Meh
Howdy f-listers
Apologies for the MEGA long last post.
Let's start with the good news. I have lost another 4.5 pounds at my last WW weigh in, bringing my total to 13.5 pounds!! I am so pleased, I am down a dress size and it is comfy.
A couple of you commented on the fact that I don't really believe in myself as per the last meme I posted. Well I am starting to work on that.
Following my meltdown as I said in my previous post, I went to the doctors on Friday and he confirmed that my depression is back and it is worse than ever before, so he has put me back on medication. It is a tablet that I used to be on, but whereas I was on 5mg before I am now on 20mg of citalopram which is used to treat severe depression with mood disorders, which is what my doctor thinks I might have. Not entirely sure what the mood disorder thing is but I think it might be connected with my mood swings and stuff, and he is planning on referring me to the hospital as he thinks I might have a mild form of bi-polar (manic depression) so we will see how that works out.
I am slightly scared of that being the end diagnosis, but in one respect it might be a good thing so I have something to call it rather than just saying I have depression, because the reaction most people have is "what do you have to be depressed about?" or "just pull yourself together", because right now nothing would make me feel happy and if I could pull myself together, would I really want to take massive amounts of drugs.
I am very sorry if I seem soo morose and moody on my posts, but I find it helpful to write it all down. Hope I don't bore anyone too much.
Simples *squeak* (sorry I love Compare the Meerkats, youtube it)
Kirsty
Apologies for the MEGA long last post.
Let's start with the good news. I have lost another 4.5 pounds at my last WW weigh in, bringing my total to 13.5 pounds!! I am so pleased, I am down a dress size and it is comfy.
A couple of you commented on the fact that I don't really believe in myself as per the last meme I posted. Well I am starting to work on that.
Following my meltdown as I said in my previous post, I went to the doctors on Friday and he confirmed that my depression is back and it is worse than ever before, so he has put me back on medication. It is a tablet that I used to be on, but whereas I was on 5mg before I am now on 20mg of citalopram which is used to treat severe depression with mood disorders, which is what my doctor thinks I might have. Not entirely sure what the mood disorder thing is but I think it might be connected with my mood swings and stuff, and he is planning on referring me to the hospital as he thinks I might have a mild form of bi-polar (manic depression) so we will see how that works out.
I am slightly scared of that being the end diagnosis, but in one respect it might be a good thing so I have something to call it rather than just saying I have depression, because the reaction most people have is "what do you have to be depressed about?" or "just pull yourself together", because right now nothing would make me feel happy and if I could pull myself together, would I really want to take massive amounts of drugs.
I am very sorry if I seem soo morose and moody on my posts, but I find it helpful to write it all down. Hope I don't bore anyone too much.
Simples *squeak* (sorry I love Compare the Meerkats, youtube it)
Kirsty