My holidays part two By kAt0 the Radioactive Mentalist
Spent the first evening guarding Our Tower - this is the window in our bedroom
Tuesday - Not allowed on Aldeburgh beach proper between May and September. Dogist Baskets.
You can shove your Benjamin Brittan sculpture up your Lardy Da chips. Humans liked Aldeburgh even tho full of Small Yappy Type Dogs. So played on beach outside Our Tower.
Learnt to swim quicksmart. Ground slipped away from under my paws and large French Wave Infidel engulfed me. Fully submerged kAt0 in extreme barkless panic. Tried backstroke, butterfly, crawl. Worked out doggy paddle is the way of an Aqua Dog. Swam like loon back to dry land but then dived straight back in. Bit too scared to swim out as far as boglin and lupercal tho.
Java dryly told me I was a mentalist for getting so wet, Java sat enjoying the view and smells but refused to even get one strand of fur damp. Discovered under the table in My Tower was nice place to sleep and dry out, and could keep an eye on humans and their dropping of food stuffs.
Wednesday - went to Sizewell and had many dumps. Sea Water may be plentiful but its a bit rough on me tum. Very dog friendly place - poo bins, offlead, no restrictions. V Chippy for humans. Had another swim and humans concerned that I would be glowing. Radioactive Mentalist kAt0. Sounds cool innit. Also went to Felixstowe Ferry so humans could try and see Sealand (http://www.newsmonster.co.uk/how-to-set-up-your-own-country.html)
- humans decided Felixstowe Ferry was Village of the Damned, knee deep (shoulder high in me and JaJa’s case) in blonde posh kids all called Olivia playing on a beermat sized patch of sand. Embaressingly, was chased off beach by Small Yappy Type Dog (shit-zoo). Wanted to swim, even with Midwych Cuckoo Kids, but humans said your not swimming in that oily polluted shite our Sweetness. Can see two more Martello Towers in this pic - one is a private home, one storage for boat club.
After such a tiring day - is it any wonder a dog ends up in the wrong basket.
boglin and
lupercal went to orfordness nature reserve (another dogist place) reported back it was the crap - and framlington castle which was apparently the biz and not dogist, so Java and I could have been there rather than playing outside nuclear reactors.
Thursday - Dunwich, apparently have lost 12 churches/friarys/chapels to the sea (Clumsy! Do the action/consequence learning thing dudes! Do the barking maths - not exactly a Stand-Stay is it?). V chippy adjacent to beach. Cows. Dog friendly beach with other walks nearby. Me and
boglin looking for treasure - thats Sizewell behind us, reckon it was following us.
Southwold - lots of brightly painted sheds (which are 37k according to www.rightmove.co.uk) - not allowed off lead on beach, not allowed on pier, sat on some rocks - chipless. Got a tails under from us doglets.
Hey Java You Rock!
After such a tiring day - is it any wonder a boglin ends up in the wrong basket?
Friday - sadly returned back to Canine Feminist Collective HQ to discover that in our absence, The Abester had let HQ fall to an invasion by Sheffdogs. Discovered I had a stowaway. A Tic on me snoot.Going vetwards tomorrow - not scared as am Radioactive Mentalist.