silence first.
He does then, voice now smooth and svelte as you adore it, "Is it... your first time?"
"W-What?" You stutter at this ambiguity.
"Were you... a virgin?" His tone is leveled, just barely a hint of emotions... Guilt? But how can it be?
"I..."
You had a boyfriend before but you are young and the two of you had never gone pass the safety barrier of principles and morals.
But he doesn't have to know that.
"I've had a boyfriend before."
It's easier to lie.
He nods. And you think that's probably it, but he speaks again, this time an unmistakable ruffle in his otherwise even tone, "Do you... Hate me?"
Your eyes spark wide at this question, wanting to probe but cowering again as you think it's not in your space to. So you answer the best you can, simple and honest.
"No."
"Why?" It's sounds more self-directed than a question poised to you.
You contemplate for a second, measuring out your thoughts and tone.
"Because... You are not a bad person."
You think this answer satisfies him because the next minute, he gazes at you with that pair of adorable eyes you fell in love with... And still is, thinking this is probably the closest this wayward affair gets to romance, when he says the magic words to break the spell,
"I'll see you out."
Kyungsoo believes words have power. He delivers them everyday over crescendos of high and low notes, signed and sealed in little palpitating fans' hearts.
So when you say he isn't a bad person, he muses over the sentence every other schedule break and it gets real at the end of the day. It doesn't, however, lessen the gnawing guilt at the back of his mind. Especially when he receives a call from his girlfriend of two years back from her one year work trip, saying she's coming over to his apartment for the night.
Kyungsoo is glad he doesn't have to return to the dorm because there's no schedule for tomorrow, but fathoms he'll have to ask his parents to take the night off for a date or something.
However, when his girlfriend told him she misses him and Kyungsoo mumbles "I miss you too" back, he realizes for words to have power, they probably need to come from a sincere heart.
It was a night of quiet routine- eat, tv, sex, sleep.
Strangely, Chanyeol is the first to get caught.
Kyungsoo didn't even know he is one of the partakers. Rumors first start to go round when an anonymous posted a handwritten note by Chanyeol on the forum, the one inviting targeted fan to his hotel room.
Hot debate ensues, majority claiming anyone could have written that note and it doesn't even look like his handwriting, whilst some silently claiming it's commonplace in the industry.
And then a list of "suspects" is posted on the same forum. Jongin, Suho, Kris, Jongdae are some of the ones listed. Kyungsoo searches nervously for his name.
It's not there.
He wonders whether he should feel relief for himself or sadness for his team mates that has been listed.
The manager calls for an urgent meeting.
"No more hanky panky, stay in the dorm for the next six months, until the rumors clear."
Nobody protested.
Kyungsoo, however, finds a spent condom whilst clearing out the rubbish bin the following week.
Jongin gives him a wink when he passes by the room.
Words are as easily forgotten as yesterday's news. More sensational headlines demand fickle netizens' attention and the restraint is shortened by 30 days.
Kyungsoo meets his girlfriend at his apartment again, the five months celibacy and one-way conversations with hand and member finally liberated.
However, when she takes him eagerly into her mouth, all tongue and saliva enveloping him in heat, he finds himself wondering how you'll look like in the same position.
He comes in blinding ecstasy to that image, the words that is your name dancing on the tip of his tongue and evaporating in a shuddering gasp.
It is then he realizes, in Jongin's logic, he's cheating.
In the almost half year of non-contact with Kyungsoo (you still watch him over news and tv but don't visit the fan signs and concerts anymore) , you had agreed to the invitation of that shy boy in your class.
So when your handphone blinks with that familiar number again, you almost suffer a seizure in the middle of lunch with your date.
As you hesitate in front of the hotel room, you vaguely feel as if you are cheating on your new boyfriend.
You are surprised then, when Kyungsoo opens the door and lets you in though you haven't knock.
"Why didn't you knock?" He asks plainly.
"I... " You start, but then the question comes out first. "How did you know I'm here already?"
In all the sessions, you've never seen him stutter, but now he does, wide-eyed innocent look endearing and adorable. You almost forget what he's capable of.
"I... was looking through the peep hole because... it's time but you haven't arrived yet." He gives a sheepish smile.
If not for the annoying guilt at the back of your mind, you would have totally enjoyed this moment and maybe even fan girl silently at this cuteness.
It's odd because this is also the first time the two of you manage more than two sentences without him groping you and getting on with it.
He must have guessed your thoughts because he quickly speaks, stumbling again over his own words, "I-- I'm not going to do anything to you today... so... so... don't worry. And..."
