RP Log with notskywalker
Leila stood in the middle of the apartment, camera in hand as she took snaps from various angles. On the off chance she thought it was the place for her and Rob she wanted to make sure she had the pictures to email to him. She wasn't really feeling it though, and it was the fourth place so far she'd dragged Luke to. She turned to look at her cousin, nose scrunched as she gave him that look that said 'I'm really sorry, but no'.
She hated this. She hated having to suddenly make decisions for her and Rob, and not being able to talk to him about them. She never knew when the next phone call would come, and the emails were intermittent. It wasn't enough. They were still new to their relationship, and extremely new to their marriage. Leila wanted to be curled up with him after more fantastic sex, and falling asleep with his arms around her.
She let out a sigh, her shoulders dropping as she let the camera hang around her neck. Leila lifted her glasses up to rub at her eyes, and turned around to look again at the mediocre apartment. The wallpaper was hideous, but she supposed it could always be fixed up. Still, it didn't scream her and Rob's names. She wasn't even sure if any place would.
Luke puffed his cheeks out and let the breath out in a rush. "Remind me why I'm here again," he said, massaging at his shoulders that had started to stiffen up from the sheer amount of times he had spent looking up, and down, and around, and over, and under, and in and out or everything to do with property. "I don't even own a marital home. Why am I here looking for yours? I could be, I dunno, wanking. Knitting. Maybe baking scones." He looked around, scrunching his nose up at the decor. "This isn't even slightly appealing. Why did you come here?"
"It was available and cheap?" Leila replied, but even she sounded like she didn't buy her answer. "And I don't give a toss about you not having a marital home. At least you have the bloody marital part." She held up a hand in apology. "I'm sorry, that was unfair. I'm just getting tired. Maybe we should call it a day? I don't think any of these places are right. Maybe I'm never going to find somewhere? We'll be doomed to live apart. Worse than the couples that sleep in separate beds in the same room. I needed you here for a guy's opinion. Just pretend to be a soldier."
Luke snorted and pulled his lips to the side wryly. "You have have the marital part. He could have fucked off to the Middle East without putting a ring on your finger, you know," he reminded her, trying to get her to see some of the positive in things. "Did he say you had to look for cheap? There's better stuff than this around for just a bit more, you know. You just have to know what you're looking for. You know Andy spoke to him? The other night, online."
Leila's eyebrows went up. "He did? No, I didn't know. Did it go okay? Does Andy want to do the growly puppy thing, too?" Leila put her hands on her hips as she scuffed the floorboard with her shoe. "No, he didn't. I just don't want to go spending too much. He said he could provide for me."
Luke shook his head. "Nope. Andy said they talked for awhile. Rob's pretty discontent, so Andy just chatted to him about it all, and about general guy stuff. Like farting in the barracks," he had to laugh and then shot her a smirk. "Your soldier is a shy one in new relationships apparently." He went over to her and took her hand, making her point in the general direction of the walls. "This isn't providing. He wants you to find a home, right? Is this really something you want to call a home? Something you think he would like to come home from war to?"
"I think it would be something he'd want to go to war to get away from," Leila replied quietly as she frowned. "It's not home. Wait, farting? What's that go to do with a new relationship and being shy?"
"Ditto," Luke said with a small snort. The place really did suck. He shrugged slightly. "Because it was boy talk? It started with Rob talking about rations and a sore stomach and veered onto the track of farting, and Rob admitting he was still a little shy around you. You know Andy. He can get anyone to talk about anything. I guess Rob just needed to chat about the relationship?"
Leila nodded a little as she caught her bottom lip between her teeth. "Probably. I don't know if he's really got anyone to talk to about it. I've got you and Andy. Well, when he comes home I'll just fart on him and fix the problem. I did grow up around you two. I can fart pretty damn good."
Luke sniggered. "Tell me about it. I just think you've got a good guy there. He seems... nice. You're probably right about the talking thing. If he's transferred from his usual batallion, he's not going to be over there with friends, is he? Andy just said he talked about you a lot, was concerned about how you were, and sounded sad. He was glad he grabbed the chance to talk to him. It's a big thing you're going through, L."
Leila smirked a little, proud that she could keep up with the boys. "No, he's not. He even said that. Plus his family's in Littlerock and don't know me from a bar of soap. I'm glad he could talk to Andy. I hate the idea of him being sad, but I'm not much better. I miss him like crazy. Sometimes I can't really sleep because I just want him next to me so badly."
