subject later
I remember this now! I remember the mania.
It's not being able to stop moving. It's jumping in place because even though you're tired enough you think you'll pass out you still somehow have ENERGY fighting to fly out of your skin. It's weird cravings, and you give in to them because hell why the fuck NOT? It's two eight hour shifts only eight hours away from each other and riding a bike head-first into thirty MPH wind TWICE in that time and STILL somehow fuckingfuckingfuckingfuckingFUCKING being awake at five in the morning too jittery and high on nothing but the chemicals my body naturally produces to sleep or even STOP THINKING but also too THAT to focus on fucking ANYTHING GODDAMMIT FUCKING HELL!
I can't draw 'cause I'm sure the pencil would jerk halfway across the page if I tried to draw an inch. I can't write because becausebecausebecause my fingers keep slipping on the keys and and and my brain won't FUCKING FOCUS long enough to even type the shit I wrote at work OMG WHYYY???
GOTTA GO JUMPS'MOREBRB
jumping in circles makes me dizzy apparently. fuck.
can i go pass out now?
It's not being able to stop moving. It's jumping in place because even though you're tired enough you think you'll pass out you still somehow have ENERGY fighting to fly out of your skin. It's weird cravings, and you give in to them because hell why the fuck NOT? It's two eight hour shifts only eight hours away from each other and riding a bike head-first into thirty MPH wind TWICE in that time and STILL somehow fuckingfuckingfuckingfuckingFUCKING being awake at five in the morning too jittery and high on nothing but the chemicals my body naturally produces to sleep or even STOP THINKING but also too THAT to focus on fucking ANYTHING GODDAMMIT FUCKING HELL!
I can't draw 'cause I'm sure the pencil would jerk halfway across the page if I tried to draw an inch. I can't write because becausebecausebecause my fingers keep slipping on the keys and and and my brain won't FUCKING FOCUS long enough to even type the shit I wrote at work OMG WHYYY???
GOTTA GO JUMPS'MOREBRB
jumping in circles makes me dizzy apparently. fuck.
can i go pass out now?