Assignment 017 - Kill the junkies, sedate the whores - [Voice]

[doeswhatido]

[[The voice sounds...a little agitated.]]

So far people seem to think the punch has been spiked, we've been brainwashed, I've heard aliens, the fun little idea that somehow everyone of us shot up or shot down or we're all just generally tripping on some super-effective acid but somehow, in all these theories, it's happened to all of us.What about

Comments

POST HAIRCUT!

[emptyyourself]

I am most assuredly not dead.

I SEE SOMETHING THAT LOOKS LIKE SEX ON LEGS IN THAT ICON

[doeswhatido]

And what evidence do you have to prove otherwise?

ME TOO.

[emptyyourself]

A pulse.

NOMNOMNOMNOMNOMFUCKINGNOM!

[doeswhatido]

How do you know there isn't an afterlife where people do have pulses?

[emptyyourself]

What you're suggesting is that, when we die, we go on pleasure cruises.

[doeswhatido]

It makes more sense than the idea that we are all massive cokeheads and alcoholics.

[emptyyourself]

I'm toying with the notion that we're Scientologists; it's slightly more probable than "dead".

[doeswhatido]

........wh.....no. I can't be. I've got a Catholic bible in one of my jackets.

[emptyyourself]

Perhaps you intend to burn it.

[doeswhatido]

I don't think so...I just opened it and I know all the words before I read them.

[emptyyourself]

Perhaps you have an eidetic memory - contrary to current circumstances, of course.

[doeswhatido]

Eid...that sounds familiar. Too familiar. Maybe I do.

[[Fun fact - eidetic comes from the Greek "eidos" which means "to form." Why is this familiar? Eidos is the maker of the Hitman games. :>]]

[emptyyourself]

Yes, perhaps you do.

And we're not dead, but are, in fact, Scientologists.

[doeswhatido]

How can you be so sure? If I'm the lawyer here, wouldn't I be the one with the super smarts?

[emptyyourself]

I didn't make my millions by being a dunderhead.

...Dunderhead? Where in Heaven's name...

[doeswhatido]

...that's rather endearing.

But we're not married.