"You should talk to him," Luke told her quietly and took both her hands in his. "I think you were at work when Andy spoke to him. You should set up a laptop out the back of the bar and just keep an eye out if he comes online. Talk to him whenever you get the chance. I don't mind, okay? It's not going to get easier the longer he's away, it's just going to get harder. I don't want to upset you or anything, but how would you feel if something happened to him and you hadn't spoken to him much? You'd be devastated. Guilty. Feel cheated. Maybe this military wife thing, you just gotta do what you gotta do. And use the rest of us to help you out where we can. Even small things, if you think they're going to bring you both comfort, then do it."
"You'd really let me do that?" Leila hugged her cousin, resting her head on his shoulder. "I'm glad I came back. Not sure I'd be able to do this without you guys. And this wallpaper really is fucking hideous. Make sure I don't buy a place with wallpaper, okay?"
Luke shrugged, and gave another glance around the apartment. "Yeah, I'm sure. I'll just say for the next few months, you're surplus to requirement. Whenever you need to talk to him, just go for it. I know what the early days of a relationship are like, and you need to do what you can to make it work. Plus, he probably needs it just as much as you do. I can't even think what it would be like to do a job like he does. And you know what? Your mood is really affecting your ability to find apartments with character," he added with a smirk. "I think this decor is reflecting how you feel, and making me slightly on the nauseous side, but I think that's because I saw puke in The Bondi's bathroom the colour of this wallpaper last week."
Leila scrunched up her nose as she pulled back from the hug. "Great, now I'm feeling nauseous. I think we should just call it a day, and I'll start with a fresh list next time. Definitely going for less cheap. And definitely taking you up on the offer to talk to Rob whenever I can. I am not loving the fact that this place is reflecting how I feel. I am not this apartment, Lulu."
"Well, it is." Luke paused and turned to her, his face reflecting a hint of concern he was trying not to show to her too much. "You know, L, this is just the first time you're experiencing him getting shipped out. It's not going to be the last. You might have very little time together with him at the end of the day. Are you sure this is the life you want?"
Leila ran her fingers through her knotted blonde hair and gave a nod. "Yeah, I'm sure. I'd rather what little of Rob I could get than no Rob at all. I just need to work through this first bit. I'll find a rhythm, Luke, trust me. It's not like I haven't been alone before."
Luke shook his head. "This isn't the same. You're not just alone. You're alone and separated from someone you need to be with. It's not just a matter of finding a rhythm, because the fact he's away is still going to be hanging over you. And what about your job? Or are you not going to pursue that anymore?" he asked.
She looked at him. "The photography? It's just going to have to change, I think. Unless I find a way to be comfortable travelling while Rob's away, but it would make the contact harder. If I'm still in New York, then I can be easy to find. I might just have to think about a different line of photography. Something that's here in New York and doesn't need much travel."
Luke pressed his lips together. "If you're sure..." he said, trailing off. "Big call to change your life like that for someone."
"You moved to Princeton," she felt the need to point out.
Luke looked at her skeptically. "Princeton is two hours drive away. I still own my apartment and bar in New York."
"Yeah, and I'm going to be living in New York. I think I'm allowed to work in the same city. It was freelance work, Luke. It's never been guaranteed employment, that's why I wind up doing bar stints in between." She gave a shrug, pushing her glasses up as she rubbed at her eyes again. "It's not that big of a call."
"Just trying to play Devil's Advocate," Luke murmured, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Andy's better at all this shit than I am. All I can see is you changing everything for a guy you just... just met," he finally admitted with a small frown of concern.
Leila reached out to hook her arm around Luke's. "I know, and I wish you could know him. But you do know me, and you know I wouldn't change anything I didn't want to. I'm not being forced to do any of this. Rob isn't asking me to. I'm choosing to. So please... just go along with it for now, okay?"
Luke found himself wondering how Tab would handle a situation like this. If Riley met someone and suddenly turned his life in a 360 direction for them because he had fallen for them. The only thing was, it was probably more likely that Tab would do something like that. Maybe actually did, when she met Luke. And then there was Aiden, who did exactly that because he fell so deeply in love with Pat so quickly, that it just progressed to the point that Aiden ended up moving to Princeton when Luke thought he had been the epitome of the New York Metrosexual. But Pat wasn't military. Luke was actually terrified that at any minute, Leila was going to get a phone call that could shatter her world. Where did that leave her then? He nodded. "Okay, whatever you think is best," he told her and then pointed to the door with his thumb. "We should get going."
Leila was still looking at him like she was trying to work out if he understood yet, but she nodded. If she spent much longer in the apartment she would be sick, and she wasn't sure it was just from the wallpaper anymore. None of the decisions she'd made since she'd met Rob had felt wrong, but the aching loneliness that came with missing him was definitely starting to affect her. She held onto Luke's arm, hoping her cousin would understand at some point. She couldn't exactly do any of this without both Luke and Andy supporting her.
