039. counting bathroom tiles
SuJu 100 Fic Challenge: #036. Bathroom Tiles, Hankyung/Siwon
Completed: 009/100
SuJu 100 Archive
Title: Counting Bathroom Tiles [507 words]
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Pairing: Hankyung/Siwon
Summary: Siwon's left and Hankyung feels like he'll never belong.
A/N: Unedited. Sorry if I kill SiHan it's my first time writing them D: I apologize for any confusion, mistakes, and the general crapiness of this fic. I'm running on low sleep, high caffine. History kills.
Whenever Hankyung is bored, he likes to go into the small bathroom at the end of the hallway and count the number of tiles on the ceiling. He counts in Chinese. One, two, three, four, five, six, one hundred and two. Lying in the cold bathtub, his head rests underneath the leaky faucet. He can hear the steady drip drip drip of cold water landing on the flat planes of his chest, soaking the thin material of his worn shirt, chilling his skin, his heart. The tub is freezing and a few inches too small for him to fit comfortably, but Hankyung doesn’t care.
It reminds him of home. The water reminds him of cold winter nights accompanied by even colder showers. His bent knees remind him of cramped beds he had long outgrown. Chinese numbers remind him of the place he could talk; talk and be understood without questioning glances and silent laughter.
Sometimes, when Hankyung begins to drift off (somewhere between two hundred and two hundred and fifty seven), he’ll hear a light knock on the scuffed white door.
There’s nobody there! his mind will scream at him but Hankyung doesn’t listen. He likes to pretend that Siwon is still out there, bearing the bottles of soju and shot glasses and reminding him that he isn’t alone (he feels like he is).
Siwon will set the green bottles on the floor beside the bathtub and tell him to get the fuck out before you bash your head in (Hankyung never does). He’ll pour out shot after shot while Hankyung gets drunk on the alcohol, Siwon, and memories. His vision will begin to blur, Siwon will heave him out of the now-warm tub, then rest Hankyung’s head on his lap.
I miss them he’ll say. I know you do Siwon will reply. Then they’ll be silent. Siwon won’t say anything about the hot tears staining his jeans, Hankyung won’t tell him about his pet dog who has just passed on. When Hankyung finally, finally falls asleep on Siwon’s lap, he’ll carry him into the room Hankyung never admits to liking (it’s too purple he tells Siwon, but Siwon knows he loves purple) and tuck him in.
When Hankyung wakes up with a pounding headache and sore bones, he’ll spot a glass of water on a tray next to two aspirins. There’s a note beside it. It’s a smiley face scribbled on pink paper with the words you better return the jacket, it cost me 200,000₩ underneath it. Hankyung will swallow the pills dry and clutch Siwon’s jacket closer to his chest.
For some reason, Hankyung will always feels safer, less lonely when he wakes up surrounded by the scent of expensive cologne and stale soju.
Hankyung hears knocking again. Nobody’s there! his mind shouts. He’s dead. He’s not coming back! Hankyung fights, telling himself that He’ll come, he’ll come. Just watch.
He never does. Hankyung waits, waits, waits, but Siwon never comes and he’s left feeling like he’ll never belong in this harsh new world.
Completed: 009/100
SuJu 100 Archive
Title: Counting Bathroom Tiles [507 words]
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Pairing: Hankyung/Siwon
Summary: Siwon's left and Hankyung feels like he'll never belong.
A/N: Unedited. Sorry if I kill SiHan it's my first time writing them D: I apologize for any confusion, mistakes, and the general crapiness of this fic. I'm running on low sleep, high caffine. History kills.
Whenever Hankyung is bored, he likes to go into the small bathroom at the end of the hallway and count the number of tiles on the ceiling. He counts in Chinese. One, two, three, four, five, six, one hundred and two. Lying in the cold bathtub, his head rests underneath the leaky faucet. He can hear the steady drip drip drip of cold water landing on the flat planes of his chest, soaking the thin material of his worn shirt, chilling his skin, his heart. The tub is freezing and a few inches too small for him to fit comfortably, but Hankyung doesn’t care.
It reminds him of home. The water reminds him of cold winter nights accompanied by even colder showers. His bent knees remind him of cramped beds he had long outgrown. Chinese numbers remind him of the place he could talk; talk and be understood without questioning glances and silent laughter.
Sometimes, when Hankyung begins to drift off (somewhere between two hundred and two hundred and fifty seven), he’ll hear a light knock on the scuffed white door.
There’s nobody there! his mind will scream at him but Hankyung doesn’t listen. He likes to pretend that Siwon is still out there, bearing the bottles of soju and shot glasses and reminding him that he isn’t alone (he feels like he is).
Siwon will set the green bottles on the floor beside the bathtub and tell him to get the fuck out before you bash your head in (Hankyung never does). He’ll pour out shot after shot while Hankyung gets drunk on the alcohol, Siwon, and memories. His vision will begin to blur, Siwon will heave him out of the now-warm tub, then rest Hankyung’s head on his lap.
I miss them he’ll say. I know you do Siwon will reply. Then they’ll be silent. Siwon won’t say anything about the hot tears staining his jeans, Hankyung won’t tell him about his pet dog who has just passed on. When Hankyung finally, finally falls asleep on Siwon’s lap, he’ll carry him into the room Hankyung never admits to liking (it’s too purple he tells Siwon, but Siwon knows he loves purple) and tuck him in.
When Hankyung wakes up with a pounding headache and sore bones, he’ll spot a glass of water on a tray next to two aspirins. There’s a note beside it. It’s a smiley face scribbled on pink paper with the words you better return the jacket, it cost me 200,000₩ underneath it. Hankyung will swallow the pills dry and clutch Siwon’s jacket closer to his chest.
For some reason, Hankyung will always feels safer, less lonely when he wakes up surrounded by the scent of expensive cologne and stale soju.
Hankyung hears knocking again. Nobody’s there! his mind shouts. He’s dead. He’s not coming back! Hankyung fights, telling himself that He’ll come, he’ll come. Just watch.
He never does. Hankyung waits, waits, waits, but Siwon never comes and he’s left feeling like he’ll never belong in this harsh new world.