(no subject)
I feel cruddy. Well, that happens sometimes, a lot, not really, but it happens. My uncle died last Wednesday, or Thursday. I hadn't seen him in a year-ish. Thats another story though.
I think death has been seeping into my life a little quickly lately. My uncle, working at a cemetery. And the latest, thinking about Murphy. Our neighbors had a headstone made for her. OUR NEIGHBORS. How amazing is that? How fucking awesome is that. I love those people, and I loved that dog. And I miss that dog. Jesus, I miss her.
I still cry when I talk about her, and thats why I don't really talk about her. Today, walking Sophie, I let her off her leash when we were still outside. I knew better, I knew she'd run off. But it didn't click, I was on automatic. Murphy would have just sat there, waiting, watching me. I miss that, I miss her.
I miss family christmas, with everybody, EVERYBODY. I miss having a family.
I miss that.
I think death has been seeping into my life a little quickly lately. My uncle, working at a cemetery. And the latest, thinking about Murphy. Our neighbors had a headstone made for her. OUR NEIGHBORS. How amazing is that? How fucking awesome is that. I love those people, and I loved that dog. And I miss that dog. Jesus, I miss her.
I still cry when I talk about her, and thats why I don't really talk about her. Today, walking Sophie, I let her off her leash when we were still outside. I knew better, I knew she'd run off. But it didn't click, I was on automatic. Murphy would have just sat there, waiting, watching me. I miss that, I miss her.
I miss family christmas, with everybody, EVERYBODY. I miss having a family.
I miss that.