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She hated this. She hated having to suddenly make decisions for her and Rob, and not being able to talk to him about them. She never knew when the next phone call would come, and the emails were intermittent. It wasn't enough. They were still new to their relationship, and extremely new to their marriage. Leila wanted to be curled up with him after more fantastic sex, and falling asleep with his arms around her.
She let out a sigh, her shoulders dropping as she let the camera hang around her neck. Leila lifted her glasses up to rub at her eyes, and turned around to look again at the mediocre apartment. The wallpaper was hideous, but she supposed it could always be fixed up. Still, it didn't scream her and Rob's names. She wasn't even sure if any place would.
Luke puffed his cheeks out and let the breath out in a rush. "Remind me why I'm here again," he said, massaging at his shoulders that had started to stiffen up from the sheer amount of times he had spent looking up, and down, and around, and over, and under, and in and out or everything to do with property. "I don't even own a marital home. Why am I here looking for yours? I could be, I dunno, wanking. Knitting. Maybe baking scones." He looked around, scrunching his nose up at the decor. "This isn't even slightly appealing. Why did you come here?"
"It was available and cheap?" Leila replied, but even she sounded like she didn't buy her answer. "And I don't give a toss about you not having a marital home. At least you have the bloody marital part." She held up a hand in apology. "I'm sorry, that was unfair. I'm just getting tired. Maybe we should call it a day? I don't think any of these places are right. Maybe I'm never going to find somewhere? We'll be doomed to live apart. Worse than the couples that sleep in separate beds in the same room. I needed you here for a guy's opinion. Just pretend to be a soldier."
Luke snorted and pulled his lips to the side wryly. "You have have the marital part. He could have fucked off to the Middle East without putting a ring on your finger, you know," he reminded her, trying to get her to see some of the positive in things. "Did he say you had to look for cheap? There's better stuff than this around for just a bit more, you know. You just have to know what you're looking for. You know Andy spoke to him? The other night, online."
Leila's eyebrows went up. "He did? No, I didn't know. Did it go okay? Does Andy want to do the growly puppy thing, too?" Leila put her hands on her hips as she scuffed the floorboard with her shoe. "No, he didn't. I just don't want to go spending too much. He said he could provide for me."
Luke shook his head. "Nope. Andy said they talked for awhile. Rob's pretty discontent, so Andy just chatted to him about it all, and about general guy stuff. Like farting in the barracks," he had to laugh and then shot her a smirk. "Your soldier is a shy one in new relationships apparently." He went over to her and took her hand, making her point in the general direction of the walls. "This isn't providing. He wants you to find a home, right? Is this really something you want to call a home? Something you think he would like to come home from war to?"
"I think it would be something he'd want to go to war to get away from," Leila replied quietly as she frowned. "It's not home. Wait, farting? What's that go to do with a new relationship and being shy?"
"Ditto," Luke said with a small snort. The place really did suck. He shrugged slightly. "Because it was boy talk? It started with Rob talking about rations and a sore stomach and veered onto the track of farting, and Rob admitting he was still a little shy around you. You know Andy. He can get anyone to talk about anything. I guess Rob just needed to chat about the relationship?"
Leila nodded a little as she caught her bottom lip between her teeth. "Probably. I don't know if he's really got anyone to talk to about it. I've got you and Andy. Well, when he comes home I'll just fart on him and fix the problem. I did grow up around you two. I can fart pretty damn good."
Luke sniggered. "Tell me about it. I just think you've got a good guy there. He seems... nice. You're probably right about the talking thing. If he's transferred from his usual batallion, he's not going to be over there with friends, is he? Andy just said he talked about you a lot, was concerned about how you were, and sounded sad. He was glad he grabbed the chance to talk to him. It's a big thing you're going through, L."
Leila smirked a little, proud that she could keep up with the boys. "No, he's not. He even said that. Plus his family's in Littlerock and don't know me from a bar of soap. I'm glad he could talk to Andy. I hate the idea of him being sad, but I'm not much better. I miss him like crazy. Sometimes I can't really sleep because I just want him next to me so badly."
"You should talk to him," Luke told her quietly and took both her hands in his. "I think you were at work when Andy spoke to him. You should set up a laptop out the back of the bar and just keep an eye out if he comes online. Talk to him whenever you get the chance. I don't mind, okay? It's not going to get easier the longer he's away, it's just going to get harder. I don't want to upset you or anything, but how would you feel if something happened to him and you hadn't spoken to him much? You'd be devastated. Guilty. Feel cheated. Maybe this military wife thing, you just gotta do what you gotta do. And use the rest of us to help you out where we can. Even small things, if you think they're going to bring you both comfort, then do it."