His habitual lower lip biting surfaces. He's nervous? Why?
"I'll... like to say I'm sorry."
You stare at him.
"I'm... just..." He trails off. Then as if remembering something, he strides to the back of the room and brings back a small silver box. "This... is for you."
You regard the gift and slowly mutters, "I-- don't think I should take it."
"Why? It's nothing much, really." He pushes the box into your palm and when you still won't take it, he pries your fist open gently and says, "Take it, it's my form of apology."
You relent, fingers clasping over the box and turning it over in your hands.
"So... That's all. I guess... It's goodbye." He says with a wane smile.
You blink.
"Oh."
You didn't know what to think.
"Ok."
Kyungsoo sees the marked disappointment in your face even as you lower your head.
Instinctively, he walks up towards you and tilts your chin up to face him.
"You'd be better without me."
You bite your lip. You've never seen his face this close. Jet black hair framing boyish good looks. Soft, thick eyelashes, abundant lips and gaze that now seems to pierce through your very soul.
You melt into the pool of orbs and didn't flinch when he leans in.
Kyungsoo doesn't know what he's doing. Rationale tells him to stop but something in his gut makes him press on as he kisses you lightly.
Then begins the colloquy of tender lips, delicate touches and straddling breaths.
You've never had the luxury to feel, but now the sensations are gearing into overdrive and it is all but a bit overwhelming.
Soon, daintiness is exchanged with neediness. Warm becomes hot. Calm into fervor.
The bed squeaks under twining bodies and clothes are abandoned for delicious bare skin. Kyungsoo traces lips and hands across your body and you map circles on his back in return.
When his finger searches into you, you find that you are already ready. He slides in another finger and you cave, desperate arms grabbing his shoulders as you gasp into his ear, "P-Please..."
"Is this... ?" He whispers.
"Yes."
He complies and rips the foil, parting thighs and pausing before gliding inch by inch into you, examining your expression as he goes. When your grimace gives way to moans, he begins thrusting, light strokes at first, then long and deep.
You finally grasp the hype over colliding bodies and when he veers halfway in another direction, a different set of spasm overtakes you and flinging your arms around his neck, you pull him towards you, smothering your cries into his open mouth.
Kyungsoo swallows every single sound and struggles to keep his momentum as he feels your walls clenching around him, tight and hot.
A layer of perspiration starts forming between your bodies and when he feels you are about to near, he pulls back from the kiss and lifts one of your legs over his shoulder, easing backward and then slamming hard into you again. The sheer force causes you to skid a few inches across the bed and he grips your thighs, adjusting himself before he regains the rhythmic pulsing again.
You claw at his arms and keens as you watch him watching you with an undiffused gaze, (You'll later learn that this is pure want) memorizing every curve, every angle and the way his lips are slightly parted in quiet pants. The thumping quickens and you come first, then after a few more erratic thrusts, Kyungsoo groans and pulls out, his white seed filling up the condom.
He collapses beside you, chest heaving.
You gape at the perfection before you, perfection that is so close, but never close enough for hearts to touch.
It is another three years before you see each other again.
The group he was in disbanded two years ago and his long time girlfriend revealed a year later. They set up a cafe called "Starlight" in Myeongdong that swiftly gained a cult following. (You stopped watching all his performances and only gathers updates from occasional entertainment news)
Your interior designer boyfriend is eager to check out the cafe that boasts of avant garde design and raving reviews of their desserts and "Weren't you quite into one of them when I met you?", so it isn't long before you find yourself being half-dragged into the posh cafe.
Sparkly mirrored stars peppers the black ceiling and a lush of red carpet welcomes you into the array of black designer chairs and tables.
For all it's elegance, to you, it feels pretentious like show business.
A petite lady attends to the two of you and you didn't see him until your nosy boyfriend asks about the idea behind the designs, to which the lady calls in the direction of the counter, "Boss!"
He appears, dressed in simple white button up and jeans, clean cut and as handsome as ever. A hint of maturity from age adding to his charm.
If he recognizes you, he didn't express it at first.
He talks easily and casually to your boyfriend, polite and appropriate and laughing at all the right times.
It's not until your boyfriend motions to you that his gaze settles on you. A knowing twinkle before he breaks into another magnetizing smile.
When you leave the cafe, the petite lady hands you an envelope.
"From our boss." She says.
You open it later to find the cafe's discount card and a slip of paper in it with a string of numbers neatly written across it and the words, "Call me?"
You smile, tracing the delicate handwriting before putting it together in the silver box with the star necklace he gave you.
You think that's where it belongs, since stars shine the brightest when they're in the dark.