"You'd really let me do that?" Leila hugged her cousin, resting her head on his shoulder. "I'm glad I came back. Not sure I'd be able to do this without you guys. And this wallpaper really is fucking hideous. Make sure I don't buy a place with wallpaper, okay?"
Luke shrugged, and gave another glance around the apartment. "Yeah, I'm sure. I'll just say for the next few months, you're surplus to requirement. Whenever you need to talk to him, just go for it. I know what the early days of a relationship are like, and you need to do what you can to make it work. Plus, he probably needs it just as much as you do. I can't even think what it would be like to do a job like he does. And you know what? Your mood is really affecting your ability to find apartments with character," he added with a smirk. "I think this decor is reflecting how you feel, and making me slightly on the nauseous side, but I think that's because I saw puke in The Bondi's bathroom the colour of this wallpaper last week."
Leila scrunched up her nose as she pulled back from the hug. "Great, now I'm feeling nauseous. I think we should just call it a day, and I'll start with a fresh list next time. Definitely going for less cheap. And definitely taking you up on the offer to talk to Rob whenever I can. I am not loving the fact that this place is reflecting how I feel. I am not this apartment, Lulu."
"Well, it is." Luke paused and turned to her, his face reflecting a hint of concern he was trying not to show to her too much. "You know, L, this is just the first time you're experiencing him getting shipped out. It's not going to be the last. You might have very little time together with him at the end of the day. Are you sure this is the life you want?"
Leila ran her fingers through her knotted blonde hair and gave a nod. "Yeah, I'm sure. I'd rather what little of Rob I could get than no Rob at all. I just need to work through this first bit. I'll find a rhythm, Luke, trust me. It's not like I haven't been alone before."
Luke shook his head. "This isn't the same. You're not just alone. You're alone and separated from someone you need to be with. It's not just a matter of finding a rhythm, because the fact he's away is still going to be hanging over you. And what about your job? Or are you not going to pursue that anymore?" he asked.
She looked at him. "The photography? It's just going to have to change, I think. Unless I find a way to be comfortable travelling while Rob's away, but it would make the contact harder. If I'm still in New York, then I can be easy to find. I might just have to think about a different line of photography. Something that's here in New York and doesn't need much travel."
Luke pressed his lips together. "If you're sure..." he said, trailing off. "Big call to change your life like that for someone."
"You moved to Princeton," she felt the need to point out.
Luke looked at her skeptically. "Princeton is two hours drive away. I still own my apartment and bar in New York."
"Yeah, and I'm going to be living in New York. I think I'm allowed to work in the same city. It was freelance work, Luke. It's never been guaranteed employment, that's why I wind up doing bar stints in between." She gave a shrug, pushing her glasses up as she rubbed at her eyes again. "It's not that big of a call."
"Just trying to play Devil's Advocate," Luke murmured, shoving his hands into his pockets. "Andy's better at all this shit than I am. All I can see is you changing everything for a guy you just... just met," he finally admitted with a small frown of concern.
Leila reached out to hook her arm around Luke's. "I know, and I wish you could know him. But you do know me, and you know I wouldn't change anything I didn't want to. I'm not being forced to do any of this. Rob isn't asking me to. I'm choosing to. So please... just go along with it for now, okay?"
Luke found himself wondering how Tab would handle a situation like this. If Riley met someone and suddenly turned his life in a 360 direction for them because he had fallen for them. The only thing was, it was probably more likely that Tab would do something like that. Maybe actually did, when she met Luke. And then there was Aiden, who did exactly that because he fell so deeply in love with Pat so quickly, that it just progressed to the point that Aiden ended up moving to Princeton when Luke thought he had been the epitome of the New York Metrosexual. But Pat wasn't military. Luke was actually terrified that at any minute, Leila was going to get a phone call that could shatter her world. Where did that leave her then? He nodded. "Okay, whatever you think is best," he told her and then pointed to the door with his thumb. "We should get going."
Leila was still looking at him like she was trying to work out if he understood yet, but she nodded. If she spent much longer in the apartment she would be sick, and she wasn't sure it was just from the wallpaper anymore. None of the decisions she'd made since she'd met Rob had felt wrong, but the aching loneliness that came with missing him was definitely starting to affect her. She held onto Luke's arm, hoping her cousin would understand at some point. She couldn't exactly do any of this without both Luke and Andy supporting her.
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